The Transfer Index: 92 players rumoured to be joining Arsenal, new West Ham competition, Wenger’s replacement

34 Replies to “The Transfer Index: 92 players rumoured to be joining Arsenal, new West Ham competition, Wenger’s replacement”

1. When I posted in Untold the use of “SPURS” as a sentence I did not present it as a ‘Competition’ it was in line with the bloggette which a humorous bloggette. So was the ”SPURS” post of mine.

   S P U R S

   In future please do not lower the standard of untold by claiming something which is not true. Thank you.

   If you believe that ‘Brickfields won this competition then to be in line with the high standards of publishing that Untold holds you should send Brickfields the winner’s prize of at least £1000.

   Any amount less would be an insult to the high standards of Untold and an insult to Bricksfields

   I have already presented this I do it again for the benefit of any spuds readers who may have missed it
   A R S E N A L

   A rsene’s

   R esolve

   S uits

   E very

   N own*

   A rsenal

   L over.

   * Yes I do know that the word begins with a ‘k’ and the ‘k’ is not sounded. I said this when I first placed it in Untold.

2. I think I’ll have to disqualify you for that Colario, not least because I seem to have lost my cheque book.

3. On second thoughts Colario you are right. I’ve given Ima the sack and will recruit a new correspondent to run the Index through the remaining weeks of the increasingly eccentric Window business.

4. Bricksfields. With a £1 000 pounds from Untold, now say you don’t have any spare cash to buy me a drink!

5. @Tony.

   I know all about being sacked, don’t I

6. W E S T H A M

   Not very good but I have given it a go.

   W etspam

   E asily

   S teal

   T he

   H ype

   A nd

   M oney.

7. Tony,
   Could I register a plea for the reinstatement of Ima.
   If I may say so, there has been far too little feminine input in Untold, right from its inception.
   On behalf of all crumblies who daily rely on this site for entertainment, please do not remove this fresh source of fantasy.
   It’s surely not much to ask. 😉

8. Weird
   Earwigs
   Secretly
   Tunneling
   Here
   After
   Midnight

9. Plenty of Vermaelen story’s around this morning.

10. Never in my life have I been so deeply touched by the response to a single message sent by me … I had sent the above message of my win to 20 friends …all Spuds fans , thinking that they would be more than happy for me .

    After all, when one wins a prestigious award from The Untold Arsenal Blog , possibly amounting to 1,000 Pounds (?) , I felt that they too would be ecstatic, instead these are the replies that I received !

    13 offered free sex by responding, “F#@K YOU!”

    4 offered free advice towards a healthy sex life by responding, “GO F#@K YOURSELF!”

    The remaining 3 enquired after my sexual well-being by asking, “ARE YOU F#@KING MAD?”

    PS – Charles , your half of the award will be in the mail , soon after I get my , …sorry our windfall ! Look out for it !

11. Ubuntu!

12. Ben Yedder (90) has only just moved to Sevilla, so hardly likely to move again.

    Probably not a wise idea to write the purchase price of our ‘incoming’ as they’re bound to be different depending on where you read them (e.g. transferleague says Xhaka cost £33.8m), unless you have an unimpeachable source.

13. Brickfields Gunners
    August 2, 2016 at 9:19 am

    You more than deserve your £1000 prize. Just a drink will do! 🙂 🙂

14. Amazing, but only 29 days left to reach 100 players linked!

    When
    Expecting
    Some
    Trophies
    Here
    Are
    Malarkey

15. Weirdo’s
    Eat
    Slippers
    Then
    Heave
    After
    Mastication

16. Whence
    Euphoria
    Simmers
    Thenceforth ;

    Hence
    Again
    Mediocrity ?

17. Who
    Ever
    Supports
    Tottenham
    Hotspur
    Are
    Moronic

18. We have a winner right here folks ! Damn , why didn’t I think of that ?
    Well done Kenneth !

19. If Columbus had been married, he might never have discovered America, because he would have had to answer all the following questions:

    • Where are you going?
    • With whom?
    • Why?
    • How are you going?
    • To discover what?
    • Why only you?
    • What do I do when you are not here?
    • Can I come with you?
    • When will you be back?
    • You deliberately made this plan without me, didn’t you?
    • You seem to be making a lot of these programs lately…
    • Answer me – why?
    • I want to go to my mother’s house.
    • I want you to drop me there.
    • I don’t want to come back – ever!
    • What do you mean, OK?
    • Why aren’t you stopping me?
    • I don’t understand what this whole ‘discovery’ thing is about.
    • You always do things like this.
    • Last time you also did the same thing!
    • Nowadays you always seem to do this kind of stuff.
    • I still don’t understand what else is left to be discovered!

    Have you experienced these questions??
    If yes, YES! YOU ARE MARRIED

20. With the Summer Games coming up shortly, here is a piece of history.

    Greek History

    2500 years ago a slave call girl from Sardinia named Gedophamee (pronounced Get-offa’-me) was attending the first athletic festival in Greece.This festival had no name.

    In those days the athletes performed naked.

    To prevent unwanted arousal while competing, the men imbibed freely on a drink, containing saltpeter before and throughout the variety of events.

