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Untold Psychology: Why doing something is good for you

The Result of Doing Something

By Dave C

The constant attacks from naysayers is invariably the result of someone actually doing something.

In such circumstances, when something is done, people come from far and wide to criticize, because they have a void to fill.  They think they know more than you. They think they can do better.

But in reality, they are miserable and criticize because they know, deep down inside, that they don’t have the guts to get up and do something themselves.

How do I know this? Because I have been there, and once in a while, I still do go back there.   We all go there at times.

Imagine you get out of school and go to work for a company doing manual labour. You arrive in the morning and leave in the afternoon simply punching in and punching out. I’ve done it for over a decade and admit physical labour can be quite difficult.

Now imagine a football manager making decisions that result in a large fan base criticizing every move, after the result of that move is seen. While it’s not physically as hard as the aforementioned physical labour, it can be so stressful that it tears you apart from the inside.   (Which incidentally is why Presidents and Prime Ministers look so much older when they leave public office.)

As I say, I worked in a job doing physical labour for over a decade then decided to go back to school (while still working) to become a screenplay writer.  And I thought, “this is easy.” I sit at a desk and write/type away and rarely experience the back and neck pain that was part and parcel of the previous job.

One day, I showed a screenplay that I’ve been working on for over a year to a group of peers. It was (they thought) terrible. The message wasn’t clear. It was convoluted. There was too much or too little ambiguity.

And the worst part about their criticism was that everything they said was correct. That’s a hard thing to hear when you believe in what you are trying to accomplish. Writing was much harder than I initially thought.

This sent me into a downward spiral until I realized that none of them were really putting themselves out there. They were simply too busy criticizing to improve their own ability levels as writers. The ones who are truly good aren’t naturally gifted as one might assume, but they have the ability to continue opening themselves up to criticism because it makes them better at what they do.

This applies to any high profile position. Think of the manager, the coaches, the players, and the writers of Untold Arsenal who continually open themselves up to criticism on a regular basis. They are actually DOING something.

To those who write in and endlessly criticise the articles on Untold, I would say, if you allow yourself to be honest, you might discover why you’re being so critical and why it means so much to you for Arsenal to win a trophy.

And then you might ask, is it really for the club, or is it just good for you? Does it really make your life better? What happens when we actually win a trophy? What will you do then? Will you ask yourself, what now?

Most importantly. Why do you care so much that you have to flood a blog’s comment section with hatred and spite? Does it make you feel better? Do you want others to be miserable like you? And again I would ask, “What happens when we actually win a trophy?”  What will you do then? Will you ask yourself, what now?  Or maybe just complain because we didn’t win two.

The books…

The sites from the same team…

51 comments to Untold Psychology: Why doing something is good for you

  • ClockEndRider

    Hear, hear.
    Far easier to win a title on Championship Manager and extrapolate from that that you have an earthly about the real football world than genuinely get out into the world and try to make a difference in any sphere.
    Just one reason why certain blogs are to be avoided at all costs. Just homes for the terminally inadequate.

  • para

    Good points, except
    “Which incidentally is why Presidents and Prime Ministers look so much older when they leave public office”
    as they do not actually give a damm about what people are saying once elected.

  • Matt

    We know this blog takes a different slant to others just to get the hits and comments, so why are you complaining?

    A lot of people do go to far with their complaining and moaning but this site does the exact opposite and is far to delighted and excited by descisions that are clearly bad.

    If the site had a more realistic view of things i am sure the posters comment would be more realistic.

  • Mickey Finn

    Matt,
    ‘just to get hits and comments’? What do you know about why this blog takes a different slant to other blogs? Maybe the writers just feel fed up with the constant whining and anti-support. I know I find a constructive and positive approach refreshing. And if the positivity sometimes goes a bit over the top and the glasses are a shade too rosy, that’s only what one would expect from the supporters of a football club, isn’t it?

  • I agree with Mickey Finn. I value this site for its positivity. As a matter of fact I think that this site is realistic, but if by “a more realistic view of things” you mean more pessimistic then there are plenty of other sites for you to choose from, Matt; in fact, I’d say that your cup runneth over.

