By Sir Hardly Anyone
Last summer we ran the Arsenal Transfer Index and recorded over 110 players who were coming to Arsenal in the transfer window. Of those only three actually made it – and they were only tipped at the last minute when the transfer was already under way.
What this actually means is that the tips in the media about who is coming are actually the most reliable tips there are about who is not coming, so I thought we really ought to run the series again and see if we can find more than 100 players this year.
And of course since it is transfers we are talking about I am cheating by starting earlier.
At least one of the names in this year’s first edition will be horribly familiar (at number 2) as he was there all the way through last summer. But it is interesting that one story stands out above all the rest – Goretzka, who is being tipped by most papers to be THE real actual not-messing-about player who is coming to Arsenal.
Quite why he is being tipped so often to come I don’t know, but it might just be true, so here are the basics…
He is German, he’s 22, and he plays for Schalke
So that is the top tip of the moment. Below we have the full and absolute list of the first ten players tipped to be arriving in the summer even though at this stage we don’t know who the manager will be next season. I do hope you are ready for this!!!
|1||Marcelo Allende||Deportes Santa Cruz||Attack m’f||Had 3 trials, training with first team. Signing today!!!!|
|2||Karim Benzema||Real Mad||F’wd||Definitely going to either AFC or Chelsea|
|3||Kingsley Coman||Juventus||Wing||On loan with Bayern this season|
|4||Ederson||Benfica||Goal||23 year old to replace Cech|
|5||Jose Luis Gaya||Valencia||LB||Man City winning the race|
|6||Leon Goretzka||Shalke||M’fld||£21m, 1 yr left on contract. Wanted to replace Ozil (Most quoted story by far)|
|7||Jakub Jankto||Udinese||M’fld||To play alongside Xhaka|
|8||Kylian Mbappe||Monaco||F’wd||The new Thierry Henry|
|9||Corentin Tolisso||Lyon||F’wd||French international, dreams of Arsenal|
|10||Jack Wilshere||Bournemouth||M’fld||75% of guys in the pub want him back|
Last summer the entire first team squad were all said to be on their way out, and not surprisingly most of them actually stayed. So far today (and these stories are simply those being hawked around today) four of the squad are on their way but since Alexis is being tipped everywhere to go, he is in twice.
|1||Alexis||Chelsea||Will play out contract and go on a free to Chelsea.|
|2||Alexis||Man U||Has already agreed deal (Most quoted story)|
|3||Krystian Bielik||Birmingham||City keen to extend loan for another year.|
|4||Bellerin||Barcelona||Barce will sign him; no, he is happy to stay|
|5||Campbell||Fenerbahce||Currently in talks to sign|
Of course if Man U have been talking to Alexis then they are guilty of tapping up, and so Arsenal should receive compensation and they should get a hefty fine, with their manager being banned from football for 10 years, their ground closed for 15 and a chemical waste tip placed there instead. (I may have got a bit carried away on that one, but I am sure you get the essence of the idea).
And here is a novelty – a list of players who are staying. This excludes the group that signed new contracts just recently – as that would make predicting a little bit too easy.
|1||Kieran Gibbs||Talk Sport|
|2||Alex Oxlade Chamberlain||Talk Sport|
|3||Jack Wilshere||Talk Sport|
So there we are, up and running and ready to roll once more.
You might also remember that when we did this last season we played a very childish but hugely amusing game of making up slogans to fit with the letters of club’s names as in
Arsenal not Arsene
Very happy to receive any more of those you want to throw in this time around.
If you would like to cast your mind back to the very last Index of last summer you will find it here – and quite an amusing read it makes too. And in case you can’t be bothered here are the three meanings of the letters Liverpool that we thought were rather amusing.
- League Is Very Elusive Remembering Past Only Option Left
- Lackluster Indifferent Value Entirely Representing Pathetic Over-hyped Obnoxious Losers
- Liars in vogue encompasses real passion on only losers
It will be a jolly summer – even though it is only just a couple of weeks into spring.
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