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This blog is not one to crow over the misfortune of others

Follow us on Twitter @Untold Arsenal

 

By Tony Attwood

I didn’t watch the games last night, preferring to spend a pleasant evening in a public house called, appropriately (since I wrote “Making the Arsenal” which is all about Henry Norris) the Norris in Lincolnshire, where we discussed the problems of selling outsize clothes to men.

It was a jolly evening, and we broke up around 10.40pm and went our separate ways.

Around 11.05, which is the time usually dedicated by Radio 5 to reading the 11pm news, it was mentioned that both the clubs of Manchester in northern England had dropped out of the Champions League.

After extracting my car from the hedge into which it had somehow mysteriously embedded itself I found myself strangely reminded of a music hall song written by Charles Jolly under the name Charles Penrose, with his wife Mabel Jolly under the name Billie Grey.  It was popular in the 1920s and indeed stayed popular for many years thereafter, although in fact it was based on a song from the 1890s by George Johnson.    It has also been very popular in Sweden I’m told, under the name “Den skrattande polisen”.  In English it is the Laughing Policeman.

It is a gentle and moving piece, and although I can’t actually convey the depth of emotion within it, just in this blog, (although it is on You Tube) the lyrics of the chorus might convey something of which I felt….

It goes…

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

As I said in the headline I am not one to mock the misfortune of others, although we might note in passing just how much it has cost Manchester Oil to get into the Europa League.   I said the other day that they had had the most expensive shot in football, when they managed to shoot at Arsenal’s goal just once in a match in which they had around £300m worth of talent on the pitch.   Last night’s Team Glazer must have been worth quite a bit to.

Although some of these Swiss teams can be rather nifty in the footwork.

But there it is.  Time to draw a line.  Time to move on.   Time to make sure you are doing something else on a Thursday night, because you can be utterly certain that the emphasis of international club football on the English media next year will be Thursday Thursday Thursday.

As for me – I’ve got some egg on face over the statue business, having proudly proclaimed that the three statues are of managers, only to find out from the BBC yesterday that the three are Chapman, Adams and Henry.

I’ve no problem with that, and for me the key thing is that the suggestion of the AISA Arsenal History Society that we put up three statues, and that the first should be Chapman, has been taken up.  I’m still rather pleased.

Now, where was I.

Oh yes

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

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“Making the Arsenal”is available on Amazon, Arsenal on line, the Woolwich Arsenal site and in the Arsenal store.

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52 comments to This blog is not one to crow over the misfortune of others

  • The Law

    Oh Tony, you old scamp! You made me spray water all over my laptop!

    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
    HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO
    HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE HE

  • Andy Kelly

    As a fan of The Simpsons I will quote the young genius that is Nelson Muntz:

    Ha, ha!

  • Didn’t realise I was making you miss a game Tony!! But if anyone would like to comment on how on earth to get sales volume up of Big Clothing for Big Men then this is really not the place – go to http://www.extralargeclothing.co.uk/pages.php?pageid=3 instead…all help and ideas welcome!

  • jitty

    Guys – surely the real story here from an Arsenal POV is the blatant Lyon/Ajax fix?

  • @Jitty – I’ve missed that, distracted by manchester – please explain?

  • Hi Tony how did you see the storm coming,you said so. HA HA HA HA HE HE HE HE HI HI HI HI HA HA HA HA HO HO HO HO OH HMMMM

  • Nipuna

    In Arsenal’s first season in the CL (98-99), we came third in a group featuring the almighty Kiev, Lens and Panathinaikos.

    Also, which one is better?

    16 seasons in CL knockout round but 0 titles

    OR

    13 seasons in CL knockout round and 2 titles

  • I must say that Lyon result has been overshadowed by the Manchester games, and I only half picked up on it this morning. Am I right in thinking that Lyon needed to win 7-0 to go through, and they won 7-0. Can that be right?

    Lyon, of course you will know, are managed by Remi Garde, our old mate, who on the Arsenal History site we have suggested might be a contender to be manager of Arsenal when the Lord Wenger departs.

  • Abhishek Kumar

    Please read this article before it is gone… Also see the video and the defending and celebrations both look pathetic..

    http://sports.yahoo.com/soccer/blog/dirty-tackle/post/Lyon-score-seven-goals-in-30-minutes-to-advance-?urn=sow-wp7277

  • Abhishek Kumar

    Dianamo coach has also been fired.. so there is definitely something wrong..

