The laziness of the long distance myth maker and beware managers with guns

By Sir Hardly Anyone.

Of course on the day when we have the headline that “Greek football match stopped after team owner invades pitch with a gun” things seem to get a bit fuzzy.  OK I don’t go to matches in Greece, but even so.  This is getting a bit unnerving.  First West Ham after the most successful migration in the history of the universe have fans threatening their glorious benefactors and now an owner enters the fray, armed.  Well!

But at least some things run to plan, as the fact that with Arsenal having won two matches in a row, the bloggettas ande their paymasters have retreated to Option 1 – all the transfers that Arsenal ought to make but will be too stupid or slow to make, combined with a few that they are absolutely, certainly most definitively going to make.

And yes we are up to 44 players who are all ready to reject Arsenal because of their rubbish supporters.

Among the nonsense we have Arsenal fans (that is apparently all of them since the writer fails to say “Some”, demanding  Iwobi should be dropped and sold at once (Football Fan Cast)

Empty seats means Arsenal have gone beyond the point of no return (The Statesman).  Not quite sure who is not returning – if it is the absentee fans then that might be a good thing as I know quite a few people who would be delighted to leap up the season ticket waiting list, or move from red to silver membership.

There’s a huge injury concern relating to Mustafi – but we knew that (Arsenal Fever).

As so now the Incoming Players list…

No. Player From Source Information
1 Yacine Adli PSG Sport Review.  Talk Sport says the deal is certainly on for a mere £250,000.  Mirror says it is for sure. Barcelona Manchester City,  Bayern Munich and Juventus want him.  He’s a wonderkid.
2 Marco Asensio  Real Madrid Guardian Liverpool will pay up to £131m, Chelsea and Arsenal are also keen.
3 Leon Bailey Bayer Leverkusen Talk Sprout; Football London Cost £100m, he’s a winger or a midfielder who gives assists.  Chelsea more likely
4 Jack Butland Stoke The Sun, 101 Great Goals Liverpool also after this keeper
Update Karim Benzema Real Mad EPR Scouts, Football Transfer Tavern, Diario Gol, Guardian (a year ago) Daily Star (6 months ago) Deal agreed £35m.  No €60 million, Actually we signed him in Jan according to
7 Emre Can Liverpool Fourth Official Liverpool won’t give him an extension
8 Jasper Cillessen Barcelona Mundo Deportivo, Daily Cannon A keeper.
9 Kerem Demirbay Hoffenheim TalkSport. Liga Financial, Star, AFC Fever Midfielder, AFC price agreed, Liverpool want him. Price agreed
10 Leander Dendoncker Anderlecht Fourth Official Defensive midfield, creative midfield…
11 Abdoulaye Doucoure Watford Hertfordshire Mercury Goalkeeper.  Watford want to keep him. Tots want him
New Mohamed Elyounoussi Basel ESPN Norwary international forward
 12 Johnny Evans WBA Daily Mirror He’s the key man we need
13 Nabil Fekir Olympique Lyonnais Mail Arsenal’s number 1 target; attacking midfield
14 Fred Shakhtar Gibfootballshow Arsenal to get him for £30m
15 Willem Geubbels Lyon Football London 16 years old forward, Barce, Leipzig and Chelsea also want him
NEW Jose Gimenez Atletico Madrid Mirror They want Laurent Koscielny in return
17 Goncalo Guedes PSG Liga Financial PSG must sell because of FFP, Arsenal have announced interest
18 Lorenzo Insigne. Napoli  Football fancast An attacker, aged 26, Italian international
Update Jakub Jankto Udinese Teamtalk.  Metro says the agent is definately talking to Arsenal It’s either Arsenal or AC Milan
Update Jorginho Napoli Hot Stepanovs, Fourth Official, Express Faster and smaller than Xhaka.  But we don’t think Napoli would sell
NEW Geoffrey Kondogbia Valencia on loan from Inter FC Inter News, Sports Witness Was going to Totts
22 Kalidou Koulibaly Napoli Daily Mirror, Guardian Centre back; top priority
23 Alban Lafont Toulouse Arsenal Mania Goalkeeper, Boyhood supporter or Arsenal
24 Thomas Lemar Monaco ArsenalNewsHQ; Mirror; TalkSport. Star Deal confirmed; has rejected a new contract. All go!!!  But Man C have got interested
25 Lozano PSV Sport 360, Arsenal mania Winger who can cut inside
26 Harry Maguire Leicester Sky Sports Centre half.  Man U also want him.
27 Malcolm Bordeaux FootballBible, Sport Review, Gunnerspheree Winger; everyone is interested; he says he goes in the summer.  But might go to China
NEW Joao Mario Inter on loan at WHU Fourth Official Midfield, and said to love London
29 Lautaro Martinez  Racing Club de Avellaneda Gunnersphere Striker.  Inter have offered €20million
30 Max Meyer Schalke 04. Football London, The Guardian, Talk Sport, Express.  Contract ends this sesason Attacking midfield or playmaker. Liverpool battling with Arsenal
NEW Abulkadir Omur Trabzonspor Turkish football says Ozil recommends him Central midfield
32 Oguzhan Ozyakup Besiktas Mail.  Football London says Wenger obsessed the transfer Arsenal to bring back their ex-player at the end of his contract
33 Pablo Moreno Barcelona Mundo Deportivo He’s 15 and his contract runs out at the end of the season
34 Jan Oblak Atletico Mad FootballBible; Gibfootballshow Goalkeeper also wanted by Chelsea and Liverpool.  100m euros.
NEW Andrea Pinamonti AC Milan Sportskeeda; 4th Official 19 year old sensational striker.
36 Richarlison Watford EPL Scouts Midfield, Chels & Tots also; Arsenal miss out & Arsenal to hijack deal, both on same site!!!
37 Daniele Rugani Juventus Whoscored Defender.  Agent confirms
NEW Andre Silva AC Milan 4th Official Striker, Monaco want him (that’s a “huge blow”) but Arsenal have made a serious offer
39 Chris Smalling Man U Daily Canon, Sport 360, Daily Star, Guardian £25m will get him
NEW Luan Vieira Gremino Star. Liverpool and Tots want him.  Played for Brazil twice
41 Timo Werner Leipzig Arsenal mania, Sun 21 year old who has scored a multitude of goals
42 Ben Wilmot Stevenage Sportsmole 18 year old played a dozen or so games.  Totts also interested
43 Wilfried Zaha Crystal Palace Liga Financial Arsenal making a bid of £25m
44 Andrija Zivkovic Benfica Football Facts, The Record, EatSleepSportArsenalStation, Telegraph, Giants, Tribal Football 21 year old striker. “AFC cannot but have been impressed.”  Price is £52m

