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October 2016
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There has to be some good news somewhere. Ah, here it is

By Tony Attwood

Of course defeats get me down.  They always have, ever since I was a child supporting a very weak Arsenal team indeed.

But I learned, as I moved out of childhood, that you can’t let these things get at you.   I can’t do anything about Arsenal’s performance; indeed I’m not sure I can do very much about what happens outside my immediate circle of friends, family, and work colleagues.   I do try mental projection of the sort of future I’d like to see but I rather suspect I need to go on a course to get that sort of activity to work.

However I do have measures that help me, even if they don’t do much for Arsenal.   Last night I went dancing in Lincolnshire, and there’s nothing like physical activity, laughs and fun with friends to get all the endorphins going.

Plus, checking the anniversaries for today I see that this is indeed a moment for much agonising about bad results.  Indeed there’s even an article about how little it all means (see the link in the extract from the anniversary files, below)

Certainly the news of the defeat of the oil sheikdom of forced disappearances, state abductions, torture in custody, flogging and stoning which runs and pays for Man City brought some relief.  2-1 away to WBA might be upsetting, but a 4-1 home defeat to Liverpool! brought some relief from the news of a missed penalty and yet more injuries.

And indeed a peek between my fingers at the league table shows we are two points off the top, while still having “all those injuries”.   Mind you, as I half managed to prove the other week, injuries don’t actually have too much to do with results.  Liverpool! have a team’s worth and they managed to beat Flogging and Stoning at a stadium paid for by the long-suffering British taxpayer.

The fact that Russia’s oil money which funds Chelsea has also failed to give the club what all the press gave it before the season began (another league trophy) is rather reassuring too, for this season is starting to suggest  that money doesn’t automatically buy a club the league title – which is clearly what State Torture City and Millhouse LLC both imagined to be the case.

So, some relief in such thoughts, but perhaps the most promising line of recovery, other than a sturdy walk around Rutland Water proposed in my household for lady on today, was the news that Fifa’s ethics committee are on the rampage.

I’ve put forward before the notion that Fifa is rather like the Soviet Union, but without the deep sense of humour, but I might have to change that view if the news coming out that the German judge Hans-Joachim Eckert is about to call Blatter and Platini to his headmaster’s study in the next few days to tell them about the proposed sanctions against them.

The investigatory arm of Eckert’s committee, is it suggested in Switzerland, is trying to get both men banned for four years over the fraudulent payment of £1.35m which came on top of the £203,465 a year salary.  There’s a lovely explanation that suggests that the two had a gentleman’s agreement over the £1.35m, but that rather falls down because a gentleman’s agreement does require at least one gentleman to be present.

The defence that Fifa could not afford to pay Platini despite its profits, rather raises the question of what it did with the £78m made over the previous four years.  Spent it on bribes I suppose.  Anyway it is mismanagement of Fifa, conflict of interest, false accounting and noncooperation with the ethics committee which make up much of the case.

What happens next will be a personal hearing by the dead-men-walking before Judge Eckert.  In a possible lovely season of goodwill present to all anti-Fifarians everywhere both men could be banned before Christmas.

Of course Blatter, even when taken ill, is never one to rest from his remorseless scheming, plotting, planning, corruption and general collusion with his lapdogs such as the English Football Association.  His latest wheeze is to suggest he will step down quietly if in return he could take on the role of honorary adviser to the next Führer, which he would graciously accept.

Meanwhile our old chum Sol Campbell has started to say that Fifa to be disbanded altogether.  We always knew Sol was a Gooner, but the idea he might read Untold too, is most welcome.

So I approach another day without the gloom that might be expected, knowing also that two more defeats in the Champs League won’t upset me too much either.   Indeed I even broke into a smile on reading the Telegraph’s headline this morning:   Winston Reid: West Ham will ‘overtake’ Tottenham

Now if your club’s ambitions are to “overtake Tottenham” where are you in the world?

