Arsenal Transfer Index Edition 6. 39 players joining the club; 13 players leaving.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By Sir Hardly Anyone

There are only 74 days left before the transfer window falls back into place with everything all over and done, and the glass shattered on the floor, and so far we only have 39 players listed who are going to join Arsenal this summer.  Plus 13 who are leaving, although to be fair we have to admit three of those  are Alexis.  Koscielny and Ozil have just joined the ranks of the departing.

What seems to be happening this year is that the same names are going around and around, whereas when we did this exercise last summer  the big rush was in the early days.

Are these journalists losing their knack when it comes to making things up?  I mean, if you can’t trust a journalist to do her or his job, who can you trust?

Don’t answer that.

Part 1: Players coming in

Players listed for the first time in this chart have the cunning entry word “New” written in the first column.  It’s all clever stuff you know.

No  Player  Club  Position Notes 
 NEW Tammy Abraham  Chelsea  Striker  Currently on loan to Bristol City
 2 Marcelo Allende  Deportes Santa Cruz Attack m’f  Had 3 trials, training with first team.  Signing today!!!!  Actually that was two weeks ago.
NEW Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang Borussia Dortmund Forward £80m to replace Alexis.  Man U want him
NEW Carlos Bacca AC Milan Striker He’s 32 years old.  Was going to WHU
NEW Gareth Bale Real Mad Striker Stan Collymore tipped this one.
6 Karim Benzema Real Mad F’wd Definitely going to either AFC or Chelsea
7 Andrea Belotti Juventus F’wd Sadly he has just signed a new contract
8 Joel Campbell Return F’wd Loan period ending
9 Iker Casillas Porto Goal To solve our goalkeeping “crisis”
10 Kingsley Coman  Juventus Wing On loan with Bayern this season
11 Virgil Van Dijk Southampton Defence Helps us play a back 3 all the time
12 Ederson Benfica Goal 23 year old to replace Cech
13 Emil Forsberg RB Leipzig Midfield He’s Swedish and he’s 25 years old
14 Jose Luis Gaya  Valencia LB Man City winning the race
15 Ben Gibson Middlesbrough Centre back £30m.  Tottenham want him.
16 Leon Goretzka Shalke M’fld £21m, 1 yr left on contract.  Wanted to replace Ozil (Most quoted story by far)
17 Amine Harit. Nantes M’fld Arsenal have given him a trial.  He is 19-years-old
18 Lorenzo Insigne Napoli F’wd Liverpool! are on alert!
19 Jakub Jankto Udinese M’fld To play alongside Xhaka
20 Naby Keïta RB Leipzig Right back Has refused to sign a new contract
21 Grzegorz Krychowiak PSG Def M’fd New in the sense that this is the first entry for him this year, but it is the third year he has been tipped to join us.
22  Koke Atl Madrid M’fld Replacement for Santi Cazorla
23 Dawid Kownacki Lech Poznan Striker the new Robert Lewandowski’
24 Sead Kolašinac Schalke Defender Oh yes he has oh no he hasnt
25 Kylian Mbappe Monaco F’wd The new Thierry Henry  Story repeated all this week.  He’s the 18 year old wonderkid
Up date Alexandre Lacazette Olympique Lyonnais Striker Man City want him. Story has just resurfaced in the Guardian.
27 Romelu Lukaku Everton Forward Dead cert to join AFC
28 Florentin Pogba St Etienne Defender Brother of Paul at Man U
29 Leandro Paredes Roma Midfield A story from last year now resurrected
NEW Jordon Pickford Sunderland Goal Although Mr W has said he is not looking to sign a keeper.  Man U, Everton and Liverpool want him
31 James Rodriguez Real Madrid Midf/wing  Juventus Milan Man U all want him
32 Ivan Perisic Inter Midf/wing Man U desperate for him
33 Kasper Schmeichel Leicester Goal The man to solve our goalkeeping “crisis”
34 Michaël Seri Nice Midfield Tottenham, Barcelona and PSG want him.
NEW Wojciech Szczesny Roma loan Goal Mr W. said that he is not looking to sign a keeper (allegedly) so everyone assumes it is Szcz’s return
36 John Terry Chelsea Nasty This story from the Daily Mail
37 Corentin Tolisso  Lyon M/fld or F’wd French international, dreams of Arsenal.  Still being mentioned
38 Arda Turan Barcelona M’fld He’s 30 years old
39 Jack Wilshere Bournemouth M’fld 75% of guys in the pub want him back

 

Part 2: Outgoing Players

No  Player  Club  Notes 
 1 Alexis Man C Guardiola making £50m offer his summer priority
2 Alexis Chelsea Will play out contract and go on a free to Chelsea.
3 Alexis Man U Has already agreed deal
4 Krystian Bielik Birmingham City keen to extend loan for another year.
5 Bellerin Barcelona Barce will sign him; no, he is happy to stay
6 Campbell Fenerbahce Currently in talks to sign
7 Jenkinson Newcastle Just promoted, need players
NEW Koscielny Marseille He’s just had enough
9 Ospina Fenerbahce Some are just saying “to Turkley”
NEW Ozil Real Mad They realise they should have kept him
11 Lucas Perez PSG He’s an “outcast” according to “reports”
12 Wojciech Szczesny Napoli Every newspaper seems to have this one.
13 Nathan Tella Southampton Deal done and completed

We’ll have some more names in a day or two.

Meanwhile just in case you would like to see how it all panned out last summer, here’s the final index with the full list of 115 players that we were going to sign.

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4 Replies to “Arsenal Transfer Index Edition 6. 39 players joining the club; 13 players leaving.”

  1. I’ve seen Tammy Abraham play a few times this season and he’s very, very good. Don’t know if he’s good enough to step up, but who’d have thought Dele Alli could move up two divisions and make such an impact. And of course Chelsea wouldn’t be keen to sell to us. Doubt if he’ll be at City again next season.

  2. · A newly married couple were sitting in a restaurant when they noticed an old lady starring at them from another table.

    · They smiled back politely and the old lady made her way to their table. ‘I’m sorry to trouble you’ she began. ‘but you look so much like my daughter. She was killed last year and I do miss her so.’ I wonder if you would mind doing me a big favour?’

    · The couple nodded compassionately. ‘It would give me such a thrill if, just as I am leaving, you would say ‘goodbye mum’ and wave me off,’ the old lady said.

    · ‘Certainly’ the couple replied. How could they possibly refuse? A few minutes later, the old lady gathered her belongings and stood up to leave and the two diners cheerily said ‘good bye mum’ as ‘mum’ left the restaurant.

    · Feeling good about themselves, the couple asked for their bill. After checking it they called for the manager because it was far too much.

    · ‘That includes the charge for the lady’s meal,’ the manager explained. ‘She said her daughter would pay.’

  3. I think that I may discovered the mystery of the missing crowd last Tuesday .
    It was a dastardly and evil plot that had its origins in this joke..

    SOMEBODY DECIDED TO CAUSE TROUBLE!!!

    He went to a RESTAURANT and after seeing every table being occupied by couples, he took out his phone and made a very loud phone call, saying,
    “My friend, your wife is here with another man just come and see”

    Nine ladies DISAPPEARED!!

    The guys ? Probably went off to a pub.

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