The wildest rumours: an overview and an exclusive

By Walter Broeckx

You know that at Untold we are rather sceptical about the transfer rumours that are being delivered on our doorstep by the more serious media. But we cannot ignore them completely of course. But as Untold is not to be considered that serious at times we will talk about a few and an exclusive.

Let me start with the exclusive. Our own Tony is  on a trip to Barcelona. To see the Sagrade Familia? To do a tour at Camp Nou? To walk along the Ramblas? To lie on the beach? No, no, no and no. The main reason apart from drinking and dancing is to see if he can persuade Cesc Fabregas to return to the Arsenal. Will he succeed? As we have lost contact with him we don’t know if:

a) Tony is still sleeping forgetting to put his alarm clock

b) Tony has made contact and Cesc said YES and as a result Tony has celebrated this and now is lying on his bed not knowing where he is for the moment. Silently waiting for the headache to go away.

c) Tony has made contact and Cesc said NO and as a result Tony has been drinking his sorrow away and now is lying on his bed not knowing where he is for the moment. Silently waiting for the headache to go away.

d) Tony has been dancing all night as there was a big party in the hotel he is staying and he now is still recovering while sitting in the sun, enjoying his juice and having his blisters nursed by his dance partner.

So far, so Cesc we could say but you know that Untold is wanting to walk the way to make the squad stronger. Even with blisters.

Let us move on to other times. Or to The Times. In my younger days (that is some time ago)  this was the newspaper that was seen as the most reliable of them all. Since then a lot of water has been flowing to the sea and I have heard that since some time the  reliability is not that big any more. But anyway The Times said that Fellaini was on his way to Arsenal. And I have contacted my sources and yes we will see Fellaini in the Emirates next season. Well if all goes bad at least at one moment in time. That is whenever he plays with his team against Arsenal.

Of course I could be proven wrong later today (don’t think so) or tomorrow and we might present him as one of our new players. But I think that those hoping that the promised by the media “new record signing that would be presented within 48 hours” will be him is on a scale of 0 to 10 a good -5. First is that he is in Belgium where he has to play against Serbia later today. So I don’t think the Belgian manager Wilmots will allow him to come to the Emirates to pose for a photo shoot today. Not even going by the Eurostar.

And the second thing that is making me rather careful about this rumour is that despite my search in the Belgium media I couldn’t find anywhere a link to Fellaini joining Arsenal.  And the Belgium media is not as sensationalist as the English media (yet).  And as Fellaini is from the French speaking part of Belgium I even checked the Belgium French newspapers and not one word about him going to Arsenal. So forgive me but I’m not really convinced by the Times this time.  Of course anything can happen.  And one day someone taking a gamble with a name might turn out right. After all someone wins the Euro Millions lottery from time to time so why wouldn’t someone predict an Arsenal transfer before it happens. Hell even I might win the euro millions tonight.

Next Rooney. OK, thanks fine, see you later. Surely Messi should have been in the picture but as we are not sure he can do it on a cold February evening in Stoke we better leave him where he is.

What more did we see? Ah, Aleksander Mitrovic. My first search linked me with a Serbian basketball player. Who would be standing tall at 2.01 meter. But I then thought that we are not a basketball club unless Stan Kroenke wants him for his NBA club. But there is also a young Serbian striker with that name so I think it will be him they are talking about.

And this 18 year young man plays for Partizan Belgrade. In his first season in the Serbian top league he played 25 games and scored 10 goals. Don’t ask me anything about assists or so. I haven’t got a clue. But in this case the devils came to my aid. Because as the Red Devils (the nickname of the Belgium national team and I think you have a clue why I really really cannot support them at any time) play against Serbia this evening I might be able to have a bit of a closer look.

Now watching Belgium (those f*cking red devils) is usually a no go for me. But tonight and only if my wife doesn’t offer to do something else I might have a look.  Usually I do whatever she proposes to do when Belgium is playing – and she knows that when Arsenal is playing all and everything has to step aside. A good marriage is build on good agreements.  Back to Mitrovic. Because this Mitrovic will make his debut for Serbia so the newspapers in Belgium have told.  They said he has a style a bit comparable to Lukaku and Benteke. And if the newspapers in Belgium can be believed he should cost around 10M euro.

Finally just want to say that it seems that he can be a naughty boy also. Because in the 2012 European Championship for U19 teams he got sent off in the opening match and missed the rest of the tournament.

So what do I think of all this? Well I think it is again much to do about nothing. Rumours been thrown around by the media in a desperate attempt to get hits and sell paper. And the more you hear about a possible target the less likely it is going to happen. I think we should have learned that by now.


