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October 2016
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Arsenal’s shock fixture change leaves fans confused. AST demand Wenger’s resignation.

By Bulldog Drummond
Now with added betting odds – see end of article!
[I think I should explain that it is the article that has the betting odds, not our regular pre-match correspondent! – Tony]
Fans who thought the transfer window was shocking enough have been outraged to find that the Arsenal v Stoke fixture has been moved to Saturday at 3pm.
I spoke to our resident historian, Professor Billy “the Dog” McGraw at the University of Certain Things, and he confirmed that in a statute laid down by Parliament in 1543 it was agreed that Arsenal do not play games on a saturday at 3pm.   “It is a time for sitting at home and watching SkyOoze and BT Sprout,” said the Prof, “not for trotting the countryside looking for football.  Always has been and always will be.”
This is in fact believed to be the first time that Arsenal has been forced to play a match at the same time as Norwich v Bournemouth and quite honestly one wonders about these so called “officials” who run the Premier whatnot.

“I mean we now have an international centre forward crisis apparently [shouldn’t that be allegedly? Tony] [one more comment like that and I’ll set the Prof on you – Bulldog] with Man U resorting to bringing in a Field Martial.

(Ho ho I think is the comment at this point if you wouldn’t mind).

According to Mr Wenger, “The strikers are South American today. Europe doesn’t produce strikers any more.”

Which really makes one wonder why the British government are so keen on new industrial relations legislation.  But I diversify.

“You look at countries like Germany, who played in Scotland or against Poland with Mario Götze up front – he’s a creative midfielder. I don’t think it’s because they do not want to play with a typical striker but they haven’t got one who’s really convincing at the top level,”  said Mr W, and that I think should shut up the whingers and moaners, but I don’t think it will.

Mr Wenger then backed the call made on Untold a earlier this week (good to see his advisers are still with us!) commenting positively on the way that top teams can play their reserves in division 3 in France before adding, “I think Giroud, Walcott, Sánchez can get around 20 goals without any problem. Sometimes you have to trust your players and play them….I played Anelka and people asked me: ‘Why did you not buy anybody?’ Thierry Henry the same. I said: ‘Let him play, maybe he will score’.’”

On the injury front Jack Wilshere got the report,  “He is progressing slowly.”   Laurent Koscielny is back and has a youth transplant ahead of his birthday, saying he is feeling young at 30 and is training hard.

Here’s the team


Bellerin Koscielny Gabriel Monreal

Cozorla Coquelin

Ramsey Ozil Alexis


On the beach, lazing in the late summer sun, one or more of….

Ospina, Campbell, Debuchy, Chambers, Mert, Gibbs, Arteta, Flamini, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Walcott

Meanwhile I have heard the passing headless chickens talking about the Arsenal Injury Crisis as if we are back to the Bad Old Days.   Actually we aren’t.  Here’s the injury table:
  • Crystal Palace: 9
  • Aston Villa and Everton: 7 each
  • Man City: 6
  • Stoke, Liverpool, Newcastle, West Ham, Southampton, Bournemouth: 5 each
  • Arsenal, Tottenham, Sunderland: 3 each
  • Chelsea, Leicester, Man U, Watford: 2 each
  • Norwich and Swansea: 1 each


Which is as good a reason as any to think that the upsurge of the Palace will drift to an end, and that Man City will soon have a stumble.

No one seems to know too much about when Jack returns, but Danny is out certainly until Christmas meaning that he will have been out for eight months at least.    Per Mertesacker has returned to training following his illness.  Tomas Rosicky also seems to be out until the new year with his knee injury.
But what, I hear you ask, of the alien hordes.  The rugby team.   The mob.   Well, in keeping with their style Ibrahim Afellay and Charlie Adam are already suspended and Glen Johnson, Mame Diouf and Marko Arnautovic have injuries of various delicate natures and the disgraceful Shawcross has gone to hell.    Jon Walters will play but the little bird who whispers all these things in my ears says Peter Odemwingie is not fit to play.
The Destroyers of Football last won at Arsenal just after Prince Charles married Princess Di, so we should be fairly safe on this one, as a rerun of royal nuptials is not anticipated this weekend.  They have lost their last 13 visits to Arsenal in league and cup.

On the other hand Stoke have drawn four of their last five away games which pretty much tells you what you need to know about their away tactics.

Stoke manager Mark Ooze sayeth thus: “We feel we are better equipped to deal with Arsenal on the road now,” so it is fortunate Arsenal are continuing with their recent policy of playing games inside the Emirates Stadium.  “Maybe teams used to fear going to the big clubs but that isn’t the case any more. They travel with the intention of causing problems,” and certainly if you have ever tried to overtake a Stoke supporter on the motorway you would agree with that.