I’ll be at the game of course on Tuesday, and of course I want an 8-0 victory with no injuries.  But I’ll also be at Latimer Park, home of Burton Park Wanderers, to see Kettering Town against Poole Town next weekend (Kettering being homeless and so ground sharing with Burton Park).    When my family moved out of north London we moved to Dorset, and Poole was the local club, so my dad and I alternated between watching them and Bournemouth and Boscombe Athletic, when we couldn’t make the long trek back to Highbury.

No matter what happens to the Arsenal this week, such a trip will bring about a certain sense of proportion.

Premier Division League Table

Team Pld W D L F A GD Pts
1 Poole Town 20 13 4 3 40 20 20 43
2 Leamington 20 11 5 4 28 15 13 38
3 Redditch United 20 10 7 3 27 17 10 37
4 Weymouth 20 9 7 4 24 13 11 34
5 Hungerford Town 21 9 7 5 33 25 8 34
6 Chippenham Town 19 8 7 4 28 19 9 31
7 Dunstable Town 20 8 6 6 34 27 7 30
8 King’s Lynn Town 19 9 2 8 24 23 1 29
9 Hitchin Town 16 8 4 4 32 23 9 28
10 Dorchester Town 19 8 4 7 33 29 4 28
11 Kettering Town 18 8 2 8 26 29 -3 26

The anniversaries of note

22 November 2010: Following irate comments after a defeat to Tottenham, the History Society looked back at other “disasters” – showing that a number of poor results can precede spectacular success.

22 November 2014.  The press made much of Arsenal’s “poor start” to the season of four wins, three defeats and five draws thus far.  Cazorla and Giroud scored, and matters turned around thereafter with five wins and a draw in the next six.

The Untold Books

Woolwich Arsenal the club that changed football, is now available on Kindle at £9.99.  For more details and to buy a copy please click here or go to Amazon Kindle and search for Woolwich Arsenal.


39 comments to There has to be some good news somewhere. Ah, here it is

  • nicky

    Defeats don’t get me down. They never have. Not involving Arsenal FC . We more mature followers of our great Club are used to defeats clutched from the jaws of victory and vice versa, going back to the 1930’s.
    When Arsenal are tipped to win is the time to beware. Upsets are about.
    Take yesterday.
    We scored one, Ozil hit the post, Cazorla slipped and missed a penalty and Campbell missed a simple one.
    Even conceding the goal that wasn’t, we would have won 4-3. On any other day.
    The old cry of Lucky Arsenal can equally be Unlucky Arsenal. Sometimes.
    All we do now is to soldier on, good times are just around the corner. All that’s just happened is that we have lost a bit of ground in the first 1/3rd of the season. If you feel disheartened, just think of leaders Citeh losing at home 4-nil. By that comparison, our display against WBA was nearly a success!
    A lot more will happen between now and May to test the confidence and loyalty of the Arsenal faithful.
    We must be ready. 😉

  • WalterBroeckx

    I did almost the same as you Tony: physical excercise.
    As I had a match yesterday evening I had to dash after the final whistle and had a nice evening out with a great match and after the match the loss was somewhere forgotten.
    Maybe we could suggest those still young and healty enough to go on a run after a defeat. It sure helps.

  • Jai

    We remain level on points with City, just one behind United, but when you can’t win games like this one, you can’t help but worry about our title pretensions. Still, it is just 2 points between us and the top of the table, so while it’s a big disappointment it’s hardly a killer blow.

    What may have greater consequences is the injury to Coquelin. Obviously we have to wait and see how serious it is and how long he’s going to be out for. Hopefully it’s not too bad, but it’s one of those where it could just as easily be long-term as it is a temporary absence. He went in hard on that challenge, both players got the ball at the same time, and he could have damaged his ligaments.

