Untold Awards 2: The worst player of the year who has played against Arsenal.

By Billy the Dog McGraw.

A little while ago, while celebrating Robin Van Persie’s Double Player of the Year success, the idea came up that we should have our Untold Awards.

These were duly set out, and now we are running through the results.  We have already announced that Francis Coquelin wins the award for the player most likely to break through big time into the first team.

Now we move onto the award for the worst player of the year who has played against Arsenal.

We got a wide range of suggestions – I have included one or two comments from the nominations list which I thought were particularly pertinent.

  • Nasri
  • Barton
  • Mario Balotelli
  • Paul Robinson (letting in 7 to Arsenal at the Emirates)
  • Ledley King (“Walcott twisted him inside out during the 2nd half,like a pretzel.
  • Torres (“impressively poor”)
  • John Terry (“the sight of him headbutting the floor as RVP scored was priceless”
  • Armand Traore
  • Aguero (“I had hoped for a better performance from him but he was too busy hiding behind kos”)
  • The entire Tottenham  team for throwing 13pts away
  • El Shaarawy (Ac Milan) for the second game.
  • Rafael Potential
  • Gareth Bale (“he was pathetic and of course diving all over the place”).
  • Scott Parker
  • Andy Carroll.
  • Alan Hutton

There was also a nomination for Zamora – “we played against him thrice, 0 wins, 1 draw, 2 losses! hurt us the most” – which may well be true, but isn’t quite what we meant.

Choosing one person is difficult, so we initially produced a short list of men who all got a lot of nominations:

  • Nasri
  • Barton
  • Mario Balotelli
  • Ledley King
  • John Terry
  • The entire Tottenham  team
  • Gareth Bale

An impressive bunch you will agree.  We decided we couldn’t go with the whole Tottenham team since that was slightly outside of the remit of the question.  But we’ll give them an honourable mention.

Nasri could have got it but our feeling in the end was that he was more annoying than anything else, and has by and large played fairly averagely all season – when he has had a game that is.  No one mentioned Cesc leaving – perhaps because it was felt he was honourable and anyway, didn’t actually win anything apart from a fairly insignificant cup.

Barton we felt had just be obnoxious and disgraceful for too long, Balotelli really does require mediacl help, and for that he has some sympathy.  There was also sympathy for Ledley King since it is not right to laugh at crippled old men.  And Bale… well Bale certainly could have won it because he is supposed to be so good.  But he gave us a great laugh with his supposed statements in the last week about leaving Tottenham if they don’t get into the Champs League.  Such is life.

But in the end we went with good old John Terry.  Alleged racist, a man who seemingly sold visits to the training ground for £20k a shot, whose father seems to have an involvement with drug dealing and whose mother has been cautioned for shop lifting and then had the temerity to claim that she didn’t understand that this meant that she’d admitted and was going to appeal and then…  well, didn’t.

Oh we could go on and on about J Terry, and the nature of a country that actually lets him play for them and be their captain.  But this is a family web site, so that’s enough.

The winner of the Untold Award for Worst Player of the Year to have Played Against Arsenal is…

John Terry

with an honourable mention to the entire Tottenham Hotspur team for throwing away a 13 point lead.

Stoke City v Arsenal

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31 Replies to “Untold Awards 2: The worst player of the year who has played against Arsenal.”

  1. Joey Barton is the biggest C*** of the year, thats for sure.
    And who didnt want to punch smug Pulis last night on MOTD gloating at his ‘Draw’.?
    But the Stoke fans booing Ramsey can only be described as Scum!

  2. They all win in different catagories.
    Barton Thug should be in jail
    Ballotelli spoilt brat
    Nasri obnoxious
    Bale diving medal tipped for olympic team
    Terry is in a catagory of his own one that no one can relate to.

  3. JT for England, what does that say about us?

    Yes the media made a bigger deal out of Suarez, But, JT was caught on camera to utter the words and that with his great family and love life makes him Prick of the season, and many more of those to come.

  4. ON SECOND THOUGHT, I know as stated “The worst player to play against us”, BUT, I think we should have another chance to nominate “The worst Human Being\Manager”

    My winner would be Good Ol ‘Arry and possibly Rosie (his bitch with brains).