Stoke, perhaps because they do insist on playing in the street rather than entering the ground, have not won this season.

In the extraordinarily unlikely event of Arsenal not scoring today it will be the first time the in the club’s history they have failed to score in their opening three top-division home games.  The last time we didn’t win any of our first three home games was 1959.

On the positive side however we are at the top of the league for wins in 2015, and top of the league for ball possession this season (65%).  So all we need to do is up the shot to goal ratio and we’re home and dry.

Countering this Stoke have got four points from their last seven away games, including a 1-0 defeat to WBA in the last match.

Here’s another snippet: “Arsenal are undefeated in 35 of their last 38 home matches in the Premier League.”  But we have failed to score in 5 of their last 6 home matches in the Premier League.

And so, I hear you cry, what of the odds?  Untold used to do them, but no more.  Why not?

They are

  • Arsenal to win, of course, what else did you expect: 3/10
  • It’s a draw 9/2
  • The unthinkable happens and Stoke win. 9/1.

Click here for the latest odds with thanks to Paddy Power.

Oh and keep an eye out in case the Untold Banner has been erected.


Notes: Walter is on holiday so there will not be a post match report today.  With the rest of the gang doing the usual journey from the Midlands to London for the game, and then toddling off for a dance straight after we get back, Untold resumes on Sunday morning, full of vigour, fun, and twisted ankles.



  • 12 September 1998: Arsène Wenger announced that he was looking for a new striker to replace Ian Wright, and would like to sign Emile Heskey.  He didn’t but instead used Anelka and Kanu, along with Bergkamp, as the main source of goals until Thierry Henry arrived.
  • 12 September 2009: Tomáš Rosický came on after 51 minutes v Manchester City, marking his return with a goal and an assist.  However Arsenal lost 4-2 to make it two wins and two defeats in the first four matches, scoring 13 conceding 8!

The Untold Books

60 comments to Arsenal’s shock fixture change leaves fans confused. AST demand Wenger’s resignation.

  • With there suspensions and injuries
    I can’t really see them bothering us
    Unless a frustrating draw is there sole purpose
    3-4 unanswered Goals would be most welcome .

  • SamuelAkinsolaAdebosin.

    Arsenal. Formation: 4-4-2. App Data: 4G (LTE) Starters: Sanchez Walcott. Oxlade Coquelin Cazorla Ramsey. Bellerin DeAberu Koscielny Gibbs. Cech. Bench: Ospina Arteta Rhino’ Ozil Giroud Monreal Debuchy. If the Boss wants a dazzling speed that can 4 times out speed the 3G Game App Data Running Formation Plan of: 4-2-3-1 starts, he has to use the 4G (LTE) to overrun the Potters with dazzling speed. The hard tackling Potters will be comfortable if the Gunners play on the 3G Game App Data Running Platform. The 10 man behind the ball and counter to steal a goal Potters are principally running on the 2G Game App Data Platform. And they will find it easy to deal with a Gunners’ 3G Game App Data Running Platform of: Cech. BellerinRhino’KoscielnyMonreal. CazorlaCoquelin. RamseyOzilSanchez. Giroud. In particular, Rhino’, Monreal, Ozil and Giroud can’t operate at the 4G level because they don’t have the requisite speed for it. Not that the Gunners will not beat the Potters with the 3G starts, they would. But they will struggle to do it. So, the choise is for the Boss.

  • Despite the hangover of the international break, a handsome win is probably on the cards. Let the boys use this match to lay down a marker and make a statement. I expect the Arsenal to shame those who think it can’t be done without buying. Go gunners!

  • nicky

    I trust all this over confidence about today’s game hasn’t spread to the team.
    If it HAS, we don’t want a repeat of the West Ham shambles.

  • Andrew Crawshaw

    Stoke games are never easy!


  • ARSENAL 13

    Come on gunners
    Come on gunners……

    Stuff the Stokes.

  • ARSENAL 13


  • ARSENAL 13

    Oooooo…. Come on.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    I like what I am seeing with Gabriel.

  • ARSENAL 13

    Bellerin getting stronger and stronger every game..

    What a player we have there…

  • ARSENAL 13

    That’s a strike….like a boss

  • ARSENAL 13

    That’s a yellow….

  • ARSENAL 13

    There starts the time wasting…. 27th minute!!!!

