By Sir Hardly Anyone
The world of the bloggettas are getting frantic. The first deal is done and dusted, but where is the second deal? (And just in case you don’t want to wade through all the nonsense, the really naughty one is at the end).
Arsenal Set To Complete Second Signing For This €15.64M Star screams goonersden.com
Arsenal have made a move to sign Mauricio Brozovic by approaching his parent club, Dinamo Zagreb with a £12 Million bid for the Croatians signature.
Brozovic is currently on loan at Inter Milan with the Italian outfit having the option of signing the player permanently when his loan spell expires.
OK not that one then. How about
Arsenal Very Close To Completing 2nd January Signing– Reports from oohtobeagooner
Arsenal have received green light in their chase to sign Paris Saint Germain striker Edison Cavani, according to the Metro.
The Gunners have been monitoring the former Napoli striker over the past three seasons and their persistence could pay of in the summer as the striker edges close to the exit door at Paris.
Let’s move on
Deal Agreed: Arsenal are on the verge to finalize deal for French star says gibfootballshow.co.uk
According to the reports from Britain, Premier League outfits Aston Villa have agreed deal with Arsenal to land French star Mathieu Debuchy at Villa Park on a season-long loan deal in coming days.
Yes well, I think we’ve heard that one.
Next up is a very curious headline
Fresh: ‘When I sign, I Will Announce It’ Star Finally Hint on Arsenal Imminent Deal
and of course it comes from the very curious goonersden
Pep Guardiola has claimed it could be two years before he moves to the Premiership to fulfil his long time ambition of managing a Premier League club. This has fuelled speculation that he is sizing up a move to the Emirates.
Deal can be announced in any time,£37m Bundelisga superstar’s closing on Arsenal!
As some media sources have revealed, Borussia Monchengladbach’s director of sport Max Eberl has admitted Arsenal top target midfielder Granit Xhaka could leave the club, if a tempting offer is received.
“It depends a bit on our own sporting success, it depends on Granit’s own performances and of course it depends on the figures,” Eberl told WDR 2 radio.
That is socceraspects.com
Fresh Update: Arsenal Ready To Seal Deal For Un-happy Star As Their 2nd Signing
We’re back to goonersden and here we are back to the same old same old.
Arsenal are ready to make a move on long time transfer target; Edinson Cavani of Paris St. Germain in this transfer window.
Cavani and PSG coach Laurent Blanc are in a disagreement about the striker’s playing position.
Things are really getting bad when each bloggetta can’t make up its own tale of tripe.
But goonersden keeps on pumping them out. Here they are again with
Almost Done: Arsenal Target Finally Set To Complete Dream Move, Deal Will Be Announced Next Week
(Actually have you noticed how they do insist on Writing Each Word With A Capital Letter At The Start. If they had been on a copywriting course they would have learned in lesson one that It Makes It Much Harder To Read That Way).
Arsenal and Barcelona are locked in a transfer battle for the service of Celta Vigo forward Nolito, according to latest report.
Barcelona are said to be close to securing the forward of loan till the summer with an option of making the deal permanent.
Isn’t that a thing!
Actually I must slip in one non-transfer story at this point
Campbell & Elneny Dropped, Alexis & Walcott Start– Arsenal Starting XI vs Stoke City
That again is, oh who is it, oh yes, oohtobea gooner.
Now I know that Untold’s predictions of the team for games is often wide of the mark, but the absolutely certainty with which the site speaks really is a scream. Added to the notion that I am not quite sure how Elneny could be dropped having just signed.
Deal Agreed: Arsenal set to complete the transfer of international
This is futnsoccer.com from whom we don’t hear that often. And you can see why when you read that
Arsenal have agreed a deal with Aston Villa to loan out Mathieu Debuchy till the end of the season, according to reports from the Football Insider
Just one more for now…
Done Deal: Arsenal Striker target Spotted At Club To Finally Seal Deal
And yes I had to include this, because the “spotted at” stories have virtually vanished since Untold did the “spotted in the estate agent” spoof.
Now this one is from goonersden of whom it has been said, and it is most clearly tagged under Arsenal News, and appeared on a number of news accumulator sites.
And what do we read?
The agent of former AC Milan striker, Alexandre Pato is said to be England to finalise a transfer of the striker to English Premier League Champions Chelsea in the January transfer window, according to reports.
I’d call that just about the final insult.
Except there is one more
Arsenal set to agree £60m transfer for £80,000 a-week star
And this one really is a bit naughty.
La Liga champions, Barcelona are planing reinforcements in the summer after a two transfer window ban, that has been canceled and according to the latest reports Catalans will renew their interest for Arsenal star Aaron Ramsey.
Barcelona’s interest in Arsenal attacking midfielder just won’t go away and it seems it will continue until we don see Ramsey with a different Shirt.
Apparently when Barce were told that Ramsey had Cardiff DNA in his blood their spell checker changed Cardiff to Catalan.
And sorry about the English, but that’s exactly what the site says.
Footnote: from the publisher.
Whenever we publish one of Sir Hardly’s stories highlighting the nonsense, gibberish and downright tripe revealed in the past few days by the bloggettas there are always a few comments alleging that either Untold is no better than the bloggettas since we are doing our readers a disservice by highlighting their “stories” or else we only do it to make money out of advertising.
My thinking, as publisher, is that these stories and these are worth highlighting for several reasons.
One was the policy most of them had of misleading readers into clicking on the advert (which is the bit that does make a web site money – just being on the page doesn’t earn anything for anyone) when they actually wanted to read the story. Another was that these sites do encourage the preposterous view that the solution to any club’s “problems” is buying a player. A view that has until recently been propagated endlessly by the media as part of its constant attack on Arsene Wenger.
We’ve attacked this two ways – by showing statistically that most big money transfers don’t work in the first season, and 25% can be said to never work at all. And by pointing out the lunacy of the stories – which endlessly say that something has happened, which never happens.
And I’d claim a little success here.
The number of hits the bloggettas get as revealed on the news accumulator Goonernews has declined by about 50% since we started the campaign, and most of them have now abandoned the trickery that leads the reader to click on the advert rather than the continuation of the story. So I think we are having an effect.
But why bother? Why not leave them alone? Ah, that’s an interesting point, and a longer one and Untold will deal with that separately. But the Insult of the Day might give you a clue…
He hath a killing tongue and a quiet sword by the means whereof he breaks words, and keeps whole weapons. (Henry V)
Two from the Anniversary Files (more here)
18 January 2004: Henry used the instant free kick (without the whistle) approach to score in 2-0 away defeat of Villa. Arsenal won 2-0, Henry scored both, and Arsenal went to the top of the league. The 22nd league match of the unbeaten season
18 January 2015: Manchester City 0 Arsenal 2. It was a match which stunned critics of Arsenal, not just for Arsenal’s victory (Giroud and Cazorla scored) but the style of play in which Arsenal conceded possession to Man C for much of the game.