  • walter

    Oh damned Tony these lyrics are much too difficult for me. 🙂 🙂

    But I will try

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

    Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

    Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

  • walter

    Just wondering how do some of you get that picture in their avatar?

  • walter

    I think I missed an ha somewhere…

  • Mahdain

    @walter me too…care to tell tony?

  • gooner

    but the blog i read now tells the misfortune a humorous way please read it
    http://www.arsenalview.blogspot.com

  • Dogface, can you answer the Avatar question. I did it by searching on Google, but can’t remember what I did. You are the intelligent one – can you help?

  • I have just reset the time to UK time. Sorry have to do it manually and I forgot in October when the clocks changed. Just seeing if it worked…

  • steww

    This is where I did mine
    http://en.gravatar.com/
    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ho

  • walter

    Thanks all and specially Steww for the link. After a zillion attempts I managed to get it on…

    Look we’ve got an Arsenal player visiting now 😉

  • Shard

    @Dogface

    Regarding the SAF question time and in the spirit of today’s blog.

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

    Oh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he he he he he

    Ha ha ha ha ha ho ho ho ho ha ha ha ha ha

  • Shard

    @Walter

    Maybe I am completely wrong about this, but I think what we saw yesterday was the importance of the little things that referees do or don’t do in a game. The referee in this match didn’t reward ManU’s usual antics and cheating. As a result they kept having to concentrate on defending as well, thereby not allowing them an unfair dominance. As a result they struggled and seemed short of ideas. That was my impression anyway.

  • dan

    Listening to Talkshit Andy Grey and his hairy pal making up excuses for Rooney, claiming his miss was due to a tiny flick on by the defender. Watched it again cant see no touch from the defender.

  • marcus

    The defining oment of the match was Vidic elbowing the attacker behind him in the mouth….complete accident of course…

    only problem was the attacker was Smalling…

    His EPL antics don’t quite have the same gloss in Europe

  • Damien Luu

    I’m from Vietnam, guys. Yep, that’s right, in this tiny Far East corner of the world. And we also have a little funny story about Arsenal’s reputation. Arsenal IS the ONLY club in the whole world that has its private programme on TV here. The Arsenal World. Yeah, there are not The Chelsea World, The MU World, The Man C World, etc., only The Arsenal World.

    You must think that people here love our club. And it’s true. I believe that right now there are more Gooners in VN (although they may not even know about that name) than ever, and more than MU fans, Chelsea fans, or Man C fans. I must say that’s partly thanks to the nice job of a gentleman who is the (officially) richest guy in the country, and the owner of Hoang Anh Gia Lai football club, one of Arsenal’s partner-clubs. Yeah, you may have seen the (ugly) “Hoang Anh Gia Lai Viet Nam” banner at Emirates! English top clubs are our favourites, so don’t mind to mention Barca or Real or AC Milan. That means I believe Arsenal is the most beloved club in my country 🙂

    The commentators on TV have very different ideas, though. They are mostly Man U fans, from the days EPL broadcasting was fresh new to Vietnamese people, which was around 1995-1996 I believe. They are really annoying in Arsenal games that sometimes I have to mute my TV, sacrificing the background sounds. Those clowns don’t know a d*mn thing about Arsenal, and they talk like they know everything, in critical tone of course. But hey, does that sound familiar?

    The press are totally crap, only interested in transfer rumours and nothing else. I almost never read any Arsenal “news” in the newspapers here.

  • Damien Luu

    Boy, I meant to write my comment in the “On a Quest for Well Written News”, not here. Sorry guys.

  • Gord

    @Damien Luu
    Perhaps you could submit a list of places to look for news in Vietnam on the Quest article thread? As I mentioned there in response to someone from Australia, Google News is doing me favours by knowing my IP is from Canada. Looking through 1000 headlines to find a handful takes a while.

    In terms of betting, the only thing I see is that UEFA doesn’t think there was anything odd about the Lyon betting, and is _not_ investigating. I gather the French (ARJEL ?) do think something was strange, and _are_ investigating. And it seems Wilshere and perhaps another player or two for Arsenal _are_ going to get investigated by UEFA over some twits on twitter they made, about betting that Frimpong was going to score.

  • WalterBroeckx

    Djeezes I have followed that banter twitters between Jack, Frimpong and Szcesny (I think) a bit…
    If uefa really think they should investigate some openly banter and fun between two players in London and one who was going to play…

    If I remember correct Jack said something like: “150/1 for Frimpong to score the goal should I place a bet?”
    Szczesny said something about Frimpong not scoring in a joking way
    And Frimpong answered something like: what is the bet for me to make a tackle?