  • ARSENAL 13



  • ARSENAL 13

    Superb tackle Coquelin…peach of a pass Ozil and Theooooooooo

  • GoingGoingGooner

    what was better? Coquelin’s challenge, Oezil’s pass or Walcott’s finish?

  • Cyberian

    Coquelin’s tackle

  • ARSENAL 13

    If i had to chose the best…..Theos goal….I would say.

    Theo made a well timed run. Held the defender back and beat the goalie.

  • ARSENAL 13


  • ARSENAL 13


  • Al

    Strange officiating from moss; Ozil accidentally trips a stoke player with both players going for the ball and gets carded, Peters wraps his arms around Ramsey and not even a card..

  • GoingGoingGooner

    That was a penalty on Giroud

  • Al

    What does Giroud have to do to get a penalty??

  • GoingGoingGooner

    3 pts 🙂

  • jayramfootball

    Good solid perfromance in the midfield and at the back I thought – Coquelin was once again brilliant.
    Should have been a lot more goals though – we will need to take more chances as the season progresses. The strike force is not sharp at all.

  • jayramfootball

    Strange refereeing today though..

    Ozil book for shirt pulling in the first half – 3 free kicks conceded by Stoke in the second half for exactly the same thing. No yellows given. Then as clear a penalty as you could ever see not given. It does seem hard for these refs to give Arsenal anything.

  • bjtgooner

    From what I could see on a rather poor stream it was a fairly one sided performance, we played some delightful football, scored two good goals, possibly could have scored more and, as usual, were denied a penalty by the PGMO visually impaired official.

    But, a good win, three valuable points and – so nice to beat the Orcs and Sparky!!

  • serge

    I also had a poor (stop, start) steam, but was good enough to enjoy the game and see that we dominated. Late in the game someone said we had 25 chances ( and there were a few more after this), but only two goals to show for it. That’s a poor return and needs to be addressed.
    Still, we’re second and looking good.

  • Wow, where are the regulars,are they caught in a jam or !wish they stay away for good in their sewers.COngs guys and lets keep the spirit.

  • Mick

    We are 2nd in the table now, does that mean we are challenging?

  • Florian

    The commentators on NBC Sports mentioned that we had created 25 chances before Giroud came in. So certainly that number went to 30.

  • Andrew Crawshaw

    Wins now for the U18s, U21s and the first team. Need the Ladies to make it a full set tomorrow in their Continental Cup Quarter Zfinal v Man City. Game is at Borehamwood with a 14:00 kick off. Worth going if you can, self print tickets available on-line.


  • Brickfields Gunners

    WOO HOO , HOO ! Up the Gunners !

  • Menace

    What a game! Missed sooooo many chances. One thing was consistent was the PGMO muppet Moss(cheating MF). He allowed them to kick us & when it was severe he only spoke to them. They should have been down to 10 in the first half & then down to 9 in the second, but Moss was doing the bidding of Riley so special consideration was given to their dirty tackles. He booked Ozil for a foul that was never a booking according to the Laws. But I forgot the Laws according to Riley. The importance of our win is immeasurable as it was with 2 goals from open play. We still had a og for us but this time it was Olivier Giroud!

  • Menace

    Reading through the comments, this one is spot on
    September 12, 2015 at 4:49 pm

    That was a penalty on Giroud.’

    Giroud was being held in clear vision of Moss but selective blindness has its moments.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    An interesting ramble by that blither, Mourinho, after their match. Apparently they were simply unlucky to lose 3-1 to Everton. Everton were lucky that their substitute, Naismith came on and scored 2 goals right away…???? By that measure, Chelsea was lucky to win last year!! I get what he is trying to do – play down the poor performance/results of his team, in public to protect the players but he also commented “The result was wrong…I am the champion, the players are the champions, so we are not worried…and later…I am the best man to manage Chelsea…I have won things for Chelsea so I am the best one to know what to do…Personally, as long as he keeps playing the same back 4, teams are going to have fun playing them…Ivanovic was terrible and Terry, never very quick, is playing as in quicksand…I am looking forward to next week.

  • Gord

    Hi gang, it started raining so I am back at a computer. How did Mesut get a yellow card in the first half? His first foul of the game as near as I can see.

  • Menace

    BrummieGooner – I hope you enjoyed the match. It is a win that is special. You are special too. Be happy.

  • Menace

    Gord – it was the most undeserved card I have ever seen in 60 years of watching football. Moss just wanted to do something to show solidarity with Stoke so he carded Ozil for attempting to get the ball off a Stoke player.