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75 Replies to “The wildest rumours: an overview and an exclusive”

  1. What went wrong ,Tony , did the soya ferment ? Or was it all that churning during the dancing that did you in ?

  2. I detest Brussel sprouts? Belgium has a lot of great things associated with it, chocolate, Magritte, Brel, beer, but sprouts is not one of them.

  3. Not sure why I put ? that after saying I detest Brussel sprouts because I really do detest them. My parents tried to make me eat them because they’re good for you, apparently. Vile things.

    Can’t we just forget about football for a month? All these stupid rumours about buying Rooney and various other big names is bloody boring. Doesn’t anyone on here discuss anything else, and I’m not talking about your favourite vegetable, (mine is onion)?

  4. Good to see a different side of yours Mr Cook.

    Is onion a vegetable???…..I hate onions though.

  5. @Rupert

    I thought rats were omnivorous and would eat pretty well everything.

  6. Walter,
    My info is that Mr. Attwood has gone to Barcelona to see whether he can push Barfa over the edge into de facto bankruptcy so that he can finally make good on his ceaseless prediction of that because they continue to buy our pricey best and thereby drill holes under their waterline. I don’t mind if he succeeds, as it would finally end that line of self-congratulation which has little to do with the relative soundness of our Barca-Trade.

  7. Rupert Cook,
    No football for two months? Ok, then how about the weather? Your Brusells sprouts won’t mean much if the soil can’t sustain.

  8. Rupert Cook,
    “Can’t we just forget about football for a month? ”

    Well you did for a whole season, or at least forgot to watch your supposed team.

  9. @Stuart, good one. I appreciate a good come back. Seldom get one on here. Didn’t miss much though did I?

    I’ve never grown vegetables Bob. Just go and buy them at the supermarket which is lazy I know. As for the weather they promised sun in London and it’s raining.

    @Arsenal 13, I think it would be great to actually see other sides of posters on here. I know some only live for AFC but I have interests in plenty of other things like books, films and music. If we saw posters as rounded human being we might actually lose some of the hostility that rears up the minute anyone has a different opinion, something I always thought was allowed in a free society.

  10. Rupert, I don’t like sprouts either, but it turned out they was always overcooked (mother love), now when my missus lightly boils sprouts I eat them and enjoy them. Go figure.

    So the moral of this story is; find a woman who knows how to cook.

    Sorry if some of our female friends are offended by that, it was not my intention.

  11. Arsene will do whats best for the club with regards to signing players, but I do hope he goes for Adrien Rabiot, one for the very near future.

  12. @Adam, my wife is a pretty good cook. She detests sprouts too though.

    My perfect dinner would be an exceptionally hot curry. The wife berates me when I overload my stir fries with chillies.

  13. I ate something yesterday that didn’t agree with me and I’ve come out in a rash. NICE.

    Have you tried lightly boiling them? Sprouts that is.

    I love a curry, my other half used to work in the best Indian restaurant in the country, every time we go in there we get treated like royalty and she cooks up quality dishes from scratch, not bad for a Slovak.

    If your in London Rupert, try the Regency in Queensbury.

  14. I will try the Regency. We live in west London so should be easy to get to.

    Lightly boiled sprouts, if I ever get the courage to touch one I’ll try that.

    I remember having one of the worst curries ever in the Czech Republic so if you’ve found a Slovak who knows how to cook a good curry you’re a lucky man.

  15. Rupert, true story for you;

    We love sea food in my house, my boy has been eating mussels since the age of 1.5 years old, he races me, and wins. Anyway as stated, we eat a lot of mussels. Now I live next to the river lea, it runs through my garden and we throw left overs in it for the fish and ducks.

    My next door neighbor who is in her late 70s said to me one day “have you noticed we have fresh water mussels in the river”.

    I stood there quietly.

    She said “I even went in to fish a few shells out to show my son”.

    I stood there silently trying not to laugh.

    She carried on “I spoke to him on the phone and we both agreed it has been years since we have seen this”.

    Unable to keep quiet anymore, I explained that I knew the breed of mussel and that it was a Scottish variety from sainsbury’s and promised to stop throwing the shells in the river.

    She is now very careful about what she says to me. I wonder why?

    Anyway this a bit of revenge from when we first met, she thought I was the removals man and when I told her I was moving in next door, you should have seen her face drop.

  16. @ Adam, does your wife know ANY decent places to go for a curry in Northern Slovakia? (and I don’t mean goulash and curry powder!)

  17. Robl.

    I think your going to be hard pushed to find a decent Balti in Northern Slovakia, I was thinking Poprad or Zilina so I had a look on Google, but it laughed at me.