  • Philbet

    Clearly Matt is some sort of wind up merchant, an answer that so went to the core of the writers notion would be very difficult to be genuine,if it is, then Matt is the ‘classic’ case of opinion without responsibility !!
    I wonder if he has ever done anything worthwhile in his whole life.

  • chibyke

    a quick question to dave c and co. is untold blog,the parent you would like to be to your children?never admitting their mistakes,always bringing out the positives in thier shortcomings?(yes my child you came fourth in your class, but on a positive note,others failed)what about the person that came first?) we are not saying be harsh in criticism. it seems however that untold have sworn to NEVER, EVER admit the shortcomings of this team.(you normally slightly graze through them on your way to pointing out the positives). win or lose, everyone looks forward to the next season(thats what happens after we win by the way!) but the feel good factor when the season ends and the wonderful attitude going into a new season on the back of winning a trophy in the previous season is one which i am sure will do a look of good to everyone,supporters,club players,manager,untold bloggers! dont you want it? cause it sounds like you dont! it sounds as if you revel in belonging to the “exalted” group of supporters who derive pleasure in supporting a club that “almost got there” every season.

  • Mick

    @Matt
    Don’t judge others by your own shallow, dubious standards.

  • Dec

    @chibyke
    Straight answer to your question to Dave, ABSOLUTELY.
    That’s exactly the kind of parent I’d want and try to be to my child.
    So he came fourth, did he/she do their best ? If so, well done let’s celebrate that.
    Either way, should I support the child always and unconditionally? Absolutely yes.
    Can I help the child improve? (Need to define success here, it’s not always just about coming first on the day) . I can be of infinitely more help if I encourage and positively support rather than being critical and negative. The ‘Win everything at all costs’ mentality is just pure macho BS.
    It isn’t possible in any sphere (either with individuals or with a football club). To know your values and then be true to them is far more important.
    In Arsene Wenger we have a ‘parent’ who knows what’s best for the club and sees the bigger picture including the current limitations in comparison to some of the opposition. As a result Arsenal are a better and stronger club than most and certainly superior in ways that count to our ‘nouveau riche’ opponents. Untold, in my opinion, reflects his desire to build the club on a solid base rather than following the whims of popular (and usually uninformed) opinion.
    Allez Le Boss and Untold Arsenal.

  • Matt

    The keyboard warriors are out again mouthing off behind there computer screens, tough guys!!

    My opinions are as valid as any of yours just because you dont like them doesn’t make you right and me wrong.

    Constant whining by lots of fans Mickey? Maybe they have something to whine about, have you ever thought about that?

    What do you know about why they do write the blog in the way they do?

  • nicky

    @Dave C,
    There is little doubt that Presidents and Prime Ministers look so much older when they leave office.
    However, NONE in my opinion look as haggard as football managers. That job, whether successful or not must be one of the most stressful in the world of employment.

  • Matt,

    Yes of course you are entitled to your opinions. Since you expressed them, I don’t see why you get offended that some take issue with you. Seems it’s OK for you to make remarks about others, but not for others to return the compliment.

    It’s not obligatory to post here. If you don’t like the heat, stay out of the kitchen, as they say on Masterchef.

  • Stuart

    Chibyke
    That’s exactly where it’s lost on you, and thousands of others I might add. You wrote ” it seems however that untold have sworn to NEVER, EVER admit the shortcomings of this team”
    The fact is this team’s weaknesses are discussed on here but it’s not something people go on about and write massive articles slagging players off and blowing things out of proportion as critisism is not support.

  • Sam

    Newspapers are going to have to find a way to start printing their negative articles about Arsenal on the AAA’s noses given how shortsighted they all seem. When will these ‘fans’ learn that all clubs go through a period of one play, one game, one season, and yes many seasons sometimes without the success that their fans want? I agree 100% with Stuart – Untold is not blind to the strengths and weaknesses of the team. They are simply on the other end of the spectrum compared to most blogs out there today (i.e. positive instead of negative), and for it people like Matt and Chibyke come on here and criticize them.

