By Sir Hardly Anyone
In the part of the independent kingdom of Rutlandia whereupon I have my castle, we tell children not to make things up. “Don’t tell fibs” is what mater and pater say, and jolly right they are to say it too.
But when I said just that the other day after returning from a morning’s stag shooting one of the blighters asked me how many wildebeest I’d bagged and when I held up ten fingers he pronounced the fibs line.
So I had to explain myself by saying since I spend all day reading fibbies from the bloggettas it becomes a habit. And in deference to the old girl I had to buy a round in the pub.
Meanwhile I wonder if someone has noticed that from time to time we’ve had a bit of a laugh at Foot Lond? I wonder because suddenly we’ve seen a whole load of articles citing insightful and positive pieces from the site which get to the point in line one sentence one.
Now it is true that no one quoted their notorious article saying how utterly brilliant and wonderful Amazon is for getting its hands on some TV rights and then flogging these on to the punters at ludicrously high pries. But even so, telling us the end in line one: a bit novel.
Here’s today’s 10 wild and wacky whatnots.
1: Gelson Martins pronouncement by Arsenal Station and FootLond
The story is Arsenal are going head-to-head with Lazio over a deal to sign £52m-rated Sporting Lisbon winger
2: Ever Banega pronouncement by 101 Great Goals, Estadio Deportivo and Sports Keeda
Sevilla adamant Arsenal target Ever Banega is not for sale. But Estadio Deportivo has “revealed” (or is that invented) the notion that Unai Emery has made a call (personally in person) to Sevilla midfielder Ever Banega over a summer move. Which is probably “tapping up”.
Arsenal are keen on landing an experienced midfielder with Emery desperate to improve his midfield unit, they say. It was also reported that Banega’s agent was recently in London to negotiate the terms of the deal. Banega has a release clause of €20 million.
3: Sports Keeda and FootLond confirm what others are saying about Lucas Perez
Yep, it is the ongoing report that Unai Emery is going to give Lucas another go and apparently doing ok with Deportivo La Coruna for whom he played 37 times.
Perez will return to Arsenal next month and will have to fight the likes of Pierre Emerick Aubameyang and Alexander Lacazette for the starting spot. So we are told.
4: Arsenal Fever uncover the latest on Sokratis Papastathopoulos, and Goal.com confirm
And they tell us that Borussia Dortmund sporting director Michael Zorc has announced that no agreement has been reached with Arsenal.
5: Arsenal Fever also announce talks with Lobotka’s man
Lobotka is a player and not a brain related medical procedure and Arsenal have reportedly held talks with the agent of Slovakian International Stanislav Lobotka, who has allegedly “impressed with his performances in La Liga with Celta Vigo”. He’s a midfielder with Celta and played for them 41 times last season without scoring a goal.
6: Read Arsenal says that the Fellani deal is on
But the basis of this is a little tenuous as it comes allegedly first from the Belgian paper HLN, which was then picked up by Sport Witness, before reaching RA, with the player keen to remain in the Premier League “as he prepares to become a free agent in the coming days.”
7: FootLond get very excited and announce news in the first sentence: Ramsey is leaving
Now whether Foot Lond read our last little piece criticising their literary style or not we can’t say (we say but we can’t, if you see what we mean) but suddenly here the news appears in sentence one, rather than after eight adverts.
They tell us that Aaron Ramsey is off to Lazio and has turned down his new five year deal with Arsenal. This notion first appeared in the Telegraph back in May.
8: Metro reveals how much for Lucas Vazquez
And how much is a lot: £7m a year in fact. He’s 26, and played 16 times for Real Mad last season scoring four and assisting in seven. He’s a right winger, but here’s the thing: do we need another right winger?
9: FFC know Koscielny is leaving
This comes under the heading of “Potential Consequences of Sokratis Papastathopoulos joining Arsenal” and in a few words the consequence is “The end of Laurent Koscielny’s Arsenal career.”
10: Metro sometimes a little left behind in the rush
“Sokratis Papastathopoulos likely to join Arsenal, confirms Dortmund sporting director”. Well, yes, I think we already had heard that one. Although whether it is true or not is another matter.
There we go. Makes you think.
- Arsenal Transfers and the 40 a day habit
- Pre-Season thoughts on Arsenal’s squad and who can break through
- Arsenal’s transfer problem: Who leaves in order to fix the “17” issue?
- The great injury conundrum: how can Arsenal cope, and how are other clubs suffering?
- Arsenal Women – the Season Preview – part 1 Introduction and Hopes For The Season
- Why the media’s new statistical analyses of football is just a trick to stop you noticing what’s going on
- Yesterday’s game: how Arsenal won, and where the journalists got things wrong
- Brentford v Arsenal: past exploits and the Arsenal team news