Arsenal v Manchester City: the most screamingly silly (and wrong) previews of all
By Tony Attwood
I know Untold doesn’t normally do pre-match stuff until the day of the game, but these snippets from the media suggest one or two old timers have been having a bit of a jolly before rushing back to the company computer to put up their latest thoughts.
And I don’t mean the Telegraph’s comment that “Jonathan Liew picks a composite XI [of Man C and Arsenal players] that would give even league leaders Leicester City a run for their money” in which the man-from-another-planet seems to forget that Arsenal have already given Leicester a run for their money at the King Power Whatnot, with a stunning 2-5 victory.
No, that is just the sort of found-under-the-counterstuff that the young wannabe likes to write and for some reason the Telegraph likes to publish.
No, it’s not that at all. It is the bit published (as the website edition tells me) at 3:53PM GMT 18 Dec 2015 on this monday’s match which goes like this…
At what time is this football match?
It’s at 19.45 GMT, which is 19.45 in the UK. Everywhere.
Arsene Wenger will hope to be presiding over an enormous win.
And you see, the point is that if you are going to try and do an imitation of Untold Arsenal when we do our sarky, sniggering, laughing-at-newspapers stuff, you really do have to try that little bit harder to get the basics right.
Yes, the time in the UK is currently Greenwich Mean Time – the sort of time that defines time zones around the world which are measured in plus and minus GMT. I don’t know if most UK citizens appreciate that we are currently in GMT, but we are, and jolly good for the Telegraph for realising it.
But THE GAME KICKS OFF AT 8PM.
The paper even does a rather silly How can I watch it? bit in which they answer…
Using your television set or internet-enabled device. It’s being televised by the kind people at Sky Sports as part of their Monday Night Football extravaganza. Coverage begins at 19.00 on Sky Sports One. Better yet, you can follow it live, right here, on your favourite sport website with the word “Telegraph” in its name.
Which makes it even sillier that they don’t know the kick off time.
Leaving aside the issue of whether a line by line description from people who don’t know the kick off time is better than live TV they forget to mention that with a ticket you can watch it in the stadium. Even if you don’t have a ticket you can still buy one from a tout.
Now I utterly don’t recommend this, but I mention it because of the totally abject way in which the police have failed to deal with obvious and overt touting around the stadium. We’ve had cases of one supporter who is loaning his wife’s season ticket to a mate because she can’t make it to the game, and is arrested for handing it over outside the entrance, while touts walk around outside the ground growling, “who wants tickets, I’ll buy or sell tickets”.
Moving on, the Independent, noting the Telegraph’s lack of grasp of the phrase “kick off” kicks off today (saturday in case you are a bit late getting up or living in Australia where it is already tomorrow) with
It’s a big game for…
Mesut Özil: The main criticism of Özil since he arrived in Premier League is that he doesn’t turn up in the big games.
Now that had me gawping a bit. I mean the guy has 13 assists and when David Moyes did his half-baked “the jury is still out on Özil” we all had a good laugh. But here is the Independent saying,
This game is a chance for Özil to silence his doubters with the result likely to play a large role in the title race.
They also have
Player to watch…
Olivier Giroud:With five goals in his last three games Giroud is currently on top of his game. The Frenchman has also scored twice in arsenal’s last three games against Manchester City.
Now what does that mean – “player to watch?” Does it mean you don’t watch the game but instead watch Giroud? Or that you watch the game and somehow might miss Giroud?
I had hoped to take all this a bit further with something from the Daily Mail but they don’t have too much on Arsenal. However they do have.
19 December 1903: Arsenal 5 Grimsby 1. The score meant Arsenal had scored 25 goals in six games, which left Arsenal second, two points behind league leaders Preston. In fact the season finished with Preston as champions, just one point ahead of Arsenal.
19 December 1933: Jim Fotheringham born. He joined Arsenal as an amateur in 1949 when Jim joined Arsenal as an amateur and after Bill Dodgin was dropped as keeper Jim got 39 games in the 1953/4 season before himself being dropped in favour once more of Dodgin.
7 comments to Arsenal v Manchester City: the most screamingly silly (and wrong) previews of all
I think it will be better if the match ticket touts are left to do their illegal business around the Ems Stadium. Why? They help Arsenal fans who hadn’t a season match ticket or who didn’t get money in time to buy a match day tickets to watch the game by making tickets available for them to buy it but at a higher cost.
