By Sir Hardly Anyone
Unlike most members of the artisocracy I have never taken strong drugs except on doctor’s orders, so I don’t know if it is true that for the junkie each high fails to deliver what is actually wanted, but the belief remains that the next high will be the perfect high.
So I guess it is true for those fixed on the spoof sites – those little sites that promise the latest on the transfer front, but then deliver nothing. You know its a fix but then there’s one more headline and maybe this one is the true one.
Arsenal Finally Have Bid Accepted & Personal Terms Agreed For Striker Transfer
That must be it, surely, with that headline, and the sub heading that says
Arsenal are reportedly set to complete the transfer of 23-year-old star striker away from the Emirates Stadium this summer.
But oh what is this? Away? Joel Campbell looks to be on his way out of Arsenal, with the Gunners said to have agreed a deal to complete his transfer away from north London.
This report is according to popular Turkish media outlet Turkish-football, who claims the Costa Rican striker is close to sealing a move to Besiktas after agreeing terms with the Turkish side.
Now I have looked at the site Turkish-football and it looks to me as much like a spoof site as the ones that bedeck our own news aggregation sites. Is it true? If so, by the time we get there we’ll have forgotten all about it. Except that now it is on Untold, maybe I’ll come back and look.
Just to be annoying. But still, hold your horses squire, look at this…
Welcome to the Emirates as top-class striker OFFICIALLY signs with Arsenal
Arsenal have completed the signing of Barcelona star Marta, according to the Sky Sports website.
The 23-year-old joins having won four consecutive league titles with Barcelona in Spain.
The midfielder could make her debut this Sunday against Liverpool when the Women’s Super,League restarts after the break for the World Cup.
Well, yes, I think we’d got that story, but since 99% of the stories on Goonernews are about the men’s side one wonders if the headline writer didn’t actually deliberately try and draw us in.
But never say whatever it is that you are not meant to say because look…
Bid ACCEPTED – Arsenal Set To COMPLETE Transfer Of World Cup Striker
The next in line to depart is reportedly 22-year-old striker Joel Campbell…
Oh bugger. But still, just one fix, just one story that’s real, or almost half real…
I want to join Arsenal” – says £45m-rated star!
However, despite Cech’s obvious qualities, Wenger will be fully aware his troops need more strengthening in various other areas of the pitch.
Why is Carl Jenkinson being offered a new deal by Arsenal?
Well, actually because we need to cover ourselves against another round of unpunished criminal attacks on our players. I would have thought that is obvious.
But wait. Are you sure you know what to think. After all none of the blogs has told you of late.
After spending well in the last couple of windows on the likes of Mesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez, Arsenal fans are excited about the future and there could be some imminent signings very soon.
West Ham are also close to agreeing another season-long loan for Arsenal defender Carl Jenkinson, after the right-back impressed while at Upton Park last term.
The Metro is a turgid load of old cobblers, but at least they keep their headline writers under control
Arsenal and Liverpool transfer target Pedro Rodriguez admits he could leave Barcelona in the summer
ESPN FC put it this way
The 27-year-old Spain international only signed a new deal last month at the club, but already it seems as though he is set to end his 10-year spell with the Catalan giants. Arsenal have been heavily linked with the fleet-footed forward and Pedro admits his situation at the moment is “delicate”. Pedro created 25 chances in La Liga last season.
What is the meaning of “heavily linked”. Is that a chain with lots of big clunky bits within it? Doesn’t sound that clever to me.
Time to move on…
Tutto Mercato Web sayeth…
Athletic Bilbao are still showing an interest in Arsenal left-back Nacho Monreal, after the 29-year-old’s impressive displays last season. Monreal managed to dislodge injury-prone Kieran Gibbs from the left-back slot and was part of the club’s FA Cup success, as well as helping them finish third. The Spaniard was linked with Bilbao earlier this summer and whilst the interest that time cooled off, it has emerged again with Ernesto Valverde a big fan of the full-back. Monreal completed 85 interceptions in the league last season.
Come on come on I need my fix…
ALMOST DONE! Arsenal Set To Announce “Signing Of The Season” Star In Coming Days
According to popular and acclaimed football agent Muzzi Ozcan took to his twitter handle to announce Arsenal are close to completing a ‘major signing of the season’
Ozcan who primarily operates in the Bundesliga, played a part in getting Slaven Bilic into the managerial role at West Ham and also our very own Olivier Giroud.
