Surprises are bad for one’s heart, which is why we need the British press.

According to those in the know, just four months ago we were desperate.  Not enough players.  Buy someone.  Anyone.

So we bought one player.  We got one player on a free.  One youth player stepped up and showed he was ready.  One player showed that the manager’s faith in him for the past few years was more than justified.

And we “failed” to sign those other people we were supposedly after, Luis Suarez and Gonzalo Higuain.

And now we don’t have a problem, so it seems.  Theo must surely be ready to play a full game, and we await the return of Podolski and Chamberlain.    And the man that the guys behind me have been laughing about for years – Nic B – scores a goal and they spend most of the match singing about him.

Has the world gone mad?

Well, let us see what Sir Alex F Word, the man who promised Robin van Persie that he would be at Very Old Trafford for 3 years, had to say about how these players come to Arsenal.    He said,

“Rosický becomes available, so Arsène takes him, because he’s his type of player. Arshavin becomes available, so in he comes. When you acquire a lot of those players, they are almost clones.”

God knows what he is talking about, but since he’s not a manager any more I am not sure it matters.

But for the journalists it does matter, because one way or another they are attempting to cover their backs.

Of course they can change position when they want to, and there is talk in the Independent today of Man U taking over Tottenham’s position of fifth in the league at the end of the season, amidst gloomy notes about the fact that this weekend Man U will be without RVP and Rooney.

Man U must spend BIG in January seems to be the call.

So we have had a lot of Man U stories, plus some amusing Tiny Tott stories, and an attempt to cover up a little bit by calling everyone who wanted Arsenal to buy more and more players in the summer “pundits” (as opposed to “journalists” – which is a little too close to home).

And meanwhile the old story goes on and on, that Arsenal have a centre forward crisis and a centre back crisis.

Quite what logic there is behind such issues is hard to fathom, what with Vermaelen available, and Sagna able to play in the middle, with Jenkinson as a back up full back is hard to see.  But the journalists (sorry pundits) are never very good at logic.

As for centre forward, there is not even a mention of the possibility of Podolski or Theo stepping into the position, nor indeed of Bendtner getting another game.

So instead we turn to… the fact that because Arsenal play last (Sunday afternoon) they are going to have a tough time of it because “the pressure will be on”.  Really?

Oh and there’s the fact Everton have only won once at Arsenal in the past quarter century so it must be time for them to win again because they have beaten the mighty Man U.

And we’ve got on Napoli and Manchester City so that should really test us and our players are going to be anxious.

But really, it would be so much easier if one journalist somewhere could just come out and say,

“Yep, I called it wrong.  I thought Arsenal would have another season of struggle and instead they are top of the league and playing a kind of football that others can only dream about.  The fact that they did it with just one purchase is even more interesting, and I didn’t see that coming either.

“And yes, for most of the last four years I’ve been treating the talk of the Anti-Wengerians as if they were an investigative journalism outlet, instead of treating them as a group with an unmoving agenda, and listening to what Wenger might say.

“And it is true I never saw the transformation of Ramsey as being on the cards, nor did I even pick up on the fact that Arsenal have invented a new system of a five man rotating midfield which is utterly bemusing most teams.

“And indeed I never really rated Koscielny and I thought Mertersacker was past it.

“And if I knew that Ozil and Wenger had talked prior to Ozil heading for Real Madrid, I forgot about it, because it doesn’t actually fit with my vision of Wenger as a crazed loon who waves his arms at referees.

“And yes I knew that there was a lot of research showing just how badly Arsenal have been treated by refs, and how well Man U were treated by refs, but the word on the block is that match fixing only happens in foreign places, so I didn’t run that story by the editor either.

“And it is true that I often suggested that Arsenal had a goal keeper problem because the guy is young, and Polish, and I’m not anti immigrant but…

“And now, having made all those stupid mistakes, rather than admit them, I am trying to cover up, suggesting that I didn’t say anything about Arsenal, whereas the “pundits” did and it is they, not me, who can’t really cope with it.

“True I could come out and say, ‘Arsenal are amazing.  I honestly don’t know if they will win the league this year, but they are an astounding team, and it must be wonderful to watch them play such football match after match.’   But no instead I think I’ll keep predicting gloom and doom, and if something goes wrong I will say, ‘I told you so’.”

Still, at least with the British press, just like the AAA blogs, you know what you’ll get.  I mean, if they did change their tune now, it would be such a surprise I am not sure the old ticker would be strong enough to take it.