  • Walter

    While the rain came pouring down near the toll station near Lyon I could have a look at the score while queueing white 2 minutes to go! Great result! Cant wait to see the match tomorrow evening

  • Andrew Crawshaw

    It was a joke of a card, I thought his first of the game and utterly innocuous. Sioux made far worse and was only spoken to. I didn’t see the off the ball incident between Gabriel and Arnautovic that left the Stoke player on the ground dying, can anyone enlighten me please?

  • Andrew Crawshaw

    Walter, there was a halftime announcement that Belgian Gooners were at the game, no surprise that we won!

  • Florian

    Andrew, there was a tussle between Gabriel and Arnautovic while running along to occupy positions in front of the Arsenal 18-yard box. Arnautovic initiated contact, Gabriel responded twice with a raised arm to protect his position, looked like a minor contact between Gabriel’s arm and Arnautovic’s shoulder/throat, Arnautovic fell down like hit by lightning. Looked like an exaggeration to me, and I think the ref was right to ignore it.

  • Gord

    Thanks Menace, Andrew.

    We had some loanees playing yesterday and today.

    Szczesny started in Roma’s win.

    Sanogo was on the pitch near the end of the game, with Ajax behind 2-1. The keeper took down Sanogo in the box, and the penalty was converted to give Ajax a tie.

    WHam play tomorrow.

    Gnabry was on the bench for WBrom, but didn’t play.

    Maitland-Niles started on the bench, came on at 66 minutes. He produced 1 shot on net, was fouled once and fouled someone else once.

    Hayden and Akpom both started for Hull. Hayden played to the 68min, generating 1 shot and 1 assist. Akpom played until the 82min, generating 2 shots and being offside twice. He was fouled 4 times, the last foul injuring him and having him be substituted. That foul recieved a yellow.

    Martinez started in goal. He gave up 2 corners, faced 5 shots and 1 of those was a goal.

    Toral started, came off in 69min. At one point he was injured in a tackle, and couldn’t shake the injury, for which he was subbed. He had 1 shot on net, had 2 assists, he committed 2 fouls, was fouled once (which got a yellow). The second foul he committed was after getting injured, resulted in him getting a yellow as well.

    Wellington played the 90, generated 1 assist and was fouled twice. He drew a penalty.

    Zelalem started and played 74min. He was fouled twice.

    Crowley didn’t feature in Barnsley’s win.

    I hope I didn’t miss anyone.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Well done. Sounds like we missed a few chances, and were denied our obligatory pen? But we did what we needed to. And it is not us making the negative headlines…..not by a long shot!
    Another bad day for the Stamford chapter of the AAA

  • Florian

    The penalty non-call was as ridiculous as can be. The replay clearly showed the Stoke RC defender pulling Giroud’s shirt. I guess the fact that it happened in the match stoppage time made it less of an issues than it could have been, but still it was an outrageous decision by any standards. Even the commentators had to point it out.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    To my mind, Giroud’s non-penalty was clearly a penalty but I must say that although he does get fouled a lot and gets dragged down, he does also play to the ref and I wonder if that is not backfiring on him.

  • GoingGoingGooner

    @Florian That was my read of the Gabriel Arnautovic, too. Arnautovic clearly ran at Gabriel to create space for his teammate on the ball and Gabriel was having none of it. It looked like a parody of an American Football blocker. He probably did make contact with the Stoke man but there is a difference between raising your arm and pushing back to maintain your position against someone who is clearly running in to you and bashing someone’s nose in which he did not do. A good no call by the ref.

  • Menace

    Andrew – I was watching the Arnautovic/Gabriel unfold. Gabriel was poked twice (looked like in the ribs)& when the third attempt came Gabriel stuck his arm out & caught his assailant in the face with his elbow. It was tough justice.

  • Menace

    Andrew = what annoyed me was the abuse & threats Arnautovic was making against Gabriel as he left the pitch. Moss was next to him & didn’t see fit to red card him (the appropriate card for that offence).

  • Josif

    If my lip-reading skills didn’t disappear, Arnautović was swearing Gabriel’s mother on Bosnian/Croatian/Serbian.

    Excellent victory today – two goals, a lot of created chances, a clean sheet.

  • Samrat Jha

    should not the pull back on Ramsey in the 66 minute have been a yellow card when Ozil was penalised for the same if not less incriminating offence

  • nicky

    I think Gabriel is turning out to be another of Arsene’s magical signings.
    No-one is going to mess with him. 😉

  • apo Armani

    My post earlier on this morning on this thread has disappeared 🙁

  • Menace

    apo Armani – this is the digital age! some things happen & other things don’t.

