Media suddenly confirms that finishing fourth was a trophy after all and everything is fine.

By Tony Attwood Suddenly it seems Chelsea is in total chaos and crisis (according to the media, not according to me that is) because (oh my goodness they have just realised) if Chelsea don’t make it into the Champions League that will reduce their income. Now of course Chelsea have had this sort of thing …

8 Astoundingly astounding transfer stories you really shouldn’t believe unless paid to.

By Sir Hardly Anyone At least you shouldn’t believe them because as the last two summers have shown only one in 33 of all such rumours is true and we’ve only got eight here.  But still, there ain’t much other news around so let’s do a quick round up. 1: Max Meyer Max is reportedly …

So what have Arsenal still got to play for this year?

by Andrew Crawshaw There are only a few weeks left of this season and I thought I would look at where our Men, Women, U23 and U18 teams are and what, if anything, they are still in with a chance of winning. If you are only interested in the Men’s first team, just skip this …

Lies, damn lies, and a total lack of concentration and research

By Dr Billy “the dog” McGraw, senior psychologist at the University College Hospital of the North Circular Road. There are some jolly headlines around on a day which is a public holiday in England, and thus a day without too much news. The Telegraph has “Tottenham would have been reduced to nine men with VAR” …

A pigeon flies across the sky. Why the media employs vegetables as experts.

By Tony Attwood “It shows well the state of our society that, when people are generous, we are surprised,” Mr Wenger said after the match. “We are even more surprised when it is footballers and strikers.” He was speaking about Aubameyang giving up the chance of a hattrick with the final penalty, to help Lacazette …

The curious lack of knowledge of the laws of football of the Stoke manager and a Guardian journalist.

By Tony Attwood Driving back from the match today I heard the Stoke City manager, a Mr P. Lambert, state on BBC radio that the first Arsenal penalty should not have been given because his Stoke player had got the ball.  The radio interviewer did not challenge or question this interpretation and his silence on …

Arsenal vs the Unspeakable. Multiple visions of the team appears plus a weird April Fool.

By Bulldog Drummond It’s an early start for those of us who live outside London so I am writing this piece quite a few hours before kick off, and thus I may be missing some late breaking news in terms of what sort of team we might put out against Stoke Neanderthals. But still the …