Man City

The books…

Arsenal books for Christmas at discount prices

36 Replies to “Surprises are bad for one’s heart, which is why we need the British press.”

  1. Sorry I cant see who the auther is but I agree with every word.

    The paragraph I like is:

    “True I could come out and say,’Arsenal are amazing. I honestly don’t know if they will win the league this year, but they are an outstanding team, and it must be wonderful to watch them play such football match after match’ But no I think I’ll keep predicting gloom and doom, and if something goes wrong I will say,’I told you so’.”

    Because thats all I want. I don’t expect anyone to say we WILL win the PL because even I don’t think that, as I doubt most do. But many of us, as well as other teams fans (going by what I’ve had said to me) think we CAN.

    And yes for pities sake just admit you was wrong. I have had to admit I was wrong about Aaron. I didn’t give him any stick, in fact I felt sorry for him. If anything I was more annoyed with Wenger. I just thought Ramsey had lost it since his injury and Wenger was for want of a better phrase ‘flogging a dead horse’. What do I know.

    Anyway, excellent article, but there’s fat chance of any of our ‘pundits’ haveing the balls to have any contrition and actually say any of it though !!

  2. You could have added….
    ‘And yes, I admit that I kept urging you to buy Fellaini because a big commanding strong defensive midfielder was essential and I praised Moyes for getting him instead of you and I remember ridiculing you because you did your usual cheapskate trick and went for free signing Flamini instead. Seems you did indeed know best and I apologize.’

  3. Fowler said it on MOTD but smug ol’ Shearer just smiled at him. Never thought his smirk would be more annoying than his elbows.

  4. Know this great article is about pudits in general, but really fits the case of Shearer, a man who clearly loathes either something, or perhaps everything about Arsenal. Even Lineker is now using MOTD to make him look very silly. Any words of wisdom from Stewart Robson lately – I certainly havent heard any?
    But it must be said, even arch anti Arsenalist Adrian Durham seems to be significantly softening his negative stance on the club, not because he likes or rates the team/manager, but because they are making him and people like him look stupid. And maybe putting careers on the line, virtually everyone accepts MOTD is now playing catch up and needs a serious bit of refresing…maybe starting with knowledgable, intelligent, unbiased, untainted, and maybe even the odd foreign pundits more broadminded and more in tune with the more technical side of the game than the good old British game that has…erm…served us so well

  5. @Mandy Dodd
    Someone should indeed put Stewart Robson in the dock and cross examine him on Arsenal’s current successful defence. He said on numerous occasions that Wenger was clueless and ‘didn’t do defence’ in training and that he would not allow Steve Bould near the team on the training ground as they had had a falling out and didn’t speak to each other. I suppose, given all this, that Arsenal’s current terrific defence must be the result of the football equivalent of the immaculate conception.

  6. yes, Robson is an embarassment. I know he still does some pundit work, but his attacks on Arsenal were clearly personal, and the way things have turned out, would do nothing for the credibility of any outlet chosing to air them, even if they shared the same agenda as SR. Loved the way the great Bob Wilson took Robson to task last season

  7. Sorry I didn’t put the author’s name on. I wrote it at lunchtime in response to reading a load of gibberish in the papers, and was so steamed up I just wrote it and hit publish. It was me wot wrote it

  8. Mark Lawrenson ( he used to play for Liverpool who have never won the Premier League.) making his predictions for the weekend games says this regarding Man U on their game against Neverton.

    ‘But United did not play that badly and they had as good, if not better chances to win the game.’

    Then making his prediction on Manure v Newcastle he says this:

    “Moyes will not be helped by having Wayne Rooney suspended for this game after he picked up his fifth booking of the season against Everton.

    He will be hoping that Robin van Persie will be fit, but that situation is worrying too.

    Moyes says it is not a serious injury but Van Persie has missed four games now. It is obvious how important he is to United, and they need him back soon.”

    Not said ‘Manure are a one or two man team. That’s OK it is United and we don’t see this as a fault as we did with Arsenal’.

    Just when we thought that Arsene doesn’t do ‘tactics’ we get this from our pundit in his reasoning for his prediction on our match against Neverton on Sunday.

    ‘Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger was very clever with his team selection against Hull.’
    Wow Arsene ‘clever’ wow! Whatever will he learn about Arsene next?

    Mark continues:
    “But he (Arsene) was cute because he still played Mesut Ozil and I think he knew how much having him in would help Bendtner.”