    Fingers crossed, obviously, but if he were to be out for any sustained period it means the manager is going to have to rethink the midfield completely. Cazorla-Coquelin works, I’m not sure Cazorla-Flamini or Cazorla-Anyone Else does. Perhaps the return of Aaron Ramsey gives us something to work with there, but it will definitely change the dynamic of the team if Coquelin is out for a while.

    All in all, a pretty unpleasant day at the office. We have Europe to contend with on Tuesday, the injury list keeps growing and that in itself means that we’re more susceptible to further fitness issues. It feels a little like we’re at a fork in the road in terms of the destination of our season. Let’s hope we can go down the right path.

    Till tomorrow.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Agree, the plight of City, and the crooks at FIFA, as well as other measures such as Rutland water can add some much needed cheer.
    But, still very sore at what we witnessed yesterday. I also fear for Coq……we don’t know the prognosis, but when was the last time an Arsenal player was less injured than expected. I have become a big fan of Coq, but like many, including the critics, I have feared the effect of his loss, especially as it is becoming abundantly clear that we do not have adequate backup for him….in terms not so much of ability, but players who can stay fit. Without knowing the big picture, but outside looking in, This may prove a costly and in-necessecary gamble on Mr Wengers behalf.I have long posted my admiration for Mr Wenger, but if I have one criticism, I think he underestimates the devastating effects of injuries on this squad when going into a season. I agreed with the pre season post on here that the numbers and quality in the squad looked good, but this spell of injuries has devastated this month, and has risked tiring out those playing for the Xmas period. If I were Wenger, I would be tempted to assume the worst possible scenario for injuries and plan accordingly! Unfortunately, some of our players, especially the English ones are very very injury prone, if extremely talented, and I see no evidence of that changing. To house such players, strong backup is needed.
    Yes , as Nicky says a lot can happen between now and May, and his other words of wisdom, supporting Arsenal is not for the faint hearted.
    But it really seems up for grabs this season. It is one thing losing out to the petro dollar boys, but it would be pretty galling should we lose out to an inferior team with an inferior manager due to lack of injury planning.
    We are in touch, make no mistake, but the list of defeats this season is not pretty. I would grade it ” can do better”
    I trust the manager to find a solution to this, either from within, or if need be, perhaps some activity in his hated Jan window.
    Let’s back them to put a crap few weeks behind us starting mid week

  • Pat

    I lost my faith in Sol Campbell when he said he would leave the country if taxes for rich people were put up. The top tax rate in this country used to be 90 per cent. Now it’s 40 per cent.

  • Michael Ram

    Though upset at Arsenal losing, I’m glad that Leicester is top team now. Kudos to Claudio Ranieri. I’m a big fan. The way the English media used to humiliate and the way they humiliate him at the beginning of the season shows only a football manager knows what’s good for a football club. No matter what happen to Leicester at the end of the season, I think Ranieri has cemented himself in the hearts of the club. Well done and all the best!

  • Clockendrider

    When tax rates were at 90% we had a three day week, power cuts and everything was orange and brown. England was a truly shit place. Let’s not look back through rose tinted specs at a place that didn’t exist.

  • Gord

    Like many, I am disappointed in the loss.

    On the loanees, I didn’t finish yesterday. Toral played the entire game. Maitland-Niles played the last 20 or so.

    If FIFA does get its act cleaned up, maybe refereeing will as well. An idea. Referees are there in large part to try and provide a safe environment for the game to be played in. Let’s double the pay of salaries of referees per game (at the highest level, might need to be more than double at lower levels). If a player from either team gets injured due to contact between players in a game, the referee misses his/her next game. It doesn’t matter if a foul was called, or if the officials seen the incident. Referees that let play develop such that players inevitably get injured, will probably spend half the season on suspension (hence the reason to double salaries per game).