However, the Daily Star has reported that the Spaniard has signed a 1 year extension with the Gunners.
Oh Arteta. I think we knew.
So there we are boys and girls. Still no fix. Still no further forwards. But you can’t say I didn’t try.
Was it Arsenal that implemented FFP laws in Europe?
We’ve got articles so far on every pre-season from 1996 to 2007.
These headline writers could get a job devising the cryptic clues for the Times crossword.
Fantastic summary of the transfer brickabrak that’s out there…always keep an eye out for Untold viewpoint in amongst the gooonernews confetti !
Why does the blog publish such articles on a daily basis linking us to every player on the planet when we know all the stuff is rubbish?
It’s all a bunch of ‘arse’
Let’s face it. We rarely know who we are going to sign until it happens.
Well done Arsenal for keeping it quiet. Thumbs down blogs, for writing shite.
Does the term “click thru ad revenue”
Mean anything to y’all out there…………..
What’s this?
Pedro is delicate…
I must check the Bleacher Report immediately….
Thanks for the tip Sir H…
we are already completed
Oh spare us please.
Methinks the point that ALL transfer speculation/reports/stories that appear anywhere except on the official Arsenal website are absolute nonsense has been well and truly made on Untold over and over and over and over again.
The repetition is starting to make me detest the silly season even more.
Any chance of the odd day where we just don’t bother?
Roll on August
I am not that much bothered by the likely untrue transfer stories on the online media. Because they have said it all – “Transfer Rumours”. Even the BBC website call it “Transfer Gossips”. I do read all those gossips or rumours as much as I can. Maybe those rumours are not totally false afterall as they say, there is no smoke without fire. The clubs like Arsenal are always monitoring, keeping tabs and making enquiries on every top quality player in the market and even those youths who have the potential to become top quality are not left out of being kept monitored by the clubs for a possible recruitment. Moreover, the media have taken this transfer rumour a very big aspect of their daily publications as I have taken note. Even immediately after the 2 transfer window of Summer and winter are closed, they still kept on publishing the rumours as if the transfer market will soon be opened for business to commence. This is the stage of the rumour milling I distaste. At least the media should give a gap after the market is closed before they can start to dish out rumours to feed us with. Nevertheless, I am waiting for that Arsenal big signing of the transfer window to happen. Who will that player be that will be that big summer transfer coming to Arsenal I searched my mind? Paul Pogba?, Gonzalo Higuain? Or Kareem Benzima? I won’t be surprised if any of the last 2 is brought in because of the injury state of Danny Welbeck. Because Arsenal can’t not tolerate a repeat slow start to the season again that saw us missed out on the title and even 2nd spot finish last season. The Gunners must take next season by storm and finish it by storm. Let the Boss not forget the issue of signing a top quality left back and a top quality right winger. Maybe is the signing of the RW that is referred to as the signing of the season that will happen.
I am not that much bothered by the likely untrue transfer stories on the online media. Because they have said it all – “Transfer Rumours”. Even the BBC website call it “Transfer Gossips”. I do read all those gossips or rumours as much as I can. Maybe those rumours are not totally false afterall. As they say, there is no smoke without fire. The clubs like Arsenal are always monitoring, keeping tabs and making enquiries on every top quality player in the market and even those youths who have the potential to become top quality are not left out of being kept monitored by the clubs for a possible recruitment. Moreover, the media have taken this transfer rumour a very big aspect of their daily publications as I have taken note. Even immediately after the 2 transfer window of Summer and winter are closed, they still kept on publishing the rumours as if the transfer market will soon be opened for business to commence. This is the stage of the rumour milling I distaste. At least the media should give a gap after the market is closed before they can start to dish out rumours to feed us with. Nevertheless, I am waiting for that Arsenal big signing of the transfer window to happen. Who will that player be that will be that big summer transfer coming to Arsenal, I’ve searched my mind? Paul Pogba?, Gonzalo Higuain? Or Kareem Benzima? I won’t be surprised if any of the last 2 is brought in because of the injury state of Danny Welbeck. Because Arsenal can’t not tolerate a repeat slow start to the season again that saw us missed out on the title and even a 2nd spot finish last season. The Gunners must take next season by storm and finish it by storm. Let the Boss not forget the issue of signing a top quality left back and a top quality right winger. Maybe is the signing of the RW that is referred to as the signing of the season that may happen.