Those who are leaving

No Player Going To Source What’s the story
1 Bellering Barcelona / Real Mad / Juventus Star / Mirror / Bleachre Star readers have a memory span of less than 1 minute.  But we have “Bellering” (TM) Untold. The Guardian has him going to Madrid to escape Arsenal Fan TV.  Or Barcelona.  Mirror to Juve.
2 Krystian Bielik Birmingham Sky He wants to reignite his career and is not happy at Walsall where he is on loan.
3 Cech Retirement Mirror
4 Holding Burnley Mail, Mirror, Sun £15m
5 Lacazette Arsenal Fever, Sun Manu Petit says he will go.
6 Ramsey Mail, Mirror, Star, Sun Out of contract; and because of gross financial mismanagement AFC can’t afford him because of Ozil
7 Welbeck Arsenal Mania Leaving at end of season
Update Wilshere Liverpool, any one of 3 Italian clubs Football London, Mirror Wenger says how much he wants Jack to stay, but this doesn’t stop the suggestions that he his going.  Arsenal Mania has him closing in on a new deal.  Most say he is off to Liverpool or Man C.  But no he’s off to Itlay.

5 Replies to “The laziness of the long distance myth maker and beware managers with guns”

  1. You haven’t listed Luca Modric who is apparently up for a move back to England and according to the Express we cannot have Benzema unless we let them have Bellerin as part of the deal.

  2. Which of these strikers who moved clubs in the January transfer window do you think will score the most goals ?

    a) Alexis Sanchez
    b) P-E Aubameyang
    c) Olivier Giroud
    d) Theo Walcott
    e) other

  3. @MickHazel

    Except Modrić has a little thing called “a charge for perjury” in Croatia.

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