by Sir Hardly Anyone
Our Rutland resident with a rundown on reality
Since our last flip around the players coming to Arsenal this summer (according to the media who know a thing or two, or well, a thing anyway) the list of new arrivals has slowed down this week, although we still have four new faces.
But the big excitement is in the departures lounge which is already overcrowded and could replicate last summer when everyone was tipped to leave.
And it must be no surprise that Bellerin is going because the press said that every day until 30 August last year and clearly someone has found last year’s note book left under a cushion in the pub and thought it was a tip list rather than a sodden oldie. So yes we’re off again because they’re all off again.
But let us retain tradition and start with the incomers…
1: Leon Bailey
Apparently “Leon Bailey has emerged as Arsenal’s next big target for this summer.” He is a winger with Bayer Leverkuzen and this season has scored 10 and given five assists. Talk Sport say Arsenal will need to pay £100m for him.
Does such a transfer seem likely after all this January’s activity? Leon Bailey developed in the youth ranks of Phoenix All Stars Academy, FC Liefering and Trencin. He was signed by Genk in 2015 and after a couple of promising seasons with them, German Bundesliga side, Bayer Leverkusen took him.
He has played 25 games for Bayer L. and scored eight. Interestingly there is a warning notice on his Wiki site which suggests some info about him might be wrong. Hmmmm. Beware the Wiki Police.
2: Lozano
It is noted that he is 22, has scored 10 goals in 15 appearances for PSV who are top of the Eredivisi. It is also said that Lozano has a tendency to cut inside to pick out a man, while he also possesses outstanding composure when goal bound. I couldn’t possibly comment.
3: Pablo Monreno
Now we are down to the child snatching list looking at the 15-year-old forward Pablo Moreno, according to Catalan newspaper Mundo Deportivo. Although obviously he couldn’t move until he is 16, and once the UK leaves the EU that will be 18. (Strange how none of the pro-leave newspapers actually focus on this fact. It’s going to give Man City and Liverpool a problem).
Along with other English clubs, Arsenal would try to sign the player at the end of the season, when his contract with Barcelona expires – if he doesn’t re-sign.
4: Jorginho.
This one looks like more of a wish list than hard information, but since most of the others don’t have any hard information to back them up I don’t see why we shouldn’t include it. Jorginho is similar to the likes of Santi Cazorla, or Marco Verratti of PSG. “He would be a great Cazorla replacement, which the club is definitely looking for, especially with Xhaka’s struggles as of recent.”
Mind you some people compare him to Xhaka which won’t please the Xhaka haters. Here’s the list…
No. | Player | From | Source | Information |
Update | Leon Bailey | Bayer Leverkusen | Talk Sprout; Football London | Cost £100m, he’s a winger or a midfielder who gives assists. Chelsea more likely |
2 | Karim Benzema | Real Mad | EPR Scouts, Football Transfer Tavern | Deal agreed £35m |
3 | Kerem Demirbay | Hoffenheim | TalkSport. Liga Financial, Star, AFC Fever | Midfielder, AFC price agreed, Liverpool want him. Price agreed |
4 | Fred | Shakhtar | Gibfootballshow | Arsenal to get him for £30m |
5 | Goncalo Guedes | PSG | Liga Financial | PSG must sell because of FFP, Arsenal have announced interest |
NEW | Jorginho | Napoli | Hot Stepanovs | Faster and smaller than Xhaka |
7 | Thomas Lemar | Monaco | ArsenalNewsHQ; Mirror; TalkSport | Deal confirmed; has rejected a new contract |
NEW | Lozano | PSV | Sport 360, Arsenal mania | Winger who can cut inside |
9 | Malcolm | Bordeaux | FootballBible, Sport Review, Gunnerspheree | Winger; everyone is interested; he says he goes in the summer. But might go to China |
10 | Lautaro Martinez | Racing Club de Avellaneda | Gunnersphere | Striker. Inter have offered €20million |
11 | Max Meyer | Schalke 04. | Football London, The Guardian, Talk Sport | Attacking midfield or playmaker |
NEW | Pablo Moreno | Barcelona | Mundo Deportivo | He’s 15 and his contract runs out at the end of the season |
13 | Jan Oblak | Atletico Mad | FootballBible; Gibfootballshow | Goalkeeper also wanted by Chelsea and Liverpool. 100m euros. |
14 | Richarlison | Watford | EPL Scouts | Midfield, Chels & Tots also; Arsenal miss out & Arsenal to hijack deal, both on same site!!! |
15 | Daniele Rugani | Juventus | Whoscored | Defender. Agent confirms |
16 | Wilfried Zaha | Crystal Palace | Liga Financial | Arsenal making a bid of £25m |
17 | Andrija Zivkovic | Benfica | Football Facts, EatSleepSports ArsenalStation, Telegraph, Giants, Tribal Football | 21 year old striker |
But now let us move on because we have two new sections for the transfer season…
Arsenal’s new manager
1: Conte
The Daily Express says it is Conte, and their source is of the highest repute: Paul Merson. Except to be fair to the pundit, what he actually said was “If I was on the board I’d go straight for Conte. He upsets people.”