    Again, it all comes around to your ability to put things in perspective. All you’d have to do is go back a few weeks and you can find Arsenal blogs ripping on rosicky, fabianski, koscielny etc. for not being good enough players, and yet here we are in the midst of a great end of season run, in large part because of these players, and the negative end of the spectrum, instead of getting behind the team just reverts the conversation back to other shortcomings on the team or the lack of a trophy this year.

    Trophies are not won with support that comes and goes or fair weather fans. They are won over many years of constant, positive support from everyone tied to the club; board, managers, players, family, friends, and fans. For the last few years, it’s been one group, and one group only, that consistently is inconsistent in their support – the AAA and other ‘fans’. It’s like flavor of the week; Song isn’t good enough says some fans, then when he good enough, mertesacker or ramsey is the new scapegoat. But if they start playing well and we are winning, then it’s just the same thing and on to the next player we can attack.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Brilliant! So much easier to be negative than active and positive. I have had some bad times myself with our performances this year but constant slating self harming and depression does nothing. Unless this owner does something stupid out future is very bright and that is worth remembering, hell we even beat a seriously biased ref at the weekend.

  • Florian

    The trait that makes a difference among people is how they react when things aren’t going their way. Some sit breaking their hands and moaning about how tough life is. The others are accepting the reality and start doing something to turn things around. You know for yourself which category you’re fitting in.

  • Mick

    @Matt
    And you lead the way where ‘keyboard warriors’ are concerned.
    You also lead the way as far as ‘whining’ is concerned.
    I do not normally slag others off but you are a total arse.

  • Domhuail

    Matt…..Here are a few questions I have for you in order to clarify and enlighten us:

    1) ¨just to get the hits and comments¨….could you explain to me, from your privileged position of ¨superior blogger¨ why Walter and Tony would spend a vast portion of their spare time working to dispel the veil of secrecy behind the referees and the other football authorities, instead of being with their families…..just for a few hits and comments? Maybe they’re narcissists like you or glory-hounds like the AAA? By the way, what would a website blog be for if not to get the occasional hit or comment?

    2)¨descisions that are clearly bad¨…please do specify which decisions you are writing about. Also, explain why this site is so open to intelligent and reasoned criticism of the Arsenal and its ancillary elements and encourages open, respectful discussions even if they go against what UA’s authors and posters present. the only time a blogger is sanctioned is when he or she insults or disrespects others.

    3)¨ comment would be more realistic¨…..maybe we could start with your comments being more ¨realistic¨? What is, in your omniscient opinion, a more realistic view of things? Would it, by any chance, coincide with or mirror LeGrove’s vitriolic and anti-Arsenal views?

    Finally, you do need to return to adult education (assuming you are an adult…a risky assumption I know) for a refresher course to improve your spelling,syntax and grammar….here are a few examples:

    to far…..TOO far,
    far to…..far TOO,
    i………..I
    posters…..poster’s or posters’
    comment ….comments

    Try spell and grammar check next time. Hope this helps!

  • Dave C

    Thanks for the feedback regardless of the negative and positive. This piece is an existentialist view on fandom, which essentially is about questioning one’s own motives and actions. If the message wasn’t clear, my apologies. I’ll do my best to improve.

  • Dave C

    By the way, I’m a big fan of Domhuail’s comments. I’ve been an avid reader of the site for a few years and always love his commentary.

  • ARSENAL 13

    @ Dave C,

    Nice one. You punched a few where it hurts the most…..OUCHhh..

  • Sav from Australia

    Brilliant article Mr Dave C!

    Matt
    April 9, 2013 at 5:26 pm

    Ahahaha. Mr Keyboard Warrior, say that to someone’s face in a bar, not the internet.

    And serious, you must be ignorant or a wind up merchant if you say this: “What do you know about why they do write the blog in the way they do?”

    Tony and Walter constantly explain why they write what they write. Your opinions are not valid just because you have them. They are only valid if they make sense.

