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October 2016
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An interview with Arsenal supporting John-Bull-Brexit by Patrick Chigwell-Smith

An interview with John-Bull-Brexit by Patrick Chigwell-Smith.
So John, you support Arsenal?
Yeah, through and through.
What do you mean through and through?
Well I’ve got Arsenal in me blood, the old man put me in the supporters club at nine months-unlike you Johnny-come-lately-types.  I stand by the Arsenal at all times,Clock-End boy through and through,that’s me. You prawn sandwich fans have ruined everything.
So you like Wenger then?
No, he’s a bloody  idiot, we never win anything with him, I mean he was alright at the beginning then there’s been nothing. Years of just humiliation and he’s bleedin’ foreign. and I’ve had enough of them foreigners.
What about the recent FA Cup and Charity shield wins and the new stadium plus top four for a very long time?
Well, that don’t really count, not like the League and Champions league.And Wenger didn’t even buy no one last year. And we need a thirty goal a year striker.  My Granny can score better than Giroud. We haven’t had a decent striker since Henry.  USELESS I TELL YOU!
But Wenger bought Cech and Elneny,and we did make second in the league?
Yeah, but it wasn’t enough was it? If we would have bought more we would have won the league-makes sense doesn’t it? Look how many times other teams have won the FA Cup because they bought more players!  We’ve got loads of money in the bank.
How much do Arsenal have in the bank?
Dunno, bloody millions fleeced off us, the English,the working class fans. The papers it says about 250 million. Nicking a living the lot of them.  SPEND SOME EFFING MONEY WENGER!!
And you believe the papers John? Have you checked for yourself the stats they give out?  Anyway what papers do you read?
Look its like Farage says, we’ve been paying for them other countries for years. If we didn’t have these foreigners over here then we would win the World Cup.I mean, we proved it in the past, take 1966? Well, I read either the Sun, or the Daily Mail.  Honest I reads both of them.
But to people living outside of Britain, you happen to be foreign too?
Eff off mate,I aint no foreigner, I’m pure blooded English.   Look, I’m entitled if I pay nearly 60 quid to see a team I expect to win, I figure it’s my right,and we need a manager with a bit of spine and a bit of old English spit and brawl. Take your English breakfast over a continental anytime,if you know what I mean?
What you mean your Brexit FULL ENGLISH Breakfast?
Bacon from Denmark, Sausage from pigs reared in Holland, Baked Beans grown in Europe, Tinned tomatoes from Italy, wheat for the bread from Egypt and possible Europe and also 2 fried eggs which could be part of the 2,000 million Britain imports from Europe?
Eff off.  You’re just another of them posh liars,all Oxford and Cambridge. My mates a Butcher and he gets everything from England. Look I went to Marseille and we gave them Russian gits a right kicking and smashed up as many of them poncey cafs as possible. We won the war mate.We did it alone.We won at Dunkirk!
Are you sure about that John? Are you aware of what the Russians and Americans did in the war too, the idea we were alone is a bit stretched.  Plus the Polish played a big part in the Battle of Britain and at Monte Cassino, which doesn’t get talked about much.
I like a go at the Casino, -what that you’re on about? I told you I don’t like them Euro people! And your an insult to the war dead.  Look I’m telling you, we won the war and we used to control the planet, bring back the British Empire is what I say-its right and proper the worlds English,its not like we were unfair! And don’t get me started about the Germans! We stood alone, I’m telling you. Got to admit I like that Icke bloke though! My granddaughter Chardonnay had a book, I didn’t read much of it, but I know he’s right, I can feel it in me guts.
But John, David Icke says the moon’s a hollow base. Do you also think that the moon’s made out of cream cheese?
Do you want a effing kicking mate? I thought we had got rid off you posh gits.You wanna learn a thing or two from us working class. Salt of the earth mate, that’s what we are, the real people.You posh people have ruined football. Look Wenger out I say, I told you before I pay good money to see Arsenal win, not this tippy-tappy foreign game. Bring back George Graham, he was a good Englishman.
But John, George is Scottish!
Same thing innit! GREAT BRITAIN! Should be called Great England. Look, we are a pure blood nation. Farage proved it. Can’t wait for St.Georges day! Best thing was when the British Empire ruled the world,like I said.
But if if you look John, Britain is a mixture of all sorts of nations, we have been a proto-America since the Romans invaded, a boiling pot of all nations, a variety of culture and influence, music, writing and food and all traditions. Think for a moment how much the worlds cultures brought to Britain.
Eh? Eff off mate.I aint foreign.And that’s that.I voted LEAVE, to bring back democracy to England. Music? I like the Specials. Best band ever, now’s there’s a great English band! Music’s crap these days, not like when I grew up.I like the X factor though.
And how much have you been aware of EU policies since 1993?
None they’re a bunch of crooks! Look I’ve got other things to do like rather than follow them tossers! I hate politicians,the lot of them, mind you Trump’s got the right idea though. Bloody Yanks, cant stand them neither!
What food do you like John?
Food? Pizza,Steak and kidney pie, Indian after a lager session, bit of spaghetti, roast dinner and fish and chips-good English food! Good working class food!
How is it the working class are the best or most original John?
What are you on about now? We are the real people, none of this BBC ponce sh*te!I hate the middle classes and them toffs at the top.Though you don’t see them around much these days,can’t say I know any of them really nor met any. Good riddance!I’m mean what do they bring anyway, we do all the graft! Flick the V’s to them is what I say!
But John do you not think that all people are just people and it has little to do with class, that all the “classes” are just a lie and doesn’t mean anything at all? More how you are as a human?
Dunno, ain’t really thought about it.  All I know is me Grandad fought in the war to keep out them Germans and now look, foreigners everywhere.  Even Arsenal, riddled with them.I cant stand them!
John,whose you favourite Arsenal player in the current squad?
 Cazorla, Ozil,Sanchez.Great guys, brilliant players.
John whats your favourite tv programme and films?
Heartbeat, Love thy neighbour, Only when I laugh, Quadrophrenia. On the buses, TV’s crap these days.  Anyway I mostly watch Sky sports,and anything with old Ben Dover in it.  He’s good him.
John one final question. Do you think the referees are somewhat anti-Arsenal?
What you on about now? These ain’t some foreign ref you know! Of course not.Thats your poncey middle class excuses for defending the poor management from Wenger.  OUT I SAY! AND I DESERVE MY SAY! WE WON THE WAR!  WE WON BREXIT!