    Yeah…. this needs some further examination I would say.. They should be excecuted in the Tower in London at noon…

    Meanwhile a team scores 7 goals, just the number they needed, in 30 minutes and all is well according to uefa…

  • mike collins

    Tony
    How could you hit a team when it is down? On second thoughts why not.

  • Mike – it is interesting that this silly little bit of banter (which was what I meant it to be) has brought in some amazing vitriol from readers, who although declaring themselves for Arsenal, seem to be talking up Man U’s achievements.

    We don’t publish these, not (as they like to believe) because we disagree with them, but rather because the invariably contain levels of abuse that are really going too far.

    Oh and that usual stuff about “this is the worst article I have ever read”.

    But there was one, which asked what gave me the right to criticise Man U. Which I thought was rather interesting. I must ponder that.

  • mike collins

    Tony

    As you probably know by now I have no problems admiring other teams and their great players. But like you I have no idea why so many people take so many views which on the face of it do not support their side. Until 6 years ago when I left for North America I was a season ticket holder having seen my first Arsenal match at the age of 13. Like you I have seen more downs than ups but also like you it is nice to glory in the ups at the expense of rivals. I have a recent friend in our local library who is a died in the wool Spurs fan and we both agree we are afflicted by some kind of viral madness which bolts us on to our team no matter what.
    Enjoy and glory in our small victories as huge disappointments must surely lurk around the corner. Also for some peculiar reason I think AW knows more about football than I do (no idea why).
    Keep churning out that economic stuff as I love it.

    Mike C

  • rusty

    I caught a tape-delayed re-airing of the Man U game, and the ending felt fairly loosely refereed to me… fortunately, the UEFA ref showed a little more spine than his counterparts in the PL, only allowing an extra extra minute of extra time (Basel’s coach was twitching and pointing to his watch for the duration), signaling advantage for fouls against Basel defenders but then returning to the foul when they lost the ball, etc.

  • @Tony – that was from a permenent resident of LeGroan who repeatedly whips up the hate and ‘talks up’ how shite Untold is in their comments section… it was as much for that as the abuse that I trashed his comments.

    We get it – you hate us/we hate you – lets just agree to differ eh?

  • Dogface, hope you appreciate I wasn’t in any way criticising your moderation techniques – the fact that you do so much of it is a real bonus to me. I agree – people who just cover their comments in abuse without any argument or humour are not worthy of publication.

  • iniez

    Both manchester clubs are out, lyon win a controversial game..but this is what the daily mail thinks is important http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2071587/Andy-Carroll-kisses-Lukasz-Fabianski-FIFA-12.html?ITO=1490

  • Anne

    @Iniez & Shard:

    Thanks, both of those had me laughing.

  • Anne

    I completely missed that bizarre Lyon result. Lucky for them that it happened on the same day that both Manchester clubs went out. Or was it luck? Very strange.

  • Anne

    Looks like the Lyon result is getting some coverage, though. Whoever thought that we would see the Mirror mention match fixing in a headline?

    Video: Does this wink prove Dinamo Zagreb vs Lyon was fixed?

    Excerpt:

    “As well as the result, suspicions were also raised when Dinamo Zagreb’s Domagoj Vida was caught on camera winking and giving the thumbs up to Gomis after Lisandro Lopez scored Lyon’s fifth goal (see the video below).”

    Winking and giving the thumbs up?! well, I’d say that’s suspicious…

  • Ugandan Goon

    Seriously guys, it is all well and good laughing now, but spare a thought for very rich players like clichy, nasri, aguero and the like who left clubs like arsenal to dine at the top table of european football. how must they feel?
    And while your’e at it there were some in the press who even went as far as announcing the demise of arsenal football club, premature ejaculators to a man, I humbly put it to you that if a man is repeatedly proved wrong and foolish in his pronouncements, does that give all and sundry to guffaw at his folly?
    i am flesh and blood like all here and i will admit to having caught myself bursting into song, skipping a step here and there during the past 20 or so hours, but i merey put it down to my approaching Christmas bonus, oh it has come early, boys, it has!
    trebles all round, gooners! trebles all round.

  • Ugandan Goon

    @Dogface,
    @Nipuna – http://www.channel5.com/,
    Tidy!

  • Gooner Gal

    In addition to Jens, verdict of Man C in the Guardian, I must admit, I enjoyed reading this article.
    http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard-sport/football/article-24019319-manchester-uniteds-weaknesses-just-in-goal-defence-midfield-and-attack.do
    I asked the question back to some Manc fans, if they thought they would still be in the CL if they had bought Parker, Samba, Cahill, Barton and Doyle? As they had argued that Wenger was mad not to by them earlier…well you can imagine the brief reply.

