by Sir Hardly Anyone
Part 1: Sign the wonderkid
When we have the Metro quoting the Mirror and the Mail for a story whose origin is “according to reports” you know that reportage has got just about as low as it is going to go. But for the sake of the record, let’s give it a whizz. Because Arsenal are expressing “an interest in Barcelona wonderkid Abel Ruiz, according to reports.”
He’s 17, an attacker, has scored one goal, has played three times for Barcelona B and hasn’t played in the first team.
I wonder, could Arsenal keep on picking up youngsters like this? And does anyone tell the parents and the lad about the fact that, “according to Arsenal fans” (to use their language) Arsenal are appalling rubbish? Mind you Barcelona might have other things on their mind at the moment – like what league they want to play in so maybe they aren’t paying attention.
Part 2: Szczesny into battle
Another bit of non-news comes from Szczesny, a player who very famously fell out with Mr Wenger for smoking in the changing rooms. One wonders what the odds would be on him ever saying something nice about Mr Wenger, at least according to reports. Or indeed why people turn a statement allegedly made by Szcz into news, but apparently it is.
Sky Sprouts are going into Lawrence-land this morning with the headline “Wenger escapes FA charge
Hang on, I can’t believe I wrote that last sentence. Can we take it out Tony?
[No, I’m still laughing – Tony.]
Part 3: Reverse everything we’ve said before but never admit it.
But now we have a new twist on the Mesut story with the Metro proclaiming “Arsene Wenger wants Arsenal star to leave in January”. The complete reversal of all the previous stories they have produced in fact. So after a year of Ozil wanting to leave and Wenger begging him to stay, it is now the reverse.
It is indeed exactly as if The Party (as in “1984”) is now employing journalists (outer party members) to re-write the news on a daily basis. Which would mean that while the rest of civilisation has struggled to shake off the yolk of tyranny, football has regressed into the past. But then, football reporting was the origin of fake news with its rumour mongering.
Anyway according to the Mirror, Ozil has infuriated his colleagues in the dressing room, and now things are so chaotic at Arsenal that the dressing room runs the club.
Part 4: The light relief
Vlad Dragomir and Chuba Akpom scored second-half goals to give Arsenal a 2-0 win over Sunderland in Premier League 2 Division 1 at the Emirates.
Part 5: An unlikely first
The Gooner – well actually the Online Gooner with the magazine itself either having closed down or about to close down, I can’t remember which – agrees with Untold
The truth is Stan will only ever consider change at the top if Arsenal are at real risk of falling out of the Premier League’s gravy train. it is no longer about not qualifying for The Champions League. It is now only via relegation to the Championship.
That is about the long and the short of it. Stan never sells up no matter what chaos he has created.
Part 6: The Lower Profile
This one I really do like
“£34m Arsenal target Arda Turan is reportedly keeping a low profile at Barcelona having dropped down the pecking order under Ernesto Valverde.”
What really makes me smile is the thought that any footballer worth anything would actually consider signing a contract for say four years to work in a country which seems to be likely to be in a position in a year or two in which it will be saying “all foreigners out”. Am I the only person who reads the newspapers?
[I think I should explain to readers that Sir Hardly was attempting irony there, and indeed elsewhere. I know it is hard to tell, but that’s how it is with the aristocracy – Tony]
Part 7: The old story, already said to be rubbish by the club, returns in the Mail
I know I know, the Mail picking up old discredited stories and then re-running it as news. Quite impossible to imagine isn’t it?
Marc Overmars to return to Arsenal
That appeared in the Mail at just after 9am today. Didn’t I read an analysis of the origins of that story somewhere?
Part 8: Per Mertesacker is a very clever Arsenal defender, Garth Crooks has claimed.
I don’t really know what to say about that headline. It’s from a thing called “The Sports Review.” You couldn’t really make it up could you? Although if you could, you could immediately have a job with The Sports Review I guess.
Other recent stuff
- Red Star Belgrade v Arsenal: the team and early prognostications and whatnot
- Fifa and Uefa: the corruption continues. Is it really just limited to the world game?
- How do we know if match fixing is taking place or not?
Ozil has not help Arsenal at all in all competitions this season. If at all he has done anything for Arsenal so far this season, is, he has harmed Arsenal badly in their PL game against Watford last Saturday by failing to convert a clear and clean goalscoring opportunity to goal to give Arsenal a 0-2 cushion in the match that was presented to him on a platter to give to Arsenal with the pass of the game. But to every Gooner surprise, he declined the offer which subsequently led to Arsenal losing the match at the end in his trackback failing to stop Richalison from getting to Arsenal box where he got an unjustified penalty. Thus, making many Arsenal faithfuls to start thinking if it was a blip in his form as a result of his knee inflammation injury which maybe hasn’t strengthened that accounted for his lackadiasical shooting effort on goal that was easily saved by goalkeeper Gomez, or it’s his general form that has gradually started to decline. We’ll khow more about his form when he plays in the Arsenal away match against Everton on Sunday and also in their subsequent home and away PL matches against Swansea and Manchester City before as Gooners, we can pass our judgements on him on if Arsenal should keep him beyond this season or not.
We should all stop discussing Ozil. He’s really not that important. Plenty of good, younger players out there who have more hunger and desire to play for a big club like Arsenal. If it was Xavi, Ronaldo, Pirlo, Messi or Stevie Gerrard leaving then yes, we could justifiably start a debate on how to keep hold of the player.
Note: I was joking about Gerrard.
good afternoon arsenal funs!
been a while! (not that am a regular) but good to be back to the forum.
it has always been my concern as to why Wenger thinks he can actually
force a player to play for the club?! hasn’t he heard of the saying, ” you can take a horse to the river, but you can’t force it to drink”?
Ozil has no desire to play for arsenal, why put him on that pitch? i watched in utter shock as the Watford introduced substitutes to better their game, only for Wenger to make substitutions to kill our game…we had a chance to move in to the top 4 and we squandered!
like it or not, i think the problems at the emirates are by far deeper than the fans can be let to know
Oh, Özil… yes, he fouled the Watford guy, couldn’t stop the penalty and watched the second goal without reacting. I like the way the fans have a huge memory about what he’s done for the club. Btw, i think that the global warming is his fault too.
Kakoni…..if I were you I’d return to the closet and stick to wanking off to photos of your sister. Better still, go to LeGrovel and join the rest of the illiterati.
Among much fake news, ONE FACT is beyond doubt: Arsenal SHOULD have sold OZIL in the summer. The man has the backbone of a jelly fish(or a Walcott,same thing actually) and the self centred nature of a two year old denied a sweet. Prima donnas , however gifted, are poison in a team game and any wise manager knows this full well. Sadly, our club does not have a wise manager.
That’s not a fact, it’s an opinion.