    Arsene knows his players. That is a revelation! Has it ever happened before? I ask myself.

    He goes on to say:
    “And now, all the people that Wenger rested will be ready on Sunday.” What insight! What pundability!


  9. The level of gloating by some has begun to reach silly levels here .
    This article wouldn’t be out of place at the end of the season when Arsenal will have won the title and not a third of the way into the season.

    Also , I think the time has come to realize that certain ex football greats don’t make great pundits and perhaps should be ignored.
    I’m not UK based so I can only go by what other posters say about pundit predictions and if it’s true that some of them still refuse to admit Arsenal are at the very least title contenders then they are morons and lucky to have a job.

    In any case I’m not concerned with them as there are far bigger morons in positions of power who’s opinions and decisions could, and have hurt millions over the years and no retraction has been made. Issues like “trickle down economics” or “Irak WMD” just to name the few , but I digress .

    This is a football blog so let’s stick to football matters.
    Having predicted Arsenal to be contenders at the end of last season and having asked for an unspecified WORLD CLASS signing to pacify some fans and uplift the players , perhaps I too should feel a little smug but I don’t. This is going to be a hard fought campaign and many things can still go wrong – most notably injuries.

    If we can stay healthy I think we are better than Chelsea and equally as good as Man City. City may have stronger bench but I would take our strongest 11 over theirs any day.

    It’s a three horse race and I think we can win it .

    As for pointing out other’s mistakes and opinions gone wrong, I’ve always thought its best to start with your own , like suggesting Wenger tried to subvert Liverpool and had no intention of buying Suarez, and wasn’t it Guardiola who invented the five men rotating midfield for Barca in a system without a true center forward?

    Still, looking forward to your next article.

  10. Tom

    You talk in riddles.

    You say “The level of gloating by some has begun to reach silly levels on here”

    Then 4 paragraphs later you say “…..I think we are better than Chelsea and equally as good as Man City…” “It’s a three horse race and I think we can win it” Gloating if ever I heard it.

    Then you say “As for pointing out others mistakes….” then go on to point out what YOU percieve as others mistakes !!
    Slightly hypocritical don’t you think?

    Also you suggest that bad punters should just be ignored, but then admit to not having to live with the constant barage of abuse that Arsenal football Club recieves from our Jernos and ex pros alike, day after day.

    The analogy I make to our treatment in the media is to compare it to sitting next to someone who keeps digging you in the ribs. On it’s own it’s never gonna hurt. Even 2, 5, 10 times is not gonna hurt you but it’s starting to get right up your nose. The 15, 20 times and thats it. THATS ENOUGH and you snap back. Thats what it’s like for me with our media, constantly niggling away, time after time and some of us have had enough and hit back.

    It’s a natural reaction to constant provacation.

  11. Last season after such 14 fixtures Arsenal had 37 points, 32 goals for and 11 against. So pundits have right to be scepitcal about Arsenal claiming the title.

    But in 2013 Arsenal is very good
    in 33 matches scored:
    0 3 times
    1 13 times
    2 9 times
    3 4 times
    4 3 times
    5 once
    and conceded:
    0 13 times
    1 15 times
    2 4 times
    3 once

    averaging +1 goal difference/match

  12. We can’t expect pundits to change their tune they are among those who never change their tune.

  13. Strus.

    Must admit I don’t know what you are talking about but I’ve yet to see one Arsenal Player(or our manager) or fan ‘claiming the title’.

    The point that has been made though is that they are wrong to be sceptical of our ability to ‘challange’ for the title.

    A reasonable point in anyones book I would of thought.

  14. Jambug
    Mine saying that I think Arsenal are better than Chelsea and just as good as Man City isn’t gloating but rather my personal opinion and it could only be construed as gloating if Wenger himself said it as he is the one who deserves the credit for assembling the squad .

    As for mine pointing out the author’s mistake in assessing correctly the Suarez saga, I don’t think I m being hypocritical but in fact it’s the author of this article who ,by Wenger’s own admission got it wrong and as far as I know never have issued any retraction but seems to mind when other people do the same.

    But I’m willing to accept your point on how annoying and difficult to take constant anti Arsenal punditry might be if it goes on as often as you say

  15. Don’t think anyone should be gloating more enjoying where we are now. Tough draw for England they will certainly need people like jack who can keep the ball and maybe athletes like Gibbs in that climate

  16. Tom

    Take it from me Tom it does. From far too many ex Arsenal players than is healthy, as well as the multitude of ex Liverpool and Man Utd players that overrun our media.