I think the match day ticket touts have been existing for a very long time around the Stadia. They are also available around the Nigerian football stadia I should think. They used to be there when I used to go there to watch. But I now watch on my TV set because I am no longer physically strong to go to the stadium to watch like in those days. I preferred to rename the touts as, Match Day Ticket Vendors. Man must eat. They have to get a source of living to survive from the any prevailing harsh economic condition. To be a match day ticket tout may be unlawful since AFC did not sanction the sales. But it is not a criminal offence, is it? If the touts are not allowed to tout, they could fall in to doing criminality to make soul live. And that could make the Police job harder to deliver. So, it’s better they look the other way.
Chief Tony, Sir, I once heard the one time Nigerian ex sports Minister under Gen Sani Abacha regime said, “The Super Eagles is the team to watch” he said so when Nigeria boycotted an Afcon competition held in South Africa during the Presidency of President Nelson Mandela. And South Africa tried by allmeans to get the Super Eagles to come to play in that tournament but to no avail. And I also heard people said, eg,, Pele is a player to watch. I once went to the (ABS) Ahmadu Bello Stadium Kaduna, to specially watched Pele when he came to play in a Brazilian club side that came to play in Kaduna among other Nigerian towns to promote the products of PAMA company of Brazil.
What of if it is said, the match kicks off at 19:00 PM GMT. Is the English wrong? I thought the word ‘match’ is a possessive word that is followed with the word kicks. Please correct me in all the aboves if I am wrong.
Let me be concentrating on this Man Utd vs Norwich game. I saw Rooney got the ball into the Norwich’s net when I looked up from my keying. But the score board is still reading 0-0. And before I finish reading my comment for possible corrections to correct, I saw black looking Norwich player scored for Norwich as the 2 Red Devils marking him cannot stop him from taking a shot that beats de Gea at Utd goal. Pep Guardiola at Utd in Jan or Jose Mourinho? I must be kidding. LvG won’t allowed his job to be hijacked by any roving manager. I would think. Chelsea 2-0 Sunderland at HT. I’ve just watched the HT highlights and the Blues appeared to very serious to beat the Black Cats with Diego Costa missing 3 sitters. This is something the Blues were not doing before Mourinho got the matching orders from Abramovich. So, it’s true the Blues have conspired against Jose. I want to see Sunderland come back if they can. Thanks Sir.
SAA – Man nust eat – so go & do an honest days work rather than than the work of blood sucking fleas. Touts are ticks & fleas on sports fans.
It is time for the FA to review the Alexis camera pit visit & the robbery of 3 points by their specially appointed cheat Dean at Stamford Bridge. Their (FA) behaviour is nothing short of thuggery.
Talk about reviews, when will the PiGMOB review Atkinson, who lets every push in the back go (most from Newcastle, a few from Aston Villa too). Still can’t believe that incompetent will be in charge of Euro 2016 matches.
Off topic but I can’t help but notice that our friends in the media seem to be canvassing for Mourinho get the old Trafford job (which is still very much occupied by lvg). Whats wrong with these people? Can they not see how toxic this human being is? It’s like they have some kind of addiction to this divisive, poisonous and self-serving individual. Unbelievable.
Florian – spot on. My thoughts exactly.
And now a report from behind the scenes:
Since Mou was seen with SAF out to dinner with their bags some time ago, oh WAGS it seems it is, there have been all specuation and for some, conviction that the “not so special” one has masterminded his exit from the pits(Chel$), a pit he apparently dug for them it is (wildly) assumed that he will take up post at Manus pit and hope to fill it in to form a level playing field again.
It was Gardiola that was touted to be LVG’s heir but it seems he has other plans beside his xmas ones.
That’s it and back to the studio.
If manure takes Mou to replace LvG dat will sink dem eternally; d man is just too odious nd massively disgusting wit his proclivities; I cannt imagine a manager wit his kind of carriage at Old Traford; am nt a ManU fan bt I tink d club has history nd grt tradition a Mou will destroy abysmally; Mou has bin unmasked for who nd wat he really is dat has bin unknown to d football world, for his players like Cesc who nt too long ago proclaimed him d best Manager in d world to lead a 3 man musketeers against him speaks volumns abt Mou’s personage; for me , Mou. Shuld take a break nd rework himself bcos he apparently nids a psychologist’s counselling sessions to turn him around; pride goes b4 fall,nd God dispises arrogant souls,wen U sow d wind u reap d whirlwind,Jose nids spiritual, physical nd emotional rebirth b4 he can ever be successful again as a coach/manager in any club!