    At the opening ceremonial parade of this first great event, Gedophamee observed the first wave of naked athletic males marching toward her and she exclaimed: “Oh! Limp pricks!”

    Over the next two and a half millennia that expression morphed into “Olympics”.

    Just thought I’d share this new found knowledge with you.

21. We’re
    Ever
    Shit
    Them
    Hammers
    Are
    Mumbling

22. My nephew little spud says brick is word for prick and run away laughing. Now I laugh too.

23. Always liked Vermaelen…but really cannot see it, nor am I convinced he works too well with Kos….but if out CMs are instructed to shield the defence a bit more in some games than maybe they did in TVs time, then who knows……

24. Seven leadership principles to learn from an eagle

    (1) Eagles fly alone and at high altitudes.
    They don’t fly with sparrows or other small birds.

    Stay away from (narrow minded people) sparrows and ravens, those that bring you down.
    Eagles fly with Eagles. Keep good company.

    (2) Eagles have an accurate vision. They have the ability to focus on something as far as 5km.
    No matter the obstacles, the eagle will not move his focus from the prey until he grabs it.

    Have a vision and remain focused no matter what the obstacle and you will succeed.

    (3) Eagles do not eat dead things. They feed only on fresh prey.

    Do not rely on your past success, keep looking for new frontiers to conquer. Leave your past where it belongs, in the past.

    (4) Eagles love the storm. When clouds gather, the eagles get excited. The eagle uses the storm’s wind to lift it higher. Once it finds the wind of the storm, the eagles uses the raging storm to lift him above the clouds. This gives the eagle an opportunity to glide and rest its wings. In the meantime, all the other birds hide in the leaves and branches of the trees.

    Face your challenges knowing that these will make you emerge stronger and better than you were. We can use the storms of life to rise to greater heights. Achievers are not afraid of challenges rather they relish them and use them profitably.

    (5) When a female eagle meets a male and they want to mate, she flies down to earth with the male pursing her and she picks a twig. She flies back into the air with the male pursuing her.
    Once she has reached a height high enough for her, she lets the twig fall to the ground and watches it as it falls. The male chases after the twig. The faster it falls, the faster he chases until he reaches it and has to catch it before it falls to the ground, then bring it back to the female eagle.

    The female eagle grabs the twig and flies to a much higher altitude, and then drops the twig for the male to chase.
    This goes on for hours, with the height increasing until the female eagle is assured that the male eagle has mastered the art of picking the twig which shows commitment, then and only then, will she allow him to mate with her!

    Whether in private life or in business, one should test commitment of people intended for partnership.

    (6) Eagles prepare for training. They remove the feathers and soft grass in the nest so that the young get uncomfortable in preparation for flying.

    Leave your comfort zone, there is no growth there.

    (7) When the Eagle grows old, his feathers become weak and cannot take him as fast as he should.
    When he feels weak and about to die, he retires to a place far away in the rocks.
    While there, he plucks out every feather on his body until he is completely bare. He stays in this hiding place until he has grown new feathers then he can come out.

    We occasionally need to shed off old habits, things that burden us, or add no value to our lives.

    Yes eagles never give up …

    So keep moving.

    Oh ,I almost forgot …eagles learn from their elders and superiors and not from their juvenile spud nephews!

25. ‘Ludos nonullos possum ludere, sed officia plora habeo primum agere.’

26. Quid est? Ego similis vobis aquilam Brickfields ratio!

27. @ Kenneth Widmerpool – August 2, 2016 at 3:53 pm – Gratias tibi !

28. Brickfields
    I see Arsenal as an eagle which is why we will always be superior to our chicken neighbors.

29. Mick-Amen to that!

30. And since we are on the subject of pricks , here is a sad tale of one of ‘them’ …lets call him ‘w’, who got married to what he thought was an innocent belle .That was his spud nephew told him ; but unbeknownst to the fool , money had changed hands .

    On the wedding night , the bride shyly told her new husband ,” My mother told me that tonight , you will take out your penis and consummate our marriage , and that I was not to be afraid . But I am nervous as I don’t know what a penis is or what ‘to consummate ‘ means .”

    When he heard this he was so pleased that his wife had less sexual experience than himself. Him always having taken ‘matters into his own hand’ all these years !

    So he opened his pants and proudly exposed his rising tumescence to his bride .But it soon deflated just as quickly when he heard her excitedly exclaim , ” Oh , now I understand , we are going to fuck , and a penis is just like a prick …., only very much smaller !”

    And that was the last we ever heard of ‘w’ and his spud nephew !

31. As I bid you all goodnight , here is a wise old saying well worth contemplating ….

    ‘ vir prudens non contra ventum mingit’

    A wise man does not urinate [up] against the wind.

    Am sure that some of you would not agree with me , and click the DISLIKE button , but at least give it a try to prove me wrong ! It’s not as if you’d get egg on your faces !

32. We
    Enter
    Stadiums
    Taking

    Handouts
    And
    Money

33. Missus say Prickfield good for brick with no humour. Nephew loves that. I say Brick lighten his load and humble like pebble. Too old to change like his leader.

34. W……Westham
    E………Enjoying

    S…….. Stadium

    T……..Through

    H……..human effort

    A…….. And

    M……Money