Absolutely nothing about Arsenal is true (including this headline)

So, what we know is that Kolo has got the plague – (big full page spread in The Standard yesterday saying that this was going to be an utter disaster and instantly means that Arsenal will be relegated to the Conference by Christmas).

But he hasn’t, he’s got little plague, probably because he was taking his anti-malaria pills like a good boy.

Eduardo has had a set back and won’t play until 2034, except actually he’s due back at the time of the Ashburton Grove Cup and will then be checked over, and could be playing in a few weeks after that.

Then there’s the fact that Arsenal’s new amazing incredibly player is actually a county in southern England – thanks to Young Guns for pointing that out.   I’m actually honoured to find that they read anything we write here, because the Young Guns site is bloody brilliant, and tells us everything we need to know about Somerset, Devon, Dorset, and of course Wiltshire (except it isn’t its, oh, Wulshore, or Wellsly (no that was the Duke of Wellington).

And the Guardian is reporting that Big Names from Birmingham City FC are going to be questioned yet again by the men in blue about mucking about with money (although no charges have been put and no one is saying that they done nuffink wrong ok gov?)   If you are an avid reader of Untold Arsenal you will know we have a special interest in Birmingham City FC since the attack on Eduardo – although mostly because of the way the club did things after the attack – claiming that it was all perfectly ok for their man to be playing again after 3 matches out – the same that Hleb got for a little smack around the face.

So we supported putting the Curse of Arsenal on Birmingham since when they have been relegated, had police raids that removed paperwork, arrested senior people, questioned them again, and then had one top man arrested after a complaint by a young lady from Essex.   Funny the effect we have on people.

And its Wilshere.  (I knew that really).


Oh and go and buy the latest Highbury High – its got an amazingly good article called Being Arsene Wenger.   My God that guy can write.

5 Replies to “Absolutely nothing about Arsenal is true (including this headline)”

  1. I heard Arsene Wenger has a dengue fever and will resign tomorrow from Arsenal. I also heard that Cesc got a loose stomach this morning and won’t be available to play till February next year, Arsenal won’t make any new signings in five years, and Van Persie has two feet broken. Why don’t they just leave us alone in peace?

  2. It’s getting annoying now – everything that happens to us is a ‘crisis’ but when it happens to any other team it’s no big deal. I can’t understand why they resent us for trying to do things the right way and spend within our means. Surely we should be applauded for this not berated for not joining the irresponsible spendthrifts living on borrowed time and money?

  3. I understand the view on birmingham but the picture is a lot bigger. You must read (FOOTBALL IS FIXEd . COM) To see the bigger plot against arsenal. Its not by accident the hate campaign against arsenal. type in arsenal. we all need to know whats going on!

  4. The full web site address of Football is Fixed is http://footballisfixed.blogspot.com/ – if you don’t put in the blogspotty thing you get to a site that offers to sell you a Mr T Henry at a special discount price. It’s a very insightful and interesting site, but don’t try and read it in the 30 seconds before you dash out to work.

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