  • SamuelAkinsolaAdebosin

    Arsenal did not lose yesterday to West Brom because of injuries which some Gunners have. The Gunners starting XI and the bench of yesterday are all senior internationals but adelaide and with only Rhinosacker being a retired international in that starts. Most of the starters have even played in the Ucl and at the World Cup. So, the unavailability of some top Gunners who fell to injuries is not an excuse at all for Arsenal not beating Spurs and WBA as Man City crumbled to present 5 golden points to Arsenal on a platter to top the table. But the available Gunners that played in those last 2 games have preferred to use the injuries to their collegues as a scapegoat for their game carelessness, instead of to blame themselves and apologise to the Boss and us for their imploding defeats.
    I think we’ll be pampering the Gunners to much if we don’t tell them the truth. Having now failed to win in 3 back to back games in all competitions, some of the Gunners MUST wake up from their slumbers and become business serious in their games and stop any form of lackluster and carelessness performance in their games if they seriously want Arsenal to become Champions in the 3 competitions they are competing for this I think we’ll be pampering the Gunners to much if we don’t tell them the truth. Having now failed to win in 3 back to back games in all competitions, some of the Gunners MUST wake up from their slumbers and become business serious in their games and stop any form of lackluster and carelessness performance in their games if they seriously want Arsenal to become Champions in

  • SamuelAkinsolaAdebosin

    My comment is such of mix-up and kind of truncated. Sorry for that. I think it’s my phone typing paragraph key malfunctioning. But I hope my thoughts can be figured out.

  • Pat

    Hi Clockendrider. Britain was not so very shit in the seventies. You could still get a council house in London. There was still regulation of private landlords. Britain still produced coal and steel.

    Students didn’t have to pay £9000 fees. People could get jobs with security and decent wages. The National Health Service was not being run down and privatised. Old people could still get meals on wheels. Women having babies weren’t sent home the next day.

    I could go on.

  • Goéland

    Reading that Wenger interview shows the importance of long-term planning, staying the course, and not overreacting, either to bad defeats or glorious victories. Fair criticism is necessary at all times. So while we wait for news on Coquelin (fingers crossed, obviously), I´ll enjoy the imminent suspension for Platini and Blatter, hoping that it helps lead us to a healthier and more honest future for football, although it doesn´t mean we can stop being vigilant.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Season tickets were cheaper in the 70s as well!
    But as for the lead article, I am afraid not really a lot of good news at all this weekend football wise, starting to look like Coq out for a few months.
    And just got worse, now we will get all the bigging up of media darlings, change of balance of power and such the like, not a problem in itself, as we all know how that ends (though of course the law of averages says the media will eventually get it right )but all with the sub text of having a go at Wenger.
    Hopefully, Ramsey will soon return, think the team really miss him

  • Mandy Dodd

    Regarding FIFA, have a feeling they have been forced to act, believe the U.S. Have been threatening to confiscate their considerable assets under their RICO (anti racketeering ) act if they don’t sort themselves out. Who is to say the U.S. Won’t do that anyway of course.
    Quite optimistic things will change for the better with FIFA, may even filter down to the PGMOL one day.

  • Tom

    On the squad depth – Arsenal are 1 and 6 in all competitions when four or more first team players rested.
    That’s a winning percentage of 16.6, with the only win coming against Tottenham , who themselves rested more than four starters for the league cup game Arsenal won 2:1.

    Arsenal always seem short of players going into every season. I mean, we do have players but are they Arsenal material?

    Let’s look at JC for example shall we.
    If you asked most on here ,they would probably say Campbell is a talented international who is just waiting for his chance, but those are the same people who would rather start Gibbs in place of Campbell against a mid table Seansea. Then what the hell is Campbell even doing in Arsenal squad then?

    Then we have players like Arteta and Rosicky who were never going to give us much this season and if you didn’t know this , then you sleep walked through the last season.

    Then we have players like Wilshere and Coquelin , who because of their highly combative style of play will never last the season.

