By Sir Hardly Anyyone
It has been something of an erratic week for the football fiction writers as Mr Wenger has wrong footed them twice – once by changing his line up style and once by beating the glorious Pep. However this has not stopped the scribblers noting some more players who will be coming our way.
New entries are cunningly notified by the word “NEW” in the left column (don’t worry, it will all start to make sense in a few weeks time), and entries which are either new or have changed during the past week are in bold.
The “New” players are still counted in the totals, its just that, in order to make it more exciting I’m not showing their numbers.
Part 1: Players coming in
| No | Player | Club | Position | Notes |
| 1 | Marcelo Allende | Deportes Santa Cruz | Attack m’f | Had 3 trials, training with first team. Signing today!!!! |
| 2 | Karim Benzema | Real Mad | F’wd | Definitely going to either AFC or Chelsea |
| 3 | Andrea Belotti | Juventus | F’wd | Sadly he has just signed a new contract |
| 4 | Iker Casillas | Porto | Goal | To solve our goalkeeping “crisis” |
| 5 | Kingsley Coman | Juventus | Wing | On loan with Bayern this season |
| NEW | Virgil Van Dijk | Southampton | Defence | Helps us play a back 3 all the time |
| 7 | Ederson | Benfica | Goal | 23 year old to replace Cech |
| 8 | Jose Luis Gaya | Valencia | LB | Man City winning the race |
| 9 | Ben Gibson | Middlesbrough | Centre back | £30m. Tottenham want him. |
| 10 | Leon Goretzka | Shalke | M’fld | £21m, 1 yr left on contract. Wanted to replace Ozil (Most quoted story by far) |
| 11 | Lorenzo Insigne | Napoli | F’wd | Liverpool! are on alert! |
| 12 | Jakub Jankto | Udinese | M’fld | To play alongside Xhaka |
| 13 | Sead Kolašinac | Schalke | Defender | Oh yes he has oh no he hasnt |
| 14 | Kylian Mbappe | Monaco | F’wd | The new Thierry Henry Story repeated all this week |
| 15 | Alexandre Lacazette | Olympique Lyonnais | Striker | Man City want him |
| NEW | James Rodriguez | Real Madrid | Midf/wing | Juventus Milan Man U all want him |
| NEW | Ivan Perisic | Inter | Midf/wing | Man U desperate for him |
| 18 | Kasper Schmeichel | Leicester | Goal | The man to solve our goalkeeping “crisis” |
| NEW | John Terry | Chelsea | Nasty | This story from the Daily Mail |
| 20 | Corentin Tolisso | Lyon | M/fld or F’wd | French international, dreams of Arsenal. Still being mentioned |
| NEW | Arda Turan | Barcelona | M’fld | He’s 30 years old |
| 22 | Jack Wilshere | Bournemouth | M’fld | 75% of guys in the pub want him back |
Last season all of our first team squad were tipped to be leaving. So let’s take a peek at part 4.
Part 2: Outgoing Players
| No | Player | Club | Notes |
| 1 | Alexis | Man C | Guardiola making £50m offer his summer priority |
| 2 | Alexis | Chelsea | Will play out contract and go on a free to Chelsea. |
| 3 | Alexis | Man U | Has already agreed deal |
| 5 | Krystian Bielik | Birmingham | City keen to extend loan for another year. |
| 6 | Bellerin | Barcelona | Barce will sign him; no, he is happy to stay |
| 7 | Campbell | Fenerbahce | Currently in talks to sign |
| NEW | Jenkinson | Newcastle | Just promoted, need players |
| 9 | Ospina | Fenerbahce | |
| 10 | Lucas Perez | PSG | He’s an “outcast” according to “reports” |
| NEW | Wojciech Szczesny | Napoli | Every newspaper seems to have this one. |
Such is the excitement about players going that Talk Sprout on their own have given us a new listing:
Part 3: Players Staying
Yes here is a novelty – a list of players who are staying. This excludes the group that signed new contracts just recently – as that would make predicting a little bit too easy. No one has followed up the Sprout’s lead on this exciting listing yet.
| No | Player | Source |
| 1 | Kieran Gibbs | Talk Sport |
| 2 | Alex Oxlade Chamberlain | Talk Sport |
| 3 | Jack Wilshere | Talk Sport |
Part 4: Management
The issue of Mr Wenger going or staying has bored everybody, and we’ve hardly had any big stories this week on the topic. The general feeling is that he is staying.