23 comments to An interview with Arsenal supporting John-Bull-Brexit by Patrick Chigwell-Smith

  • finsbury


    Sorry but whilst you muist have been DITHERING you forgot to mention that your Lord AW only ever had success with the Invincibles thanks to that famous and Grittish George Graham defence that the cheese eating surrender monkey inherited upon his arrival:


  • colario

    English killer.

    1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the Aussies, British or Americans.

    2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the Aussies, British or Americans.

    3. Africans drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the Aussies, British or Americans.

    4. Italians drink large amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the Aussies, British or Americans.

    5. Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than the Aussies, British or Americans.


    Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

  • omgarsenal

    Wonderful litany of working class mythology! Love the oxymorons happily sown among the flowers of ponce wit evident in this diatribe!

  • Brickfields Gunners

    Just bloody luv’ed it ! A brilliant piece !

  • WalterBroeckx

    off/on topic: some wise words from Adrian Clarke…. Do you read Untold Adrian? Do you? 😉

  • WalterBroeckx

    The like button doesn’t work at my end but I laughed a lot to be honest

  • Sukebe


    You are god damn right mate!!

    The invisible were 5 players only!!

  • finsbury

    Sukebe, correct those Invisibles only needed five players on the pitch at any one time.

    And when Mike Riley saw them he said:
    “Do I not like that”

    Let’s not be kidding ourselves here Riley is the kind of genius that believed at the time that Carlton Palmer was a better footballer then Matt leTissier (Dodgy foreign name haha!).

  • AKH

    Nearly had a heart attack! I thought untold had defaulted to YOUTUBE Arsenal Fan tv…….Then I read Colario;s statistical analysis….back to the real world thank goodness

  • Pat

    Having voted to leave the European Union because it is an undemocratic and destructive rich men’s club, and being an ardent fan of Arsene Wenger, not suprisingly I don’t find this particular article very funny.

    There is such an organisation as Labour Leave, you know, mainly made up of working class Labour supporters who have very well expressed reasons for opposing the EU. Perhaps you should look them up rather than serving up insulting caricatures.

  • Menace

    Maybe comedy but so close to reality that it isn’t funny. Yesterday a fat prat thought I should give him way because the ‘main road’ is where his car is. He was on the side road approaching give way markings but then he voted brexit so his brain did! The trick is to ignore the idiots because it makes them mad.

  • Hi Pat this is just for you.
    I feel exactly the same as you do and to make fun of people who voted to leave is an insult. I detest bad losers and people who seem to think that there way and only there way is right and how dare 17and half million vote against it. We make our decision’s in life and do so believeing its for the better good. If the vote had have been the other way I would have took it on the chin and accepted the majority vote and got on with my life to the best of my ability for my family and not go over it again and again. It’s why I lett Pat because no matter how much I love Arsenal and all she stands for and the man I have nothing but the utmost respect for in all good conscience I will not stand for someone telling me I voted the wrong way on a site set up for Arsenal, board, players and Arsene. I’ve learned quite a lot since leaving but I missed you and Meance and bjgooner and pop back now and again to see your posts. We all have a right to speak and air our veiw’s but what we should never ever do is laugh and make fun of people just because they have a different view. What better role model than Arsene Wenger who has the great dignity and grace both in victory and defeat and shows just what a total class act he really is. I hope you are keeping well and life is treating you well, have that voice nicely tuned for the start of the season. Best wishes Pat.

  • Pat

    I’ll be ready for the season, Linda, don’t worry! Thanks for your support.

  • Pat

    By the way, anyone who wants to find out more about the European Union from a critical point of view with plenty of analysis, I recommend the web site Campaign against Euro-federalism.