    People on here are quick to point out Arsenal players suffer more injuries because they are treated harsher than other players , but they choose to ignore the fact that no Arsenal player has gotten injured through a bad tackle by opponent this season yet, and only one of the Wilshere’s three long injury spells were the facto a result of a bad tackle in the league game. Two others happened in training and against Denmark on international duty.

    I could go on but you get my drift.
    Arsenal’s first eleven is as talented as any , but the rest of the squad is not good enough.

    Between the young prospects and the aging injury prone veterans ,there’s a huge drop off in quality other top teams don’t have.

    Before the season’s start Thiery Henry, who played at the highest level possible and spends time with this Arsenal squad , said Arsenal were four players away from a title .

    At the time I disagreed with him but maybe he knew what he was talking about , while people like me were just hoping.

  • Va Cong

    hindsight is amazing isn’t it Tom?

  • Tom

    Va Cong
    Yes and no.

    The Arteta , Rosicky thing , I was ahead of the curve by about 2 seasons.
    You can throw Flamini into the mix as well.
    Two seasons ago I had a debate with someone called ‘Save from Australia’ – sorry if I get the name incorrect , who said Arteta Flamini combo was the best in the league. To which I said that neither one were good enough to play the holding mid role for Arsenal.

    Also regarding injuries I was way ahead of the curve , even when Walter was publishing his wishful injury articles claiming half of injuries as impact injuries. I strongly disagreed then and I strongly disagree now.

    Only two of Arsenal’s two dozen injuries this season have been impact injuries. Wilshere’s in training and Coquelin’s yesterday and none were considered foul play.

    So you can throw this hindsight thing at me all you want , you will be in good company on here, but it’s not exactly true .

  • Mandy Dodd

    Tom, yes, we have had some highs this season, but when you list some of the defeats, it does not look so pretty. And an Arsenal November.
    With the squad players, I am sure a lot of them have potential, but as Wenger clearly does not preferentially trust all of them, they can look rusty when they come in.
    But Coq is a worry, and agree, with Artetas ….and for that matter, Flaminis recent record of injuries, that was a gamble… hearing he may be out for three months to make things worse. Flamini has a bit of a burden on his shoulders unless Wenger has a surprise in coqs role, or he plays a different system. Also agree on Coq and Jacks combative nature, as much as I like both, I shut my eyes and hold my breath when they go into tackles,
    Of course we do not know what Wenger did or didn’t attempt over the summer. If we really were after Benzema, now glad we didn’t get him. I thought we looked ok….apart from perhaps the Coq role, but 10 injuries later……
    I trust Wenger to get on top of this, but this level of injury is a huge worry, looks like he will have his work cut out, I wonder if he will at least consider something in January?

  • Mandy Dodd

    And forgot to add, this month , we seem to have gone back to some bad old days ….at times…..defensively , this month at least, Coqs absence is not going to help there either.
    Just one bad weekend…..

  • Nadir Khan

    I don’t know what’s up with this guy attwood, always giving the impression that everything is all right, not unlike Wenger. Now, I trust Arsene to figure something out for the next matches but buying cover for Coquelin in the summer wouldn’t have hurt. Now we all know about your well publicized love for Arsene but he’s only human like the rest of us: susceptible to making mistakes. What don’t you, for once, accept that Tony?

  • syd

    Is this a football site or a party political broadcast? Oh well here’s what I think ……The 70’s was garbage pub’s shut at 3 union’s run the country the national front was rampant Spurs got relegated (sorry that was a high point) Man Utd got relegated!!!!( another high point) Chelsea got relegated ( slowly changing my mind here) Arsenal beat Totts 5-0 at WHL Arsenal won the double and you could get a Vesta curry and rice for 50. Sorry changed ny mind the 70’s weren’t so bad after all.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Some great music in the 1970s, especially towards the end. The National front were around in various guises in subsequent decades as well, now we have the the EDL or whatever they were called.
    Shit pitches , but some great players…..and for what became its faults, standing terraces, hope we see the safe version again.
    But we had Jimmy Saville…and others similar types at large. And protected. didn’t have IS but had the IRA, actiually, shouldn’t even go there.
    But overall, prefer our football now to what I can remember of the 70s