    Asked my missus and she laughed as well(I’m not joking).

    I found five indian restaurants in Bratislava and one in Kosice. but non where your looking. Are you in Slovakia or going?

    If you find one, let me know, i want to take a picture next time I pass by. We drive across the north over to Humenne.

  18. Yes Adam,Queensbury seems to be the place for curry. I had curry at a place called Everest, apparently it used to be called something else and has just changed names. There is another Everest up the road in Edgeware, not sure if they are related. We went on the night England played Republic of Ireland. It was by a country mile the best curry I have ever had, so much so that I’m thinking of taking the wife for what would be a 50 mile round trip.

  19. Stuart, go to the Regency. Blinding food cannot praise the place enough. Book in advance.

    If you understand the demographics of the area then you will understand this; If the locals eat there, the food must be good.

    You can also park it in there and watch the football on a big screen, open kitchen, friendly banter. Top venue.

    Maybe I’m bias as we get treated so well?

    I know one of the chefs from the regency opened his own place not long ago, maybe the Everest is it, there is another in Stanmore somewhere?

  20. yeah, we passed another one on the way. My boss is a regular around those parts and knows all the chefs and restaurant owners, he took the people I was with to another restaurant before and said the chef moved to everest. The building used to be home to a pub but now it’s a restaurant with a bar area and it too was full of the locals. Good sign, will definitely be going back there, maybe I’ll try out Regency some time too.

  21. @ Adam,I work out there near Zakopane, but on the Slovak side by the big lake. The food is great but just occasionally a curry or non potato related vegetable would be nice. There are a couple in Krakow but it’s a bit of a mission.

  22. Robl, so your not far from Poprad, I bet its nice out there. You had any flooding?

  23. Untold restaurant review.

    We went to Gordon Ramsey’s Boxwood cafe, left hungry and was ill the next day.

  24. I hope no-one is recommending spuds – unless they have been well mashed!

  25. @ Adam, no flooding here, we’re at 600 metres – near Namestovo. It is beautiful and you can hear the wolves at night.

  26. @ bjtgooner (or buffoonery as my blackberry thinks), sadly there is no like button!

  27. Yes, when I typed it I thought, hang on a minute? Mountains?

    How long are you there for? or is it permanent?

    We have had trouble travelling to the in-laws since they stopped the flights to Poprad, do you know of a quicker route? we have tried Kosice & drive, Bratislava & drive, Rzeszow & drive but all take ages.

    When we could fly to Poprad it was only half a day, but now we are talking a day maybe more.

    Any help would be appreciated.

  28. @ Adam, been out most of last year for work, will probably drop to 33% next year. We fly into Krakow as it’s in only 90 minute drive, however you can fly to Warsaw and get a cheap hopper service to zakopane. There maybe regional transfers to Poprad still?

  29. I have just looked up where you are Rob and I drive past there when we take the Bratislava route. next time I’m stopping off.

  30. It looks lovely up there. What do you do out there, if you don’t mind me asking.

  31. I presume you mean the overnight train. Done it once and wanted to kill by the end of it, never again. Also done London to Prague on a coach, never again.

    On the way home, at the German border they pulled me off the coach and rummaged through everything of mine. I went ballistic, they explained the reason for me being targeted is that I was the only person on the coach who was an EU citizen. Go figure?

  32. Yep, been there too, it was 15 hours late from Russia into Warsaw and more full of loons than the last night bus. Never drunk so much in my life, which was smart considering the ferry afterwards.

  33. Adam, sorry missed the previous – the company I work for has an electronics factory out there, it’s a bit concrete in the town as the original one is under the lake, but the mountains etc are stunning.

  34. Enjoying the discussion guys, even if I don’t understand half of the things and places you’re talking about 🙂

  35. Sorry, we got carried away in our search for the mythical Slovakian curry.

  36. Robl

    I wasn’t being sarcastic. I was actually enjoying the discussion. I fully agree with Walter. Keep at it.

  37. Hi Walter, sorry we hijacked your post! The noble search for a curry is (from my part at least) a football displacement activity, that helps avoid all the crap (present company excepted) excreted by the press over the transfer window.

  38. Now as I’m not an English speaking person I really wonder (and I may sound dumb) what you mean by “a curry”. I was hoping to find it out and I think it is Indian food. But to be honest I have never eaten such food so I have no clue what they eat.

  39. Well at least Untold cannot be accused of being unoriginal.

    Bit of background for people unaware, Slovakian food is gorgeous but could be considered bland, compared with, say, a lamb bhuna or Bhindi Lamb, they don’t eat any Lamb really which for me is a problem. Lots of Pork and sausage, chicken. You go around there markets and its all fresh food no real junk.