I am not that much bothered by the likely untrue transfer stories on the online media. Because they have said it all – “Transfer Rumours”. Even the BBC website call it “Transfer Gossips”. I do read all those gossips or rumours as much as I can. Maybe those rumours are not totally false afterall. As they say, there is no smoke without fire. The clubs like Arsenal are always monitoring, keeping tabs and making enquiries on every top quality player in the market and even those youths who have the potential to become top quality are not left out of being kept monitored by the clubs for a possible recruitment. Moreover, the media have taken this transfer rumour a very big aspect of their daily publications as I have taken note. Even immediately after the 2 transfer window of Summer and winter are closed, they still kept on publishing the rumours as if the transfer market will soon be opened for business to commence. This is the stage of the rumour milling I distaste. At least the media should give a gap after the market is closed before they can start to dish out rumours to feed us with. Nevertheless, I am waiting for that Arsenal big signing of the transfer window to happen. Who will that player be that will be that big summer transfer coming to Arsenal, I’ve searched my mind? Paul Pogba?, Gonzalo Higuain? Or Kareem Benzima? I won’t be surprised if any of the last 2 is brought in because of the injury state of Danny Welbeck. Because Arsenal can not tolerate a repeat slow start to the season again that saw us missed out on the title and even a 2nd spot finish last season. The Gunners must take next season by storm and finish it by storm. Let the Boss not forget the issue of signing a top quality left back and a top quality right winger. Maybe is the signing of the RW that is referred to as the signing of the season that may happen.
Repeat slow start, sounds vaguely like repeating (almost) the same comment over and over again.
This blog does not allow people to edit previous comments, but there are still better ways to make corrections to a blog comment.
Most people will read the first comment, and if there are errors they may unconsciously or consciously make corrections. In any event, if your second (third, fourth, …) posting is nominally the same as the corrected version which is now in their head, all of your subsequent posting are a waste of time. Most people will interpret them as being exactly the same posting, and they will start decrementing the value of postings by people who post the same thing over and over.
It is entirely possible that the easy ways to correct a section of prose, are not correct. The best solution is to rewrite everything so as to differentiate the improved version from the first version. And by rewrite, I mean that the section of prose does not even approximately look the same.
But Samuel you need to find a different way.
I am still scraping by, currently fixing pieces in how to interpret 3 downloaded commentaries, and adding a new one with each iteration.
In the old days, these text commentaries would have been typed in manually, and a person needed to negotiate spelling mistakes, wrong word (there/their/they’re) and lot so of other problems.
I suspect that most people doing text commentaries now, are nominally using “special keyboards”. In practice, this is probably a set of nested menu’s in a GUI. The commentator may input the uniform number of a player (and tick home or away team), they don’t type in the name as listed in the game sheet or the proper name of the player (including diacritical marks). Is it a foul, handball, offside, shot, goal, …. Is a place to start. But the commentator is ticking boxes and drilling up/down through menus. All of the creation of one or more sentences based on all these choices is done by computer. Which gets away from most of the errors in spelling or choosing words.
I haven’t yet run across a text commentary which mentions a referee playing advantage. And hopefully this is something this is something that will be added in the future. Advantage is an uncalled foul, the attacking team has retained possession and can work with that possession. As Walter has said, there is (typically) no reason to play advantage when a defender is being fouled by an attacking player deep in his own half. Sure, there are unusual situations where advantage might be nice, but I think most managers and players would just as soon see the foul called and restart from a free kick.
But, with no indication of advantage in text commentary, counting called fouls before issuing a yellow card (or something) is biased. It may be, that this is the first time the referee had blown down play to right a foul. But maybe there were 4 instances of advantage before? In which case, issuing a yellow for persistent infringement on a “first foul” is probably reasonable.
In any event, I am trying to mark every foul from the point of view of the person who is fouling the opposition, as well as the person that is being fouled. In the first EPL game last year, Chamakh was fouling Arsenal players all game, he eventually got a yellow (presumably for persistent infringement), and still committed another foul after that. How many times does a single player rack up 10 fouls in a game, and is still not dismissed?