  • Yommex

    Thanks to the editor(s) for publishing the comments of @Pat and @Linda. We can always agree to disagree with REASONS without being discourteous. Why UA is yet to be rivalled.
    However, I see in the footballing cultures of the various clubs a reflection of the society at large so it is very difficult to completely dissociate both from each other.

  • Pat

    Hi Yommex. Don’t remember seeing you before. As to myself, I’ve been following and vocally supporting this site for years so I certainly do think it gives me the right to have my views published when I disagree with articles that actually have nothing to do with Arsenal or Arsene Wenger.

    What aspect of the culture of Arsenal wold you be referring to?

  • Kenneth Widmerpool

    I dreamt I saw Jo Cox last night,
    Alive as you and me,
    Says I to Jo you’re one month dead,
    “I never died” said she.
    “I never died” said she
    The political world,it killed you Jo,
    And some loathed the things you said,
    Then you were taken from this life,
    Says Jo “but aint dead”
    Says Jo “but aint dead”
    The frightened folk harassed you Jo,
    They smeared you with their lies,
    But says she “they could never kill
    What they could not compromise-and
    I never compromised”.
    “Though the Right wing hated me and now think that I have gone,
    The words that I have in said Hope means,
    The struggle carries on
    The struggle carries on”
    When words of freedom ring out loud
    From valley and from hills,
    Where people stand up for their rights,
    Jo Cox, is with us still, Jo Cox is with us still.

  • Yellow Canary

    What a condescending post. To assume all people who voted Leave are working class oiks is very dim-witted. Strangely reminiscent of the sort of reaction when someone questions Wenger’s management, obviously those that do are all Brexit supporters and short of intelligence. If only life were so black and white.

    I voted Remain. Two reasons, one because of all the money the EU plows into the UK, helping to regenerate areas that successive governments have ignored and under the abominable May will probably continue to do so and secondly because being in the EU means we have a voice in one of the most powerful blocs in the world.

    The referendum should really be ignored. It was not a democratic vote seeing as many of those who did vote based their vote on spurious facts and believed lies and false promises. This refers to both sides and I think many Leavers will be disappointed in the years to come when they realize they’ve been lied to.

    We do not send 350 million a week to the EU, Turkey is light years away from joining the EU, and yet we were told the opposite by blatant liars. Another Tory claim about reducing NHS waiting lists was then sneeringly denied the next day by some Tory MP who said that claim was just propaganda. The actual arrogance of these liars is stunning.

    The majority of the media and dodgy politicians wanted out to suit their own vested interests and of course leaving the EU won’t bother them. The well-heeled won’t pay the price, the poor will, as they always do.

    The ignorance of some people is amazing. In Norfolk I met a woman who was going to vote Remain then her father told her that there are 11 million immigrants in London so she changed her vote. There are only 7 million people in London.

    Yes I understand the concerns of some about immigration but the real enemy is not some desperate foreigner who has left his poverty-stricken country to find work but our recent governments who have failed to invest in forgotten communities and have failed to build large amounts of affordable houses. To do that you’d have to tax the high earners and God forbid the Tories would do that.

    The future is unclear. Whatever way you voted I hope you get what you want and I hope your vote was based on fact and not media hysteria or prejudice.

  • Yellow Canary

    Good post Kenneth.

    I listened to McCarthy this morning, Keep An Open Mind Or Else. Somehow I thought of Jo Cox, she experienced the “or else”.

  • Sorry Yommex but I have been here back and forth for along time and never once seen you but then we know fake accounts can be set up. The banner on this site refers to what it’s about not rubbishing or looking down on people who voted out because they had a different point of view to the people who run this site.
    Yes it affects clubs as you say but that’s up to the clubs to be smart enough long before the vote to place to look at ever possible scenario and what they would implement should it be in or out. Arsene Wenger will have been through all,of this and I trust him completely to do what he always has done and that’s to look out for the club he loves. I leave all that to the footballing genius that is Wenger. One more thing which I find, you don’t talk about people like the AAA and then go and do the very same thing thing yourself. This site was about honesty and in that honesty people have different options but also in that honesty no person has the right to make people look foolish or stupid because they voted a different way.
    Pat my friend good luck and the very best to you and you have just as much right to your point of view than anyone else and if you are like me and I think you are, always stand your ground when you truly believe heart and soul your right and put over your point of view never to hurt of look down on anyone but always do it with dignity. Just thinking Pat , that’s you in a nutshell.

  • Pat

    I hope so, Linda. I try.

    Working class oiks. The very term has a ring of prejudice. If it weren’t for the working class, none of the things we need to live – homes, food, transport, schools, clothes, and everything else – would exist.

    Yes, the working class created everything. So let’s show them a bit of respect.

  • Menace

    Nice poem Kenneth.

    Yellow Canary – every vote follows lots of lies. Democracy allows everyone to make their own minds up & to the victor the spoils.

    As for Iraq! remember Farzad Barzoft? did Chilcott even mention him?

    Lets just stick with the beautiful game that has no boundaries to entertain. I still have sympathy for the ball – everyone kicks it when it did no wrong.