2: Sarri
According to our old friend “Reports” it is current Napoli boss Maurizio Sarri who is lined up for the Arsenal top job and who is certainly not going to Chelsea. That is according to his agent Federico Pastorello. The Express, Football Italia, Mail, Daily Cannon and all the hangers on are peeking into this one.
“According to Italian agent Federico Pastorello, Napoli manager Maurizio Sarri would prefer the Arsenal job rather than the one at Stamford Bridge. It’s reported that the 59-year-old has a release clause in his contract that would allow him to discuss contractual terms with other clubs.” That is from the most amusing Hot Stepanovs website.
Oh yes and there is wild celebrating in Untold’s HQ with the Guardian adopting one of our words: “Wengerian.” Only taken six years to get it on their approved list.
The departure list.
Looks like our third table – the one listing all the players who are leaving – also needs to be started, and what with it being this early we could have a repeat of last summer in which every single first team player was said to be leaving, one way or another.
No | Player | Going To | Source | What’s the story |
1 | Bellerin | Barcelona | Star | Star readers have a memory span of less than 1 minute |
2 | Holding | Burnley | Mail, Mirror, Sun | £15m |
3 | Lacazette | Arsenal Fever, Sun | Manu Petit says he will go. | |
4 | Ramsey | Mail, Mirror, Star, Sun | Out of contract; and because of gross financial mismanagement AFC can’t afford him because of Ozil | |
5 | Welbeck | Arsenal Mania | Leaving at end of season | |
6 | Wilshere | Liverpool | Football London | Wenger says how much he wants Jack to stay, but this doesn’t stop the suggestions that he his going. Arsenal Mania has him closing in on a new deal. |
Finally here are two leaving snippets to keep you amused…
“Arsenal head coach Arsene Wenger is only willing to permit centre-back Rob Holding to leave the Emirates for £15m, according to a story.”
“Burnley manager Sean Dyche is allegedly keen on signing the 22-year-old, however, the club made no offers for the centre-half in January.”
“Bellerin is said to want out of Arsenal and would be interested in a move to the La Liga giants.The 22-year-old came through Barcelona’s youth system before making a switch to the Gunners in 2011. Bellerin was linked with the Catalan club last year but Ernesto Valverde opted to sign Nelson Semedo instead.” That’s in the Star. Well it would be wouldn’t it.
- Why Auba is the new Robert Pires
- Arsène Wenger on the English tendency towards nationalist bias
- The strange case of the residency of Roman Abramovich
pls dont sell jack Wilshere we still need him becuase some times Xarar is a problem.
Ha ha. Our sports media really are a bad lot.
It never ceases to amaze me how gullible fans are. If fans had brains, most of this tripe and click bait in the media would stop.
Everything is just guesses and speculation dressed up as facts. The clue? Look for a named source. It’s made up if they say:-
‘a club insider’
‘an unnamed source”
“a friend of the player”
“it is understood”
“allegedly”
….or if its by Neil Ashton, Jonathan Lieu, Spurs fan Martin Lipton or any of the many Guardian Journalists who should find another sport to write about.
“Arsenal’s new manager”
Damm, no one can keep a secret eh? 😳
Yet the “rumours” about Auba and Mikhi turned out to be true.
Well, we can’t have everything. Or can we?
@ para
You’re being highly mischievous or genuinely don’t understand. That’s like saying Jack and Jill are rumored to be moving in to the empty house next door when they’ve already been round to measure up for new carpets. The media are claiming they know who the new neighbors are going to be even before the current owners have decided they want to move out.
You guys are killing me, at least I cak save commenting so much!
Rutland and whatever it is council, I reported them as well! My friend faces me the best image, it’s the lead page in the dreadnaugjt class file!
😉 you’re welcome!
Tips hat! Gentleman!
Even plus Mustafi and xakha also cazola all Suppose to be out.