Continuing the week by week guide to fortune telling which exists in order to give economics forecasting a good name.
First off its The Guardian, and this is so good they needed two writers for it: David Hytner and Fabrizio Romano. Welcome guys.
Henrikh Mkhitaryan is a summer transfer target for Arsenal. They have sent scouts to watch the Borussia Dortmund attacking midfielder and have further monitored his progress via video clips.
This chap is 27, which as we showed in the recent article on the current team, is now on the old side. And he was going to join Liverpool! and also the Tiny Totts when at Shakhtar Donetsk, and the fact that he didn’t, tells us something about the sources of information.
He’s an Armenian international and has an unpronounceable name and he is “torn” (yes torn) “between renewing at Dortmund – for whom he signed in 2013 from Shakhtar for £23.5m – and considering a move to the Emirates Stadium. He would have no shortage of other offers from clubs across Europe.”
So he could go anywhere then.
Arsène Wenger is likely to lose Mikel Arteta, Mathieu Flamini and Tomas Rosicky from his midfield in the summer. All three are out of contract and not expected to be given new deals, with age and injury problems having caught up with them while there is uncertainly over Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain’s future at the club.
2: Granit Xhaka
OK we’ve done the Granit job but the Guardian article above wants to tell us again.
Apart from using up vital column inches writing Borussia Mönchengladbach in full we are told that Granit is a holding midfielder is a mere 23, and has an imposing physical presence plus skill and intelligent reading of the game, will carry Switzerland’s hopes at the European Championship in the summer.
3: Andriy Yarmolenko: Arsenal, Tottenham and Liverpool on alert
Never slow to move into an act the Independent tells us that “Arsenal, Tottenham Hotspur and Liverpool have been put on red alert after the manager of Ukraine has said winger Andriy Yarmolenko should move to the Premier League.”
Oh well if it’s red alert it must be a load of cobblers.
The 26-year-old has been constantly linked to a move to England, and the comments from the national team’s coach, Mykhaylo Fomenko, will only further speculation. The Dynamo Kiev winger has made 58 appearances for Ukraine, scoring 24 goals.
Rated at £25m, Yarmolenko scored the winning goal against Wales on Monday.
“Yarmolenko has been heavily linked with Liverpool! in the past two transfer windows, but the moves eventually came to nothing.”
Does the occurrence of Liverpool! in every single story tell us anything?
4: Yaya Toure
Not a time warp from me but a story in the Indy today. They even remember that Yaya once had a trial at Arsenal (Mr Wenger called him “very average”) “however a permanent move never materialised,” (which is patently obvious.)
Toure would add some additional experience to the squad, however the club are already blessed with an array of midfield options, which might make Toure a luxury they can live without. Wenger isn’t a fan of older players either.
So that would be a no then. And besides we made a whacking great profit out of his brother, and we’re not going to get away with that trick twice. But Stuart Pearce (yes that Stuart Pearce) says, “Arsenal need an old head within the team.” And what, I ask, is wrong with Koscielny?
5: DONE DEAL – ARSENAL ANNOUNCE FIRST SUMMER SIGNING AS WORLD WINNER SIGNS FIVE YEARS DEAL. CHELSEA BEATEN TO SIGNING
Yes it is in SoccerTransfers, I know you’ve had to wait and a biting at the champ [I think that’s champing at the bit, your Grace – Tony]
Arsenal have completed their first summer signing according to daily star. The Gunners have reportedly beaten the likes of West Ham, Bayern Munich, Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester United to high rated Nigeria under 17 FIFA world cup winner Kelechi Nwakali.
Actually I warm to SoccerTransfers. Anyone who can quote the Star without sniggering and then write daily star in lower case gets my vote. Well, gets my vote if the only other party is Donald Trump.
The Nigerian who has been named the new Patrick Vieira in some quarters.
Right. “… with reports claiming Tottenham were the keenest in the bid to sign the Nigerian but according to daily star, the player will instead be signing a five years contract with the Gunners.”
But “there is no official comment on this transfer from Arsenal” but don’t worry for that is “not surprising considering how the Gunners conduct their transfer business in secrecy,”
Blimey, one nil to the arsenal then (sorry Arsenal).
“Kelechi Nwakali is not coming back to Nigeria, he has gone to London to stay,” a representative told allnigeriasoccer.com “He will do pre-season training with Arsenal. It is no longer in our hands if he’ll train with the first team or the Academy, they know the best for him. His application for a work permit can only be processed after he clocks 18.”
6 ARSENAL TO MAKE POLISH STRIKER THEIR FIRST SUMMER SIGNING
But maybe that (see above) wasn’t it after all. Soccer Transfers says we’ve already bought someone else!!!!
The Sun says we’re selling Wilshere, and the Metro (rather slow off the mark this week) says, “Arsenal have decided to make Polish international striker Arkadiusz Milik their first signing of the summer.”
But look who else wants him. That bunch of criminals and crooks at Barcelona and Liverpool! yes Liverpool! But the Metro says we’ll get him.
Milik only arrived at Amsterdam last summer, in a £2 million deal from Bundesliga side Bayer Leverkusen, but now after having scored 16 goals in the Dutch Eredivisie his price tag will be closer to the £10 million mark, a figure still well short of the money that will be asked for Gonzalo Higuain and Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang who several papers claim are being linked with a move to the Emirates.
So far this transfer window (which ain’t yet open)