By Sir Hardley Anyone, Dept of the Weird, University of Certain Things at Enfield.
What a strange day – all the weird and wonderful piling up at once. Of course some of these stories broke yesterday and some the day before but it feels like they are all swimming around in a sea of football mush.
Just look at the news. Arsenal have made their first signing of the summer, but actually it is their second signing (don’t tell the Daily Telegraph – sports newspaper of the year) however – they hate it when we laugh at them.
But let’s leave that for a moment. We also have Man U on red alert, and that is not in some blog run by a kid who cons people into link clicking to make his 1p a throw but in the Guardian. And Ireland players were paid $$$$$ not to hurt Messi in an international, apparently – although that one is denied.
Poor Podolski says he made a mistake in going to Italy – although not all of Italy, just one particular club, Russia are trying to get rid of Capello now Usmanov has paid off his salary arrears (how do you bribe your way into a world cup when a) you can’t afford your own computers and b) you can’t afford your manager), Arry is threatening to return, and Gerrard is haunted by not winning the title.
Not a bad haul.
But let’s have a look at Little Liverpool, whose ex captain is haunted by the fact that he played football for years and years and every year told us they were going to win the league, and they never ever did. He won the Champs League for goodness sake, and lots of league cups as I recall, and you’d think he might be satisfied, but apparently not. He’s whining about not winning the league.