    Although they love a sweet (Austro-Hungarian influence).

    I’ve never had a spicy dish out there, but they have the climate to grow hot chillies. Go figure?

    If you like soup it’s the place to go, I think they probably have ten soup recipes for each day of the year.

    Anyway you know how it is, you get used to your conveniences, then you go somewhere else and miss them.

  40. Walter

    It’s actually the British version of Indian food. As far as I’m aware, no dish in India is called a curry 🙂 (There is something called kadhi but it’s something different)

    I think the word curry just refers to use of some indian spices in the food’s preparation. Most of the famous ‘Indian’ foods that I’ve heard of in the UK, are actually British adaptations, and aren’t Indian at all. But I suppose that happens to foods of all cultures when they cross over to another area. I know we’ve done that to Chinese food for instance 🙂

  41. Adam, thanks for making me feel hungry 😉

    It does look different to what I usually eat when I come to the Emirates 😉

  42. Oh man. I just looked at the photos of that regency restaurant, and I am officially inviting Adam and Walter to India to have the real thing 🙂

  43. Sorry Walter, but if you knew me and my family we have that effect when discussing food.

    When your next over I will treat you.

  44. Delhi. Better yet. Come over to London within the next two weeks and then tag along with me to India and all the glorious street food. Just hang on to your stomach 🙂

  45. Now let me see Shard when I can come over 🙂 As long as I can watch the Arsenal games I am willing to travel all over the world 🙂

  46. Thing is Adam I just started a bit of a diet because after the league ended over here I had few “heavy” weeks with lots of dinners and I have to lose a bit of weight to get back to my competition weight before the start of the season 😉

    I will give a few typical Belgian food after the next article that will be published tomorrow 😉 Untold the website that always surprises you ….

  47. lots of vegetables, avoiding meat (and I am a meat lover…) and potatoes.
    Sandwich in the morning, cold vegetables at noon, warm vegetables in the evening with cheese…and apples in between. And trying to train one hour each day. for 5-6 days. If I can stick to that diet I can lose 1,5 to 2 kg in one week.

    no chocolate (and well Belgium is famous for chocolate…), no biscuits, no fried stuff including the french fries who are not french but from Belgium in fact. Bastards, they take everything away from us. 😉

    But a bad day tomorrow as one of my children insisted to do a BBQ and so I will have to be very careful to not eat to much meat. But the whole family coming home for it so will do enjoy it nevertheless.

  48. Wow. 2 kilos a week. That’s fantastic. Although I suppose it also depends on what diet you start out with in the first place. I need to lose weight. Ever since my injury 5 or 6 years ago, my weight has shot up dramatically because my exercise levels have gone down (for fear of having a re-re-injury) but diet has remained the same (including unhealthy food) The last time I was in the UK though, I lost about 4.5 kilos in under 6 weeks, mostly due to all the walking I did exploring London. Hopefully I’ll lose something similar this time and can then maintain that impetus to keep losing weight.

  49. @Adam, liked your mussels story. We live five minutes from a canal so I could engineer a similar scenario, the people living on houseboats would be confused. There are several lock cottages too so plenty of locals to fool: we live very close to a group of locks called the Hanwell flight.

    I drove around Europe for three months twenty years ago. Went to Zakopane and Poprad and all over the neighbouring countries to the north. Drove all the way to Estonia. Tried to get into Belarus but they turned us back at the border. The previous year I drove all the way to St. Petersburg. My first wife was Hungarian, though I never visited the country with her.

    Some years later I married a Russian and lived in Moscow for three months.

    Those colourful days are over. I’m now married to an Oxfordshire lass. Travel expenses have decreased immeasurably.

    @Walter, surely you’ve had a curry? It’s the great British delicacy. A few years ago it was voted Britain’s favourite dish.

  50. Rupert, I didn’t “engineer” it, that is how it turned out. Still feel a bit bad, but hey ho. Would love to have caught her rummaging around in the river.

    BJT, cruel mate, but funny.

  51. @rupert(depressive AAA sewer rat who claims he is a stud)

    Sounds like easy come easy go for you; but of course in the dark of the AAA sewer one could make a bad mistake!

  52. I always think : it’s not about getting the right lady, but about keeping her 😉

    Or I just have been a veeeeeeryyyyyyy lucky man. 😉

  53. You have a vivid imagination Rupert. I’m sure you imagine yourself having thirty women too, only to wake up to the reality. Oh wait, that’s something that never happened is it?

  54. @Florian, don’t know what’s so surprising about being married to three women over a time period of 30 years.

    Sorry if your imagination is too limited to process that.

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