It’s also been a dull week for managers arriving – no new names to add to the list. Here’s the list thus far.
| Manager | Current club | Notes | |
| 1 | Ernesto Valverde | Athletic Bilbao | Also going to Barcelona |
| 2 | Diego Simeone | Atletico Madrid | Defensively minded |
| 3 | Thomas Tuchel | Borussia Dortmund | Attack minded |
| 4 | Massimiliano Allegri | Juventus | Also won the league with Milan |
Next, in a new element we now also apparently need a new…
Part 5: Coaching staff
Chelsea’s goalkeeping coach Christophe Lollichon is “set to” follow Cech to Arsenal .
So clearly still some solid work for the bloggettas and the papers to do. But 22 coming in and 11 going, and all with around 67 days to go before the window even opens and a mere 128 days before it tinkles into broken bits. Not too bad.
Anniversary of the Day:
25 April 2004. Arsenal won the League, at White Hart Lane, for the second time since Tottenham last won the league. The score was Tottenham 2 Arsenal 2 and this was the 34th league game of the unbeaten season. Lehmann (having conceded a penalty in the 94th minute) failed to return to the pitch to celebrate afterwards. Vieira and Pires got the goals.
All the Arsenal anniversaries of the day are shown on the home page.
Add into Alexis:
“Animal” Alexis Sanchez is staying according to Mr Wenger.
According to french newspapers, he is going to PSG, so you may add a line up there….
And in germany they talk about him at Bayern, so add a second line….
Hey Guys
Alexis Good, new he would, she didn’t remind me and it was 10/1 🙁
Alexis Staying, Giroud not for sale, upgrade required, unhelpful comments, has he seen fit to agree about who has to make way?
Masterstroke, counter City and the offensive/defensive unit split with a back three, negate their attack, providing cover for Monreal and moving him to his most effective third (the middle to top third) and asking Chambo to cover defensively, his weak area, only due to his lack of concentration and conviction about the necessity of defending.
Loved Iwobi on the bench and Theo not selected. Ramsey and Granit, the future. Keane please. RB in was that. LB please. Ryad, were else but us? Morata, swap for Eden, with cash. Leaving De Gea, Laporte and Aubamayang money.
Athletico will be downsizing, Simeone and possibly a couple others on their bikes. Key players are becoming available.
Now everyone is concentrating on the league, but Spurs got stumped, Chelsea face teams that don’t suit them, as do Liverpool. Palace are no flash in the pan, a lot of options, a lot of varied styles of player. A Ragged Everton, a early S’hampton, (pre exodous).
Was that an early election? Register, Vote, or suffer silently. I got called up by a party to assist???!! :/ and another job with Law, in my weak areas!?!?! :/
£900 richer than I was, £900 poorer than I aught to be this day, and about £8000 than I aim to be by the end of next month and a few commas and zeros behind what I am owed.
Fingers crossed, we’ve won the FA Cup, now lets see about the league officiating, it stinks.
Left ahead in France, Ivanka defends daddy in Brussels in front of Angela who invited her, don’t take candy from strangers or Daddy!
We will make top four and we go Elite this year and they better find the officials all kinds of guilty, because I will!
Cheers for the posts about Wembley funding, something similar about Brent Council regarding Suds, it will be a Hammers move rent thingy.
Peace + Love to all who can accept.
James makeweight for De Gea (£65m for £35), Kasper to emulate father, Vardy should make the switch there or to Liverpool. Drinkwater to move on?
Santi is an interesting one, he’d suit Barca on a free, to the ground. I couldn’t fault him, their midfield is weak.
CR7 Hat Trick, he’s the best ever, the will to win, is extreme, matched only by his ability. (I bow my head for the Emperor of Football)
Looking forward to Asano, once Rudd lets him ion the country, also Perez is prime, so only if we get profit. I like the number 9/RW.
I wont say that Toffee’s name, but, he’s improved everything this season, Suarez range of goals, bar the long range smashes, edge of the box bullet headers and Vardy-esque volleys.
😀
God I wish I knew what you were smoking Dwain!!!!
@ omgarsenal – 25/04/2017 at 10:33 pm – Is that what it was?
I was thinking that he was using some inbuilt translator or auto correct that had gone on the blink !
I do hope we get a translator on this site as we have so many people from the world over , writing in and expressing views in so many different ways . This app seems promising.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISi4E0NLx7c
Soon we will be able to understand the different dialects of the UK ! Then again , do we really want to hear what Jamie Carragher is saying ?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDaTTVR2JXY
Are people who speak POSH all from Peterborough ? Or all relatives of Victoria Beckham,(née Adams)?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLyPhCR4S1M
State Aid United raided by HMRC and arrests made, supposedly for Tax and NI fraud.
Toon – same thing, and Charnley arrested.
Waiting updates on these stories.