Of interest to many Arsenal fans, is how often is the first foul for an Arsenal player also a yellow card?
But, in trying to fit my program to observed games, there are lots of interesting things a person can learn. But, I have made a start. I do have other things to get back to.
is how often is the first foul for an Arsenal player also a yellow card?
Generally because ref don’t clamp down on the early getting to know you fouls from our opponents. For some unknown reason they are told to give a few calm down warnings before they reach for their cards. By the time we make a foul it’s generally the sixth or seventh foul of the game by which time the ref feels it’s time to clamp down on things and out comes the card.
It’s all part of their training probably from someone that has never played the game at a reasonable level.
we don’t need higuain he is 15goal last year we went benzema higuain is not 45m arsenwinger not buy this value 45m benzema 40m is good
Holy Keystrokes Gord, I almost understood some of that!
Must be getting tekkie in my old age:)
Hi Samuel, hi Samuel, hi samuel .
Almost makes me want to watch tennis.
This isn’t the first time I’ve come to this site on the lure of a deliberately-misleading headline.
If you want to prove a point then do it more honestly. Not to puts you right at the top of ‘click-bait’ websites which makes you just as bad if not worse.
Shame.
As for your section on Muzzi Ozcan – his ‘signing of the season’ tweet has no connexion to Arteta or the Daily Star so I don’t know what your implication is based on.
Shoddy.
His tweet may well prove to be hyperbolic, but we can’t know that yet. On the other hand, if you’ve done your job properly and contacted the relevant parties thereby giving you the inside track on this – I stand humble and corrected.
Oh, you haven’t. I thought not.
Just like all the rest.
Hans Rott, you have actually written to the site four times now. You are of course very welcome to do that, and we publish your posts, but I wonder, since you clearly have such a low opinion of the site (and certainly don’t enjoy the same type of humour as the publishers do) why is it you keep reading?
Would it not be better for your soul, and indeed your contentment if you just made a note and put it by your computer that said, “Don’t read Untold Arsenal”. Wouldn’t that make you happier?
” We suffer more from imagination than from reality .”
Lucius Annaeus Seneca .
Eonverye taht can raed tihs rsaie yuor hnad..
Only great minds can read this
This is weird, but interesting!
fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt !
If your auto correct automatically corrected that , then it is your loss !
Dear Tony,
Nice try at deflecting. But please just stick to responding to my post, thank you very much.
Although I can understand why you might not.
As for having a low opinion? This might be tricky for you to comprehend, but have you considered that I have been here considerably more times than four and not felt a need to comment so enthusiastically. (That I have read, absorbed, and moved on.)
No? Thought not. Which one has to wonder why? Since this is categorically the case.
Hans Rott, I think you have singularly failed to understand what is going on here. Untold Arsenal is a blog run by a little group of Arsenal fans with a similar viewpoint. It was started to cover a point of view that was thought to have been ignored by other blogs. we now have one million page views a month, and are trying to continue the service to those who want to see it.
So where within that scenario is the notion that you might think it a viable proposition to tell those of us running this site how to write and respond. And even if you did, telling me that something might be tricky for me to understand is hardly a good way ensure that your thoughts are posted.
Then you suggest you know what is in my mind. If you seriously do believe that, I would suggest that you think again – you’ve really got it wrong.
But enough – we’ve had our exchange. You’ve put your point, I mine. Let’s stop this.
Dear Tony,
The problem I have from time-to-time with your site is that you imply it’s different from all the others in one key respect: honesty. That it (unlike so many others) doesn’t entice viewers on the production of scurrilously false headlines just for the advertising revenue. But this is certainly challengeable, isn’t it?
It’s all very well making a series of ‘spoofs’ with titles like:
“Shocking revelation as Arsenal to sign amazing midfielder and complete trio of top signings”
“Arsenal finally have bid accepted for striker and complete the transfer of 23-year old striker”
“With this second signing will anyone be able to stop Arsenal?”
“At last at last! Player spotted at airport; van Persie sold without being told.”
… with the byline of “Sir Hardly Anyone”, but that doesn’t stop countless ‘punters’ clicking the revenue counter up, does it?
It’s disingenuous no matter the perspective.
