Transfer remnants: What exactly are Arsenal doing, and what is a Spurs fan saying?

By Sir Hardly Anyone

We’re almost there it is almost done – at least in terms of the buying.  And as you probably expected, despite all the frantic suggestions by the People Regularly Engaged in Spurious Stories (or PRESS for short) nothing is happening thus far concerning Arsenal in terms of buying, although Perez looks like he is on his way to West Ham.

But there has been a plaintive plea from a Tottenham supporter in the Guardian’s minute by minute coverage which I thought I might share with you.  The sarcastic “sobs” note in the first line is written by the Guardian staff, not me.  The comment seems to me to be totally reasonable, and why they have to denigrate a reader of theirs who has written in such a moderate and honest way says, to me at least, far more about the Guardian and its attitudes towards its readership, than it says about fan disappointed in the way his club is handling things.  Shame on you Grauniad!

This is the commentary in full.

“As a Spurs fan this window has been nothing but absolute torture,” sobs Kira Nelson. “We are used to Levy leaving it to the last nanosecond of the window and painful as it is to see us unable to compete financially with the big clubs, surely it would be nothing but an embarrassment to spend the entire summer chasing a player who, no disrespect to Jack Grealish, probably won’t get in the team? I’ve given up on us pursuing a Lewandowski or a Cavani but if you look at players like Bernard to Everton, Felipe Anderson and Yarmolenko to West Ham, even Seri to Fulham and Moutinho to Wolves. These are exciting additions and would be (mostly) affordable squad players if not first team regulars. Surely the board must want the club to push forward. If it does it needs to act fast because while I’m not suggesting those clubs will overhaul us, we are at risk of becoming outsiders rather than nearlymen. We’re falling behind. The fans want a squad able to compete for trophies and we want to keep our best players but the odds of both are dwindling with every passing window.”

Of course I am an Arsenal fan not a Tottenham fan, but I can appreciate honest, well-mannered support for a club when I read it.  Shame the scribblers can’t.

As for ourselves it is of course possible that just as I hit the publish button something on the BIG side of things will happen, but if so, I’ll put down my lemon and lime and do an update.  Or publish a new note.  Or something equally spectacular.   And then when the window gentle eases itself into the closed position (at least for buying) I shall leave the Toppled Bollard public house, and make my way back to the Independent Farming Republic of Rutland for a break from the burley hurley of contemporary life.

So for now, what of us?

1: It looks like Ramsey is staying and a new contract has been arranged.

Caught offside say Arsenal are to doing a deal, and the Express agrees, although the Times seemed to say that if he doesn’t sign we will still sell him overseas in the remaining days of the selling window.  One thing that is important in anything about Ramsey is that the writer must at some stage call him “The Welshman” so  there we are, we have.

2:  Sander Berge

According to a claim in the Norwegian media, Tottenham Hotspur and Arsenal have a ‘concrete interest’ in Genk midfielder Sander Berge and the player could be heading to England.  That is from Sport Witness.  I am not sure we have mentioned him before.

3: Ricardo

He is a Swiss left-back from AC Milan and the deal would cost £30m according to a man from the always unreliable Daily Mail.  

4:  It descends into farce.

Nothing Arsenal does can be done without it descending into face.  As in, “Arsenal’s transfer window descends into farce as structural problems remain,” says the Short Fuse. Not sure what they mean but I thought I would pass it on.

5: Just like the Book of Revelations

“Revealed: Arsenal’s possible transfers before Thursday’s deadline” says Arsenal Mania, which as it revealed nothing was rather akin to the Book of Revelations in the Bible saying, “Actually when the Second Coming happens, it looks like the Earth won’t end and things will just carry on.”

6: Revealed by the Express

“Arsenal transfer news: Unai Emery deadline day plans revealed – claim”  

That is the headline, and their revelation is also “ARSENAL won’t be making any more additions to their squad this summer, it has been claimed.”

Actually this was a re-run of the earlier “Arsenal transfer news: Unai Emery reveals likely Gunners plans before deadline day,” with a change of tense.  That’s cheating.

7: The Sun is not shining.

They have reported we are going to sign Domagoj Vida, but argue that “splashing out on the feisty Croatian would be a huge mistake.”  £25m is the price.   “It would be a mistake,” says Football Fan Cast (told you so).  He would be a direct replacement for Mustafi (that’s Arsenal Fever).

8: An unexpected name

“Jean-Philippe Gbamin has attracted interest from the Gunners after being in good form for Mainz last season” says the Mirror.  “He is a strong, pacey player who makes it hard for opposing teams to find space in behind. He also has the ability to play out from the back, which is necessary in a modern defender.”

9:  How vague do you want to be?

“Arsenal may receive an offer from a Premier League rival over a deal which could see the club sell one of the key players in the first team.”   That is 40 a day Football London.

They also told us that El Desmarque “have come up with a theory for one final twist in Arsenal’s summer transfer plans….

“Steven N’Zonzi has been lined up to replace Aaron Ramsey, with the Gunners still not confident of keeping the Welshman amid interest from Chelsea and other clubs.”

10. “Rwandan cultural dance troupe visits Arsenal training ground.” 