  5. I am a bit of a super mario type myself but I can only respect your choice of JT, he has fabulous credentials for this award.
    All I will say in his favour, he is currently doing a fantastic job assisting Jose in managing Chelsea. All the way to the CL final, all things being equal, they may even stand a chance…but of course, all things are not equal

  6. Arsenal will be tagged the worst big club the moment chelsea wins the champions league. The only motivation arsenal fans have is that they think they are better than chelsea…may be it will be switched to spurs next season or man city. Forget the leagues,what makes a big team is winning the champions league.

  7. Apologies, off topic. England want to approach Roy Hodgson to be new England manager.
    So many questions.
    Will England play like Fulham did?…erm hope not
    Will he stand up to egos better than at Liverpool?
    Will the media give him a fair crack of the whip?
    Is he a cheaper option?

    And, more importantly….
    Does this appointment say more about Arry than it does about Roy?

  8. @ Dagashini

    Why do idiots always say that you’re only a big team if you win the Champions League? It’s so illogical. If the Champs Leaguie had been around in the 1930’s we’d have won it more times than Man U. What about doing the double in 3 different decades or ion two different millenia; or going unbeaten for a whole season; or winning 3 consecutive league titles in the first 50 years of your existence. Oh no, none of those are any good because Man U haven’t done them.

    Grow up mate. You can’t buy history.

  9. Speaking of MOTD – was it only me who was mightily annoyed by Gary Lineker’s mickey-take of Arsene Wenger right at the end of MOTD yesterday? Seriously unimpressive behaviour 🙁

  10. “we would have won it”….rubbish! You don’t need local competitions to know you are big. If these are your points..then arsenal is just like Lyon,Partizan Belgrade,Polonia Warsaw; Local champions. Messi will never be classed with the likes of Maradona and Pele until he wins the world cup likewise arsenal will never be classed among the best teams until the club wins the champions league. To be an arrogant failure is to insult your superiors. The unbeaten season is no record,it’s only a record considering the number of matches involved. ..and do you know how arsenal got back into the old first division after relegation….

  11. The BBC has been quite weird this weekend.

    First was Lineker’s toe-cringeingly awful mockery of Wenger. It was …just……wierd….punctuated by an off-screen chortle. It’s the worst thing I’ve seen since Keith Chegwin.

    And then tonight they had a homage to Tony Pulis. Wierd. Citing Crouch’s route 1 wonder goal as proof that Stoke don’t really maim opponents, but actually play great football.

    Oh, and for the record, the BBC fully endorsed the Stoke fans mocking Wenger, even though the content of the mockery was calling him a “French Twat”.

    I don’t think Wenger was overly bothered by those particular insults…they seem pretty mild really, but technically they are racist. I just find it a bit wierd when the politically correct BBC start endorsing racism.

  12. Mandy I would prefer Brendan Rodgers or Roberto Martinez at short notice for one tournament.

    Marcus there is just simply to much wrong with football and the media to take them all on at one time its a case of chipping away like the Untold Ref reviews and hope someone sits up and takes notice.
    But lineker ex Sp*rs player come on what would you expect ? BBC corruption in world cup votes programme one day before the world cup is announced ?

    Pullis I couldnt be bothered commenting on as the language I would use isnt appropriate for the web.

  13. In the “isn’t it rich” department, behold:

    Two weekends ago, Rod Hodgson put his “We’re Alright” stamp on the league-wide run-away refshite that got into the mainstream media. This weekend he is set to be named England’s manager. (Sir Roy to be, anyone?)

    Why does Stephen Sondheim’s lyric come to mind:
    Isn’t it rich?
    Isn’t it queer?
    Losing my timing this late
    In my career?
    And where are the clowns?
    Quick, send in the clowns.
    Don’t bother – they’re here.

  14. Pete,
    That’s why Lineker’s there and we’re here.
    He fits the mainstream media profile to a T.
    No analysis, just sneer it away. He ends his whoremoan dance saying “au revoir,” if you listen again. Xenophobe, well, yes: in the way he can get away with. Hence, he’s now a Complete coward who has parlayed his football career into the paycheck of a bottom feeder.