  • WalterBroeckx

    I must say that this is an excellent article and some great comments (even the negative ones) that made me think about what I do. And it touched me also a bit.

    I thank you Mr. Dave C. Really do. It gave me a bit of a better insight in what I do. It’s always good to have someone talking about what you do from the outside. A bit like my West Ham supporter article in fact. 😉

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Another one hits the fence ,Dom ! Another big LIKE from me. Is it only me ,or are the arseholes multiplying unchecked ?
    We should all learn to take it easy and not sweat the unimportant stuff .
    Have a laugh with this item called ,” As I mature .”

    I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you .All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in !

    I’ve learned that no matter how much I care , some people are just arseholes !

    I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion ,not proof ,to destroy it.

    I’ve learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you better have a big willy or huge boobs !

    I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare youself to others- they are more screwed up than you think !

    I’ve learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you’re finished !

    I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do ,unless we are celebrities !

    I’ve learned that regardless of how and steamy a relationship is at first ,the passion fades and there better
    be a lot of money to take its place !

    I ‘ve learned that 99% of the time, when something isn’t working in your house , one of your kids did it !

    I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon , and the less important ones just never go away !
    The end .

    Many of the naysayers and the doom & gloom posters who infest here just about ticked all of the above boxes !

  • Mick

    Maybe people like Matt see themselves as missionaries, sent by their AAA masters to convert us heathen mob to their true faith. Only to find that we the unconverted are in fact more civilized, better educated and more enlightened than they are ever likely to be. It must be very disconcerting for them. They come and they go and hopefully Matt will be the same, just like Rupert.

  • WalterBroeckx

    Matt reminds me of an old working colleague.
    Each lunchtime he opened his box and got out his sandwiches and said in a moaning way: “cheese, always cheese”.
    The first day I didn’t take notice of this. But after a few days I started to get a bit intrigued.
    Each day again he opened his lunch box, looked at his sandwiches and said: “cheese, always cheese”

    After a few weeks I said to him: In stead of always moaning about the cheese between your sandwiches you should tell your wife that you want something else for your lunch.

    And then he replied: I don’t have a wife, I make my own sandwiches.

  • Matt

    Mick

    You seen obsessed by me for some reason, glad i give you a reason to live and hate.

    I couldn’t give a monkeys what you lot believe but cant stand bullshitters and hyperbole which this site is full of IMO.

  • Matt

    Dont like Cheese Walter.

  • Mick

    So of your own free will you regularly come on this site which you regard as full of bullshit and hyperbole. What a strange person you must be.

  • Mick

    Above for the attention of Matt.

  • Matt

    Coming from somebody who verbally abuses people he doesn’t even know from behind a computer screen.You must be kidding.

  • Rupert Cook

    @Dom, interesting how defensive some of you get when people dare doubt the direction the club is going. I have no idea where it’s going, I’ve given up guessing. I’m sure we’ll all be positive if we clinch fourth as that’s about as much as we can achieve due to corrupt refs and all the best players being bought by Chelsea, City and Manu.

    Dom, your point 2 is fascinating. I’ve been insulted and disrespected by several on here and yet I don’t think any of them have been sanctioned. If this was a football game I’d believe there’s some bad refereeing going on.

  • Mickey Finn

    Everyone is entitled to an opinion but that doesn’t mean all opinions are worth the same.

  • Stuart

    Mick, you spoke too soon.

  • Stuart

    Matt,
    You’re a bit messed up, why don’t you take your anger elsewhere rather than constantly returning to something you don’t like.

  • Matt

    I have posted here 20 times at most and thought the idea of these sites to provoke debate from differnet view points.

    If you just want it to be a site where we sing the clubs praises and believe anybody who doesn’t agree is an idiot and to be verbally attacked, make it a members club.

  • WalterBroeckx

    Matt,
    I think you posted some 40 comments and I can’t remember any comment that had much good to say about anything in regards to Arsenal.