Glad we got that in.



5 Replies to “Transfer remnants: What exactly are Arsenal doing, and what is a Spurs fan saying?”

  1. I’ve said it before, but if you will insist ion reading the Gruaniad, an increasingly Marxist rag, then don’t complain when they act so true to form.. spread your horizons.

  2. Sir.

    Regarding the Guardians sarcastic response to the ‘reasonable’ Spurs fan.

    I must say I have a different take on it to you. Firstly, as well written and overtly ‘reasonable’ as the Spurs fans observations may be, are they actually that ‘reasonable’ in reality?

    Take this for example: “Surely the board must want the club to push forward.”

    Jeez, how many times have I heard that?

    Has Kira Nelson not seen the magnificent new Stadium in N17

    And this: “I’ve given up on us pursuing a Lewandowski or a Cavani”

    I’ll think you’ll find Kira that the days of Spurs pursuing the likes of Lewandowski and co are long gone. Surely Spurs modus operandi of recent years has been developing young talent such as Bale and Kane, or developing promise into fruition, such as Berbatov and Modric, and selling them on for profit.

    I believe Levy has pretty much operated on a net zero budget for the last 10 years or so. Quite an achievement.

    How on earth, given the extra financial burden of the new stadium would Kira think that is going to change any time soon?

    Yes, I know Spurs have spent a lot of money on occasion over recent years but that invariably has been on the back of the sale of one of their stellar players.

    To my way of thinking, the only way Spurs were going to spend substantial money, or perhaps even ANY money, was if they were again to sell there stars, and does Kira really want the likes of Kane or Son to be sold?

    And yes I know Levy has come out and said the Stadium cost will not impact on the transfer kitty, but I think I heard something similar to that before. I wonder where?

    What did you want him to say?

    ‘Sorry guys but I know the ticket prices are going up, and I know your expectations have risen to the roof, but frankly we’re screwed’.

    It aint going to happen.

    Spurs are in a position, like Arsenal were, where they have to sell out there brand new stadium no matter what, and sometimes the reality of the situation is not quite as conducive to that aim as maybe they would like it to be.

    So yes, it may be a ‘reasonable’ comment in tone, but in content, given where Spurs are, both in the Premiership and with there Stadium, it is, in my humble opinion, utterly ‘unreasonable’ and out of touch with the reality of Spurs situation.

    So as much as I agree it is perhaps an unneccersarily sarcastic put down in tone, I agree entirely with it’s premis.

    I’d go as far as to say, I wish they and others in the media, had tacken a similarly sarcastic tone to the legions of Arsenal fans constantly moaning at Arsenals ‘lack of ambition’ when they were in a similar position, as opposed to embrassing every insult thrown our way.

    Spurs, although not winning anything, have actually over the last few years been over achieving, and to start whinginging and whining, al la so many Arsenal fans, is to show scant understanding of the reality of the situation they are currently in.

  3. 11. Revealed: Sky Sports News has a Reporter!

    Doesn’t make any more sense than any of the hacks in the sprts medja.

    12. Breaking News: Arsenal Star decides to have Havarti on his Vegetarian Pizza!

  4. I’ve edited my comment and repost it. Sorry about that.

    Gruaniad or no Gruaniad, the fact is, it’s just under 3 hours now for the deadline day’s summer transfer widow to be over. But Arsenal are yet to be revealed in the public media to be involved in a 6th player singing today but they’ve signed 5 new players already this summer.

    But Unai Emery told us the Gooners sometimes ago in a media chat that he’s open to do a 6th signing for Arsenal before this summer window closes.

    However, all we can read happening at the Ems so far is the moving out of 2 Gunners from the club to 2 different clubs. One for a season long loan deal and the 2nd one for a permanent deal. But there are still some other Gunners on the fringes at club who have appeared to have hooked at the Ems making Arsenal outgoing transfer this summer and today looking to be a doubt as the club wants to offload them to reduce their wage bill burdens on the club. Thus, paving the way for the club to enable it have money for the wage bill of a new import the club purportedly intended to import before the transfer window closes this evening.

    And if one may ask, why is it looking difficult for Arsenal to get all the Gunners they want to off load off-loaded? Is it because they can’t get clubs to take them or these off-loading Gunners are refusing to vacate the club because of the lucrative wages they are collecting there but no other clubs who want them are ready to offer them?

  5. Karl Marxx was spot on though? Negative attachement to the truth, delusion.

    The Guardian is increasingly sounding like the mouthpiece of Jezza, they both talk shite.

    Spurs have done very well, Levy is an astute businessman, he’s used his contacts well and kept on the periphery, prepared to release something to the fans and press when necessary. 10/10 for moving his club forward. Realsitic, no not Robert, nor anyone else, and they are still a few pennies shy, Rose, is potentially off. I do hope they get Grealish, first and fullmost I am a fan of football, I want my enemies strong, so I can test my quality against them. It’s a London ting!

    Be careful about how you apprach religion, tabloids are already offending me for the use of the world Jihad, or Jihadi, I don’t make exceptions.Article 9, ahould not be cutrailed by article 10, mind how you go Sir Hardly Anyone.

Comments are closed.