Transfers update an inside revealtions of doings at Untold Arsenal.

By Sir Hardly Anyone

Of course I don’t allow the staff to sit around watching TV all evening long – its bad for morale and bad for the soul, and the lower classes, should in my opinion, be kept busy with the basic tasks of life, until they bed down with the horses in the stables.  Only in such a manner can they learn their natural position in the world.

So this will be my last report of the evening as I anticipate the first gin and tonic to be brought in any second now.  And indeed as you will have heard the news at G&T time in England is that the Aubameyang deal has broken down.

TBR says Arsenal have been offered Porto striker Mehdi Taremi on loan.   The same outlet also says Fabrizio Romano has claimed that Ousmane Dembele has “no interest” in joining Arsenal.  Personally I don’t trust any of these reporter chappies.

Besides this sounds to me to be jolly rude, but I suppose that is what counts for conversation these days.  But what interests me in all this is how these scribblers and n’er-do-wells from docklands and the like seem to think they know everything.  Take the headline, Edu risks repeating major Arsene Wenger transfer mistake unless Alexander Isak U-turn made.   OK this piece was written by Aaron Catterson-Reid who is described as a “Football Trends Writer”.  I’m not sure what that is, but I doubt we’ve ever seen the chappie in the Toppled Bollard Public House, where most football deals are done.

But what the young scamp says is that “Arsenal technical director Edu and head coach Mikel Arteta could be about to make the same transfer mistake that Arsene Wenger did 12 years ago.   Despite sitting just two points behind fourth-placed Manchester United, the Gunners are yet to make any first-team additions in the January window as Monday night’s deadline fast approaches.”

That’s two points behind WITH A GAME IN HAND you young scallywag, don’t you forget it.

Anyway, this assumes that signing players is a good thing.   And yet as Untold has shown, of the clubs that spent the most money in the summer window, the only club that is showing even a two-point benefit over the previous season is Arsenal.   In other words for most teams buying players results in a decline in the team.   So not buying players means we are on the up!

And why won’t those scamps in the newspaper and commercial blogging industry admit this?  Because made up transfer rumours are an easy living.   And I ought to know (not that anyone pays me).

Football.London says it is likely that Nic Pepe is going, but they don’t tell us where.  They also make the backhanded compliment of saying “Arsenal have not made the mistake of buying or loaning a player who does not improve upon the currently available options and does not further their squad plan.”

On the other hand Nicolas Pepe Arsenal Exit Talk Played Down says Inside Futbol.

HITC says that “Rangers’ Glen Kamara could be considered a late option for Arsenal.”  Do these fellas really know what’s going on?

London World tell us that “Nicolas Pepe could be in for a move away from the Emirates Stadium before the end of the transfer window.  90mins are reporting that an unnamed Spanish side are “confident of agreeing a deal” for the Ivorian while there is also interest in the player from clubs in Germany and France.

When we get into the 90min site it says, “sources have told 90min”   Mind you they also say, “Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang is in talks to sign for Barcelona, while Eddie Nketiah has been attracting interest too.”

This is the modern world of scalliwags.   No one takes responsibility for a story.  It is always from someone else.   Of course you might say that Untold does the same, although I think this is a bit different since we openly gather the news from lots of different drainpipes, and tell you that, rather than suggest one particular story is true – which of course 99% of the time it isn’t.

Thisisfutbol say “Football writer Charles Watts (the Rolling Stones drummer) has said that if Arsenal are to make a Deadline Day move for anyone, it is most likely to be Alexander Isak.”

Sky Sports tell us that Auba went to Barceolona despite no deal, making it sound as if he went after the failure of the deal was announced.  I am not quite sure that is the right interpretation, but anyway it doesn’t seem to make any difference.

And just to rub in the preverbial salt HITC says that goalkeeper Matt Turner who we are told is coming to Arsenal, had a bad match yesterday and is now officially rubbish.

Anyway let’s finish with Auba.  Aubameyang previously said : “The only club I would leave Dortmund for are Real Madrid. If they don’t come calling, I don’t leave.”  Maybe he did, but if he did it was before he moved to Arsenal, so the phrase is meaningless.  Which is why the Mirror has published it!   See, I told you it was all gibberish written by rumbumpkins.

Right, I’m off to the stables.  Tony is going dancing as is his wont, and the rest of the gang has gone to the chippy.   If something happens, you can comment on it and get an award for breaking the big story that those of us who went out will miss.  Tony has promised to be back just before the window creaks shut or slams open or whatever it is the servants do.  If he doesn’t make it I shall jolly well have words with him while being served my breakfast in the office at 11.30am.  Now where’s that G&T?

Oh and don’t forget: Arsenal transfers: The 11 players highlighted in the media on deadline day