  • Mandy Dodd

    Some great music in the 1970s, especially towards the end. The National front were around in various guises in subsequent decades as well, now we have the the EDL or whatever they were called.
    Shit pitches , but some great players…..and for what became its faults, standing terraces, hope we see the safe version again.
    But we had Jimmy Saville…and others similar types at large. And protected. didn’t have IS but had the IRA, actiually, shouldn’t even go there.
    But overall, prefer our football now to what I can remember of the 70s

  • Mandy Dodd

    Sorry, don’t know why that repeated

  • Brickfields Gunners

    A mixed weekend really , Arsenal losing was a bummer , but City getting pissed on was a big cheer ! Manure stealing it at the death was again another downer, but the Foxes topping the table gets a thumbs up from me .
    Spuds winning was ….damn !
    Another 14 points and we will not be relegated – that’s something to look forward to !

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Not the real McCoy ?

    Recently a routine police patrol car was parked outside a bar in the Outback. After last call, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity, in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it.

    He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off; it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little, and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons’ vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

    The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, “I’ll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.”

    “I doubt it,” declared the man with pride. “Tonight I’m the designated decoy.”

  • para

    I wonder what the plan is for our CL game? How will we fare? Are we going to try to get further or are we not bothered? Questions and more questions, we will see tonight.

    Norwich, Sunderland, Villa and City to come with another CL game to go, i for one would like us to concentrate on PL, but if the spirits favour us at all i would be really pleased! 🙂

    I’ve noticed we never seem to get it right when the other teams “slip up”, we slip up too, like it is designated in some craftily structured plan to make the PL more “exciting”. 🙁

  • Terrence

    One of my pals said that it always happens in a season. That moment when you realise that the nagging feeling you had about Wenger being wrong about something was actually right. All Arsenal fans question themselves. Wenger is a manager of the utmost intellect. He can joust on most topics, religion, globalisation, terrorism… but he can’t spare a little of his smarts for his squad.

    Arteta was dead 3 years ago when Chelsea set up a team to take advantage of his weakness through the middle. He can barely string 3 games together without picking up an injury, yet he’s our number one back up for the 24 year old Coquelin. This summer was the summer of defensive midfielders, they were available by the truckload. But we ignored them all and stuck with Arteta… and Flamini, another player we know the manager isn’t exactly fond of talent wise.

    I don’t know what the prognosis is for Coq, but if he’s out for an extended period of time, our season is over. I don’t mean to be dramatic here, but we have no one that can cover his position. Jack Wilshere could, but that’s a big if and fitness wise, he’s a massive, massive risk.

    Why are we in the position again? How did the manager get himself into this situation again? How did he not see what we all saw?

    What makes me madness me the most is this. Why does our squad have players in it that aren’t good enough? Wenger has been trying to get rid of Joel Campbell for years. If we can’t get rid of him, sell him. Arteta shouldn’t be on the playing staff now. He’s about as effective as Robert Pires would be. Flamini hasn’t been good enough the whole time he’s been here. So why is he a prominent squad member?

    People say, ‘he’s good enough for the squad, but maybe not good enough as a direct back up’… I’ve seen that so many times. If he’s not good enough as back up. He’s not good enough. It’s absurd that fans think it’s cool to have players that are ok for like, 10minutes every three months. Like we’re some sort of sentimental community care home for likeable players, over being a sporting entity that can’t have chinks in its armour.

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Look to the future

    Rabbi Herzl was visiting Mrs Gold, an elderly member of his congregation. Rabbi Herzl said, “You know, my dear Mrs Gold, that you are getting on in years and although I pray to the almighty that he will grant you many more years in good health, you really should now be thinking more of the hereafter.”
    Mrs Gold replied, “Thank you, Rabbi, but I am always thinking about the hereafter.”
    Rabbi Herzl was rather surprised with this response.
    “Really?” he said.
    “Oh yes, Rabbi, every time I go upstairs, I say to myself, ‘what am I here after?’ and every time I go into my kitchen, I say to myself, ‘what am I here after?’ I do it all the time now.”