    When I was at the game I blamed the chips in the ball for the deviation of Alexis shooting. It makes the ball turn in strange directions! What chips? the ones that have been added for goal line technology.

  • Menace

    Josif – the choice Serbski Hervatski is what I was referring to as being red cardable (foul & abusive language).

  • Gord

    HITC was following up on the game, in particular the twits about Gabriel.

    It is nice that people are saying positive things about his performance. But why does the nice comment so often need to come with a negative comment about some other Arsenal player?

  • Gord

    Five games played, and Cazorla has successfully completed 414 passes with a 90% success rate.

    That 90% success rate, implies that Cazorla has attempted 460 passes. The actual number of passes is between 458 and 462 (otherwise the 90% would round to 89 or 91). Which suggests he is attempting 92 passes per game.

    He is completing 90% of those, or completing 82.8 passes per game (not necessarily an integer). As this is a binomial problem (completed pass or failed pass), the variance is expected to be 8.28, and the standard deviation to be about 2.9 passes per game.

    I misread the article. The 90% completion rate is just for yesterday’s game. What a person should do, is look up how many passes Cazorla attempted in every game, and how many he completed.

    Okay, going through Fixtures and Results, and allowing javascript for and, one can dig up running totals in the EPL, and per game basis of players. For per game, you are looking at Chalk Board and Stats.

    For a player like Cazorla, who makes so many passes, Chalk Board shows you every pass, and sometimes the number you count up isn’t consistent for the total during the game from Stats. So, I might be wrong by 1 or 2 on distributing passes in each half.

    Home to WHam
    From Stats, the total passes Cazorla made was 76 @ 93.4%: 71 successful, 5 not successful. He had 27 successful passes in the first half and 3 unsuccessful. In the second half, he had 44 successful passes and 2 unsuccessful. 1 of his first half successful passes was deemed a key pass. He assisted no goals in the game, but did assist 5 shots on net. I am assuming that crosses made by Cazorla are counted in the passes. He attempted 5 crosses during the game, of which 1 was successful. Which means out of the 5 unsuccessful passes he had in the game, only 1 was not a cross.

    Away to CPal
    82 total passes @ 91.5%: 75 successful and 7 unsuccessful in the game. He had 48 successful and 5 unsuccessful passes in the first half, and 27 successful and 2 unsuccessful passes in the second half. Three of his first half passes were deemed key passes. He assisted no goals, but did assist 4 shots. He attempted 1 cross which was not successful.

    Home to Lpool
    96 total passes @ 90.6%: 87 successful and 9 unsuccessful in the game. He had 35 successful and 7 unsuccessful in the first half, and 52 successful and 2 unsuccessful passes in the second half. Key passes were 1 in the first half and 2 in the second half. He assisted no goals, but did assist 3 shots on net. None of his 4 crosses was successful.

    Away to Newc
    127 total passes @ 92.9%: 118 successful and 9 unsuccessful in the game. Enhanced chance of being off by 1 in 1st/2nd distribution here. He had 47 successful and 6 unsuccessful passes in the first half, and 71 succcessful and 3 unsuccessful passes in the second half. He assisted no goals, but did assist 4 shots on net. He crossed the ball 5 times, of which 2 were successful.

    Home to Stoke
    83 total passes @ 89.2%: 74 successful and 9 unsuccessful in the game. He had 40 successful and 6 unsuccessful in the first half, 34 successful and 2 unsuccessful passes in the second half. Key passes were 1 in the first half and 4 in the second half. One of his second half passes was an assist on a goal, 6 other passes were assist on shots. Error of 1 in total passes.

    30/46=76, 53/29=82, 42/54=96, 53/74=127, 46/36=82

    The average number of passes attempted per half is 46.4, and the variance of this estimate is about 179. As 179 is very unlikely to statistically be the same as 46.4, we cannot say the the number of passes Cazorla attempts in a half is the same for all halves he has played this season. This is a situation of an over-dispersed distribution, and perhaps one could try a negative binomial distribution to describe how many pass attempts he makes in a half.

    I suspect you cannot say that all 5 teams we played against are statistically the same, nor can you say Cazorla makes more or fewer passes in the second half compared to the first half.

    Which pretty much beats to death, Santi Cazorla and his wonderful passing.

    Oh, the Metro article that prodded me to do this, said Cazorla had made 414 passes. has him at 425 successful passes so far this season.

  • Jambug


    You really are Diligent.

    Although I will not always comment, I always appreciate the hard graft you put in.

    Much appreciated.

    Beats ‘Theo’s shite because I say so’, any day of the week !!!

  • Gord

    Thanks Jambug.