  • Matt

    Fair enough, i dont have much positive to say about the club at the moment so you are probably correct on that point also.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    Some of our visitors accuse us of abusing them. I would disagree (perhaps we disabuse them of their negative beliefs).
    We don’t ambush anyone by pretending to be something we aren’t. We are what it says on the tin – supporters of the club, the team and the manager.

    So, our sad visitors, if you believe you’ve wandered into a Monty Python skit and are being abused…please be as big as M and just leave.

    Q: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
    M: Well, I was told outside that…
    Q: Don’t give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!
    M: What?
    Q: Shut your festering gob, you tit! Your type really makes me puke, you vacuous, coffee-nosed, maloderous, pervert!!!
    M: Look, I CAME HERE FOR AN ARGUMENT, I’m not going to just stand…!!
    Q: OH, oh I’m sorry, but this is abuse.
    M: Oh, I see, well, that explains it.
    Q: Ah yes, you want room 12A, Just along the corridor.
    M: Oh, Thank you very much. Sorry.
    Q: Not at all.
    M: Thank You.
    (Under his breath) Stupid git!!

  • Matt

    GoingGoingGooner looks familiar. Do you post on Afterhours?

  • Ben L

    Matt you find the site is full of bullshit and hyperbole but you still post here. Why is that? You should have gone after 5 visits at most.

    If it is that bad, what you say won’t change what they write which explains why you haven’t posted anything sensible or realistic.

  • jax

    GoingGoingGooner. JHC! What are you on?

  • Stuart

    But Matt, you need to open your eyes and your mind, there is so much positive at Arsenal, just not the things you recognise which I bet is only a trophy. So many clubs are going through a boom and bust type scenario as far as league table / cup success is concerned and Arsenal have been consistent throughout this.

  • Stuart

    GoingGoingGooner
    He’s not the Messiah, he’s a very naughty boy!

  • A. Stewart

    Why is it so important to write an anecdotal based diatribe essentially criticizing others for a different opinion, which ironically is exactly the same as UA accused the so-called AAA of doing…

    In the real world, people can have different views and still support the same entity and want what’s best for it, even if they disagree on how to get there..

    Big deal some people are more positive and some are more negative, one person’s realism is another person’s being unrealistic…newsflash, in this case they all support ARsenal Football CLub, which is bigger than any one individual, be it the manager, owner, players whatever.

    This blog is in the public sphere, obviously not everyone is going to agree on everything….welcome to life.

  • Matt Clarke

    A.Stewart,
    I was wondering…
    If I criticise you for criticising them for criticising him for criticising the article… will you criticise me?
    Maybe I’ll do nothing and stay out of trouble.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    @Matt yep, I post on After Hours but not as much as I used to as there are a number of guys on the site that are extremely negative and they have taken over the site. Been on the site for 8 (?) years and it has deteriorated.

    @jax not on anything just saying that you gotta look on the bright side of life…have a little larf once in a while even if our team is not exactly where we want it to be.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    @Stuart

    BRIAN: You’re all different!

    FOLLOWERS: Yes, we are all different!

    DENNIS: I’m not.

    🙂

  • Stuart

    ha ha yes GoingGingGooner,
    Q: Are you the Judean peoples front?
    A: F@ck off!!!!!! We’re the peoples front of Judeah!

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Nice and funny goings on here – just luv it !Reminds me of an old joke .
    A country bumpkin ( or it may have been a yokel or a redneck)
    once took a shine to an attractive goat ,and anounced to his wife that from that day forth it will be sleeping with them on their marital bed .
    The indignant wife asks him, “What about the smell ?”
    ” It’ll get used to it , just as I did !”, he replied .
    AHHH ! Sweet !

  • chibyke

    it is worthy of mention however that we are presently seeing a new team after that away win to bayern munich. (and NO am not saying this because they have been winning).honestly i would have taken a draw after the red card. but something has visibly changed( maybe the dropping of verm and sceszzzz made others sit up!) that “sumtin” is what we have been clamouring from this team for a while now. i persist with my position that this team could should have done better but didnt and i am vocal about it.