  • Brickfields Gunners

    A look at the future? Or are we past it ?

    A salesman checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before the next day’s meeting, he called down to the desk clerk to ask if there was a barber on the premises.

    “I’m afraid not, sir,” the clerk told him apologetically, “but down the hall from your room is a vending machine that should serve your purposes.”

    Skeptical but intrigued, the salesman located the machine, inserted $15.00, and stuck his head into the opening, at which time the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later the salesman pulled out his head and surveyed his reflection, which reflected the best haircut of his life.

    Two feet away was another machine with a sign that read, ‘Manicures, $20.00.’ “Why not?” thought the salesman. He paid the money, inserted his hands into the slot, and the machine started to buzz and whirl.

    Fifteen seconds later he pulled out his hands and they were perfectly manicured.

    The next machine had a sign that read, ‘This Machine Provides a Service Men Need When Away from Their Wives, 50 Cents.’

    The salesman looked both ways, put fifty cents in the machine, unzipped his fly, and with some anticipation, stuck his manhood into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of agony and almost passed out.

    Fifteen seconds later it shut off. With trembling hands, the salesman was able to withdraw his member….. which now had a button sewed on the end.

  • Brickfields Gunners

    The Code of Ethical Behavior for Patients –

    1. Do not expect your doctor to share your discomfort.

    Involvement with the patient’s suffering might cause him to lose valuable scientific objectivity.

    2. Be cheerful at all times.

    Your doctor leads a busy and trying life and requires all the gentleness and reassurance he can get.

    3. Try to suffer from the disease for which you are being treated.

    Remember that your doctor has a professional reputation to uphold.

    4. Do not complain if the treatment fails to bring relief.

    You must believe that your doctor has achieved a deep insight into the true nature of your illness, which transcends any mere permanent disability you may have experienced.

    5. Never ask your doctor to explain what he is doing or why he is doing it.

    It is presumptuous to assume that such profound matters could be explained in terms that you would understand.

    6. Submit to novel experimental treatment readily.

    Though the surgery may not benefit you directly, the resulting research paper will surely be of widespread interest.

    7. Pay your medical bills promptly and willingly.

    You should consider it a privilege to contribute, however modestly, to the well-being of physicians and other humanitarians.

    8. Do not suffer from ailments that you cannot afford.

    It is sheer arrogance to contract illnesses that are beyond your means.

    9. Never reveal any of the shortcomings that have come to light in the course of treatment by your doctor.

    The patient-doctor relationship is a privileged one, and you have a sacred duty to protect him from exposure.

    10. Never die while in your doctor’s presence or under his direct care.

    This will only cause him needless inconvenience and embarrassment.

  • Terrence the answer has been written on this site so many times it is getting boring. Players of the highest quality will only come to a club if they see they are going to be an automatic first choice, if they are happy with the environment, and if their current club is happy to get rid of them. Coquelin has been one of the top three defensive midfielders in Europe this season according to the standard statistics, so it is obvious to any player taking up that position that he would not become first choice. So that rules out anyone of the highest quality. Thus what Arsenal does is try to bring through youngsters – like Coquelin and Bellerin last season.

  • Nadir Khan I would refer you to the earlier answer I gave on this. By the way, have you ever thought that being abusive to the person who oversees a blog is not necessarily the best way to get your piece published?

  • para

    Looks like Le Coq is out til January at the least. We all saw this coming sooner than later and most wonder who will fill that void with Arteta also injured?
    Anyway, would love to see another youth step up and make it hard for Le Coq to get back in the team 🙂

    Xmas games a worry, i wonder when Ramsey is back? He could finally get to play midfield center again.