  15. @mandy redgooner

    In the past, there has been highway 1, and Ireland seemed to carry that philosophy longer than anyone. A coach for England could try to carry what people seem to want in the EPL (try to break legs, punch people in the kidney on a high ball, and so on), but UEFA/FIFA seemingly have little interest in that. Isn’t that what Hodgson brings? Rogers is expressive, but isn’t he Welsh? Would England take a Welsh coach? Coyle has done well with Wilshere and Ryo. I presume he is English. Can he play football for the world, and not just hack people down and long kicks?

  16. The media are bound to hammer Roy Hodgson because it was the media that peddled Harry Redknapp for England manager for weeks. Embarrassing!
    Tony, excellent choice of John Terry! The recent kneeing incident, when he denied it and then had to admit it all in the space of less than an hour, says everything.

  17. dagashini you sad little spudscum! Arsenal are 4th in the world for financial clout, ranked as the team to emulate for financial stability by FIFA and EUFA, have the manager of the decade according to EUFA’a award, Have the Invincibles and have been in the CL for the past 14 years,as well as in the top 4 for 15 consecutive years, have the Player of the Year in two categories and will likely have the Golden Boot Award winner as well, came from 17th position in October to 3rd in April, overcame a 10 point ¨gap¨ from the Tiny Totts (obviously your dream team of the century) and have a great stadium while enjoying financial stability, a superb youth and reserve development system….to name a few things your team doesn’t have and won’t likely ever manage under Twitchy (who by the way is being dissed by his own players and fans)!

    I suggest you stick to the whining Spuds website with your fellow cretins and morons and leave the AFc websites to intelligent bloggers.

  18. Gary Looseker?

    How many World Cup medals did he ever win? Oh sorry; that’s too much. How many Euro-Championship medals did he win? Yet, he is some sort of hero? An expert in what exactly? The art of eating chips? That tells you much about that bunch.

    Most annoying that the government finds it expedient to force us to pay TV Licence fee to fund those xenophobesat the BBC.

  19. LRV,
    Would that mean that taxpayers as well as fans are subsidizing the chip-eating chumpion? 🙂 (Oh course the fish would be from waters that surround the septic aisle only.)

  20. Hey Pete I dont know if you received a reply from the BBC. But I just got mine as I requested it.

    Gary Lineker’s closing line was a light-hearted reference to shots of Stoke fans behind the dugouts imitating Arsene Wenger’s mannerisms. A clear differentiation was made between this and the booing of Aaron Ramsey which Gary Lineker and Alan Hansen strongly condemned.
    In addition, Gary was not being xenophobic nor was he unfairly singling out a manager who has the admiration and respect of the whole ‘Match of the Day’ team and who has been the subject of praise on the show on many occasions.
    Shots of football managers and their behaviour on the touchline have long been a source of good-natured humour across our output and elsewhere. However, we are sorry if we have inadvertently offended you.
    I’d like to assure you I’ve registered your complaint on our audience log. This is an internal report of audience feedback which we compile daily and is available for viewing by all our staff. This includes all programme makers and presenters, along with our senior management. It ensures that your points, along with all other comments we receive, are considered across the BBC.

  21. So I take it then that Gary Lineker did an gibbering scotsman imitation of SAF on last night’s MOTD, complete with scary imaginary hand puppet, and finished it with “If you don’t like it then SEE YOU JIMMY!”

    Nope..?

    Thought not.

  22. There is no such thing a worst player…..its just that were were not fit for Arsenal.

  23. Dogface, the chicken song comes to mind when I look at that picture, someone should do a remix and let it spread like a viral wildfire. Excellent point by the way

  24. In reply to dagashini’s comment that Messi will not be considered a great player like Maradonna or Pele until he wins a World Cup.
    Can I name some other mediocre players who have not achieved this Feat? Alfredo Di Stefano, Ferenc Puskas, Johan Cruyff and as for that clod-hopper George Best, he never even played in a World Cup Final Tournament.

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