    Man U like Sunderland bought early on in the transfer window and were lauded for it. Arsenal on the other hand had a sustained hate campaign against it and was widely condemned and laughed at for not going on a crazed spree, moment after the transfer window opened. It is very interesting how things have unfolded.

    I do think a daring journalist should write an article asking searching questions of Ferguson. He doesn’t have the ability to turn coal into diamonds, he has in the past had some fantastic assistant managers beside him – who have been unsung contributers to his haul of silverware. In Mike Phelan he has a yes man, but I am not sure what else. He can no longer simply open a cheque book to buy who ever he want, he has to balance the books in a way that he is unaccustomed too – but Wenger has done for years (and with a lot of humility).

    Last year I was incensed by the manner in which Man U won the league, with unbelievable own goals, inexplicable refereeing decisions, FA assistance as well as that from his former player turned manager underlings and associates like Alladyce. The media refused to acknowledge how poor the team obviously was and stuck to the script even though it was not good for the EPL in general.

    The event’s yesterday should force some to eat humble pie, but I do doubt it very much as they have taken an entrenched position to criticise Arsenal at every turn. So days like Wednesday gone, are those to enjoy.

  • bjtgooner

    I don’t like to see any player injured, but there was some poetic justice when Vidic injured himself as he wrestled an opponent to the canvass (sorry I meant grass).

    @Gooner Gal
    I agree Man U did not deserve to win the league last year, they certainly did seem to benefit from some strange ref decisions. This glossed over the weaknesses in their team and I suspect they are no stronger this year, despite some loudly lauded signings. If we can put out anything like our first team against them I would expext to win – but of course, there is always the random decision making of the “man in black” to contend with!

  • Gooner Gal

    @bjtgooner, Vidic’s injury looked nasty, so that is one of the few things I didn’t take joy from. I am glad it was self inflicted though as Basle would of been villified if their player had injured a Man U one and would of been the scapegoat for win.

    I have maintained for some time that far from being the best defender in the league as Alan Hanson said on MotD recently, I think he is rash and often out of control. I have seen far too many handballs not given against him, penalties and dangerous tackles on others to consider him the way others do. The fact that he is given such leeway does make him effective as there aren’t many others that can play like he does and get away with it. David Luiz gets pulled up for the stuff I have seen Vidic do.

    I have heard a rumour that it’s Howard Webb this W/E who will no doubt be very angry with the Man U exit and we might just bare the brunt of his rage. Wenger and Arsenal always brings out the worst in him so I am a bit nervous going into this game for so many reasons which shouldn’t even factor into it.

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Nice one Tony , and you guys and gals .Thanks for the funny links and posts – made my day.
    Like many I took that 8-2 defeat (and subsequent taunts) on the chin,so we are entitled to grin ,giggle or guffaw as we so please.
    I do hope that that kissing thingy catches on..in ladies football -I’m into that kind of stuff !Only joshing – I think !
    Herr Septic Bladder would love it as it would surely attract more men (and maybe more women !)to watch .
    I would like to implant that shock device in Platini’s privates (ans Blatter’s)and sell the remotes worldwide to fans ,so that they can “register” they displeasure directly.They being stubborn about goalline technology.

  • Woolwich Peripatetic

    I might have said it before but Rooney would look a lot a happier playing in front of our midfield. Most of his on field troubles seem to start when he’s denied decent service of ball to feet rather than aimless punts into space.

  • Stuart

    q. What’s blue and still fits?

    a. A Man City fans old Chelsea shirt!

  • Stuart

    David Cameron is heading to Manchester today, to try and find a way out of Europe!

  • WalterBroeckx

    I copied this from the facebook page of the RedAction Gooners.
    Loved it and enjoy…. Sing along on the tune of Mambo nr 5

    A little bit of Tevez out the door.
    A little bit of Vidic on the floor.
    A little a bit of Nasri on the side.
    A little bit of Rooney shooting wide.
    A little bit of Mario having a laugh.
    A little bit of Nani on his arse…
    Ladies and Gentleman – Channel Number Five.

  • Rhys Jaggar

    Far better to just keep quiet and then get a result at the Etihad Stadium, eh?

    I believe Arsenal go on and on about’doing things the right way’.

    Well, start doing things the right way………..sneering at others’ misfortune is unnecessary and has little, if any, class.