- There’s a shortage of league tables just at the moment. I can’t think why
- Top of the league, and they didn’t get a shot on target
By Tony Attwood
Of course I don’t want tot bore you with all the Premier League data right down to the bottom, but since a lot of publications don’t wan to publish it at all, I’ll offer you a part of it. It looks like this:
| P | W | D | L | F | A | GD | Pts | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
9
|
8
|
0
|
1
|
14
|
5
|
9
|
24
|
|
|
9
|
7
|
0
|
2
|
20
|
10
|
10
|
21
|
|
|
9
|
6
|
1
|
2
|
24
|
7
|
17
|
19
|
|
|
9
|
5
|
1
|
3
|
19
|
15
|
4
|
16
|
|
|
9
|
4
|
3
|
2
|
11
|
9
|
2
|
15
|
|
|
9
|
3
|
5
|
1
|
16
|
9
|
7
|
14
|
|
|
9
|
3
|
3
|
3
|
14
|
13
|
1
|
12
|
|
|
9
|
3
|
3
|
3
|
10
|
10
|
0
|
12
|
|
|
9
|
3
|
3
|
3
|
10
|
13
|
-3
|
12
|
|
|
9
|
2
|
5
|
2
|
11
|
10
|
1
|
11
|
So even with Tottenham and all their larking about, and ManC and their billions of pounds from places they shouldn’t have got it, we are still top. If there is a criticism to make it will be the lack of goals where we are fifth equal with Ipswich and Bournemouth, but this in part is down to the fact that we are most certainly the team everyone plays with a 12 man defense (11 players and a ref on occasion), but that can be put right over time.
Yet we must admit, we do have the best defence, and although that is not as sexy or exciting as scoring the most goals it most certainly helps.
I have not taken the table right down to the bottom but you might like to note that three clubs have only won one game from their first nine, and that is relegation form. Those three are Sunderland, Nottingham Forest and Manchester United, the latter this season are probably going for the trophy on how many managers they can get through in a single campaign.
We’ve been watching for the first sacking of the season, with ManU being the most likely candidate and indeed the Guardian has joined in with the rather cynical but true observation that “Unusually, all clubs in the top flight have the same manager with whom they began the season – but the first sacking may not be far away.”
And of course once the gates are open all hell breaks loose with managers moving thither and yon at the speed of men who have been used to a very decent salary and absolutely no desire whatsoever to give any of it up. After all, being out of work is a pain in the arse, but being out of work as a football manager is twice that because you keep bumping into them in the labour exchange. For once another two or three weeks have passed the media will have stopped mentioning you as a available as more and more ex-football men join the pool of job seekers.
Over half the managers in the PL were given their jobs during this year – an extraordinary number which I suspect is an all time record, but I can’t find a reference volume that actually counts manager sackings in relation to the number of days they have survived. So maybe, as the Guardian loyally suggests, they “have to be given a chance to fashion their side as they see fit.”
But that seems unlikely given the way the market has moved in the past and I suspect it is possible that as well as looking at the lists of the unemployed, one or two teams might even try their luck with a Championship manager who seems to be doing ok. After all, working in the Championship he might well know a few lower league players that other Premier League club have so far missed.
So just in case we want to do a bit of boasting about having tipped someone unlikely to get a job in the top rank, here is the top of the Championship: Middlesbrough, Swansea, Wolverhampton Wands, West Brom, Southampton. Now all of those teams have each lost at least one game, and in fact most have lost three, and the idea is to have a manager who doesn’t lose any more, which really brings us down to Middlesbrough with just one defeat this season. Kim Helberg anyone?
The only problem is that the next manager to leave looks likely to be Michael Carrick and I can’t see the board at Man U being willing to appoint a Championship manager. So they are more likely to go for someone who has got their team to the top of the league in a country that we never think much about. Latvia?
Anyway, for first ejection from the managerial chair at the moment we are probably looking at Crystal Palace, Sunderland or maybe Nottingham Forest.
One very cruel thing that goes on however is that the bookies have a computer program that predicts who the next manager out will be and you can even put a bet on it. Sunderland are the bookies favourite if you want to bet. (AFC to win the league have worse odds). But as some of the media point out, they did ok last season for whom they are, and had a really rotten set of fixtures at the start of this campaign, playing five of today’s top seven already. So maybe it is someone else. Maybe by the time you read this, he will already have gone….