    Changes on changes, but as we all know change brings progress, don’t let anyone tell you different.


  • Clockendrider

    Pat at 5.24,
    The reason we could stil produce steel and coal was because the taxpayer had to subsidise it so massively, hence the ludicrous tax rates you seem to think is a good thing. Strikes were the norm as a succession of weak and incompetent governments didn’t have the nerve to tackle increasingly corrupt unions run by and for their leaderships who were happy to indulge their memberships in the on-going fantasy that there is such a thing as a free lunch. Students didn’t pay 9k a year. But then very, very few working class students went to university in any case so where’s the problem.
    No, the 70’s were shit if you came from a working class urban background. I can appreciate the likes of Corbyn would like to kid people otherwise but as long as there are still people who had to live with the results of the country being run by middle class hand wringers who thought they understood what it means to be poor as a result of having read a book during a sociology lecture, we won’t be kidded otherwise.

  • Jai

    Tony,Our starting line-up has a strong familiarity. It’s the same players week in week out until they break. Sanchez has been really poor of late. He looks in desperate need of a rest. He’s not going to get one until he pings a hamstring. I kind of feel like Laurent looked jaded, possibly mentally. I’m not going to blame Wenger here, but we have a manager that believes in pure focus all the time… sometimes without understanding the players are sentient beings (i.e. Wenger doesn’t usually give players time at home over Christmas because he doesn’t like spending time at home). I thought both our centre backs were weak yesterday. I also though Giroud, outside the goal, was pretty bland.

    We’re not in a situation where we don’t have a deep enough squad to deal with rotation, which puts more load onto the players, which leads to more injuries. It’s the cycle we see every season. It’s the cycle we thought we’d see the back of when the money rolled in and we could afford a bigger squad.

    Missed Opportunity

    People are pointing out that we are only 2 points off the lead in November. Sure, I can see that, I have eyes and the internet. But also, it’s worth noting that Spurs and West Ham are 5 points behind us. Liverpool, a team that sacked their manager for poor results, are 6 behind us with Southampton and Everton and their are now 3 teams ahead of us. It’s not like 2 points has any breathing space.

    Yesterday was a massive opportunity missed. The sort of slip we come to expect from this side. The sort of loss that would be easier to deal with if you weren’t fully aware that these sort of blips are quite regular. Zagreb, Olympiacos, Bayern and Sheffield Wednesday.

    I want to be confident about the league, but I can’t be. I think for a side to win the league, you have to sense invincibility, or at least the potential to be invincible. I don’t get that with this squad. It’s feeble at times. A team best served under little pressure. A team that feels 2-3 players off being contenders.

    It’s such a shame as well because we have some brilliant players coming into their prime. We have a season where nobody wants to win the league. Wenger knows best though, and after last season, he decided he didn’t need any outfield players.

    We paid the price for that yesterday.

    It’s not about bad luck. It’s about bad planning. It’s about invincible complacency.

    Still, there’s always the January transfer window, right?

  • Nadir Khan

    Now that was a low blow Tony. I’m not looking to make a career out of this anyway. Getting published or not I still look towards the Untold as the number one Arsenal blog available as it highlights the positives unlike the other blogs run by people who don’t know shit about football.
    P.S I never meant to be abusive. Sorry if you felt that way.

  • Menace

    Jai -your glass is half empty.

    syd – you were used to publish BT privatisation but your comment brought a smile. Party 7s were in & Mandy the Arsenal pitch was probably the best even in those days. Our football was methodical until Ray Kennedy went to Littlewoods…. oops Liverpool.

    Tony good pasodoble with Nadir Khan.

  • Jerry

    No premier league manager sends their players home for Christmas (at least the ones not from London). When did you want him to send the players home for vacation between games on Dec 21, Dec 26, Dec 28, and Jan 2?

    Unless you’ve found a way to stop time or you’re the real Marty McFly?