And while you’re quite within your rights to claim otherwise it nevertheless remains self-evident that:
(a) Your headlines are worded to mislead.
(b) You accrue revenue on each hit.
(c) You are in full knowledge of the relationship between (a) and (b).
And no, I haven’t failed to understand what’s going on here. Nor have I failed to understand that the internet is (for the most part) ‘open view’ which extends your site way beyond “fans with a similar viewpoint”. As for telling you ” … how to write or respond”? If pointing out that you really ought to change your baiting headlines is what you mean then yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing. This article is unethical and hypocritical.
You say that I’m “very welcome” to post and be published … which is good. But in the end people like you (those who prey on the vulnerable) rarely live up to such sentiments and even rarer do they change their ways especially if they can claim that it’s all harmless fun in response.
The above piece was number one in the NewsNow ‘Top Stories’ for Arsenal fans. And it got there via a deliberate and fraudulent headline. A million page views? Sure. And just how many were honestly attained? Hypocritical doesn’t even come close.
How could anyone fail to understand what’s going on here when it’s so blatant.
HansRott
I think this really is going over your head.
The instant you see the post is from Sir Hardly Anyone, surely you know it is all to be taken with a pinch of salt.
Yes it can lure you in to click on that particular post, but surely that’s the point he’s trying to make isn’t it, but if you don’t get it or like it, don’t read on.
But choosing to read it, then taking it so seriously that you’re letting it rile you to the point of posting a reproachful response, is in total contrast to what it’s supposed to do.
All Sir Hardly is trying to do, with a bit of ironic humour, is highlight the devious, misleading nature of the headline writers, and how it lures you in, then lets you down with a story that as often as not totally at odds with the headline.
It seems in your case it’s working a treat, only it’s supposed to give you a laugh, not the hump.
Maybe good ol’ Hans is Sir Hardlying Sir Hardly?
Yikes! This could start an endless loop of sarcastic irony (whatever that might be).
Tennis anyone?
How Tony makes his money from those million hits here –
and some often comeback ,”…..considerably more times than four……!”
http://www.gocomics.com/darksideofthehorse/2015/07/04
Fill me up before I go , go ….
http://www.gocomics.com/savage-chickens/2015/06/22
why all this trash. if you don’t have any good things to write about Arsenal then keep quet. clueless writters
It’s the stoooopid tennis I tell ya, makes people go doolally.
All that shaking the head from side to side.
Cheer up bisi, golf next week then pretend football then real football.
The summer’s almost over, phew!
Porter
http://untold-arsenal.com/archives/44712#comment-846550
I suspect the data you want is available, but not free (yet). I got tired of waiting, I want that data.
Dec
I am not trying to obfuscate anything. If you have questions, please ask.
It is likely we are not that different in age (I am 55).
http://untold-arsenal.com/archives/44712#comment-846557
Appreciate that Gord, forgive my attempt at humour, I’m just amusing myself in the ‘no football’ season.
Top marks re the age, I’m a mere youngster at 54. I have no idea however as to what makes this gadget work or what kind of hocus pocus the guys have to conjure up to make my rambling gibberish appear on your screen. Mind boggling! I take my hat off to those of you who do. I do however appreciate the beautiful game and even a few of it’s cousins and particularly the mighty Arsenal (since 1970). Being the only Gooner I knew back then made the seventies a tad interesting if not downright dangerous.
Keep on doing what you’re doing Gord, I’ll fly the flag for the Arsenal Luddites and as soon as August comes around we’ll all have something more relevant to yap about.
Hans Rott: here’s where you are wrong this site does not get any income on each hit. We get income when a viewer clicks on one of the adverts that appears on the site, or buys one of the books we advertise.
Since I am a director of Websites and Blogs Ltd which owns Untold and a number of other sites, I tend to know these things, I see the reports from our advertising agency and I see the bank account.
Telling me over and over that I am doing one thing, when in fact I know I am not, and getting some basic facts wrong is somewhat tedious, and I think I have had enough. The only thing I would say is that not too many other sites would have let you get this far. This isn’t a debate or a conversation – it is just you telling me I am running a fraud. You have had several goes at this, and the point has been fully aired. Time to stop.
Is Damian Martinez staying with us?
arsenal must bay world class striker