  17. Tom wrote:

    “But I’m willing to accept your point on how annoying and difficult to take constant anti Arsenal punditry might be if it goes on as often as you say”

    You have conceded that you don’t live in the UK and therefore, you are not subjected to what the UK resident Gooners, including the author of this article, go through from UK pundits. You have agreed from the quote above that this could be annoying. So here is the thing: you are not exactly in any position to shush people from expressing their feelings, especially on a matter that by your own admission, does not affect you as it affects the complainants.

    You and I have had this argument before (I can’t recall the issue), where you argued with someone experiencing the issue in discussion despite confessing that you have not experienced it yourself. Look, every now and then we all read or hear about some things that just don’t go down well with us or that we instinctively think might be wrong. I get this. But no matter how much you may disagree with a stand on an issue, you cannot confess to not having experienced it while arguing with a person who has. I don’t see the point of making adversarial comments on issues that you have no experience of.

    On the gloating on this forum, if it upsets you so much you better keep off this site or start praying that Arsenal start failing because we are just warming up. We are supporters in bad times and by golly, no Monitor of Emotions is going to stop us from rubbing the noses of everyone who has ever made unfair remarks about the team and the manager in our victories. You want us to wait till the end of the season when we have actually won something and I say why not just stop following the team altogether and look at the table in May, to see whether you should celebrate a victory or be sad about losing out again.

    I think we Untold regulars intend to enjoy this roller coaster ride every step of the way, with the gloating and all.

  18. Leave out Tom everyone…some morons are either blind to reason or simply have an agenda!

    Great write up for its sheer literary quality…a rant which strikes a chord with all true Arsenal supporters…some more of this pent up frustration on paper please…! And the best part is we are not thinking of ourselves winning a trophy already…no…we are just enjoying the team playing…we are enjoying winning games…we are enjoying seeing Ramsey fulfill his long held promise, we are enjoying watching Szczesny becoming the world class keeper very few saw…we are watching a defence that is fucking unimpregnable…yes we are watching Jack scoring goals…We are enjoying the coming of season of our own boys…yes we are watching the magic of Ozil too…we brought back our prodigal and he turned into bendtner! And we are just enjoying what we are watching.

    I too wish some of them were men enough to admit that they were purely prejudiced against a man whose overall brilliance exceeds their’s (if they ever had any in the first place)! Wenger Rules…

  19. Famous players from the recent past may attract viewers and readers but it is well proven with this present generation of such that they are incapable of being objective, in their commentating, reporting or opinion.

    The English press (as in most countries)as its own agenda, so we expect pundits to tow the line of the paper that employs them.

    The BBC by using them is rapidly losing its reputation for objective and unbiased reporting.

  20. Bootoome, Asif and Colario.

    Three of my favorite regulars putting it as it is.

    Well said guys !!

  21. @jambug @ 10.18pm

    Agreed. I have only just now had the time to follow this debate & I fully agree with the sentiments expressed.

    I would advise a little caution – the AAA have shown some signs of adapting and in our present good run of results they try to appear less direct but just as sly in their attempts to denigrate Arsenal.

  22. @bjtgooner

    Everything possitive has to have a ‘but’ with the AAA’s.

    They just can’t let it go.

  23. Tom may be meaning to warn that there are many pundits out there praying, I mean, seriously praying that Arsenal stumble in on or two of the hot button December games. Or he may feel like some fans feel currently: more nervous for Arsenal than confident that they can sustain the run of good results till the end of the season.
    However, all fans can’t be expected to feel that way; all fans can’t be expected to let the opportunity that Arsenal’s current good run presents to point out the unmerited negativity of many pundits towards Arsenal. Indeed, in view of Untold’s agenda, the blog will be derelict to let the opportunity pass.
    Tom, lose the nervousness. Football is a sport, to be enjoyed, analyses and bragged about. Except for the pundits and bettors, win or lose, the fun is in the journey; in the ebbs and flows…

  24. bjtgooner

    Did I just fail the UA fan purity test, again?

    MOTHERFUCKER !!!!!!!!!!, SON OF A BITCH !!!!!!!

    Can I get another chance please? , pretty please….?

    Oh ! By the way, did you just refer to me as a triple A?, an “Amazingly Awesome Ass”?
    Well, thank you kindly. I do try to stay in shape . I’m glad someone noticed but I am hopelessly heterosexual . Sorry!

    Perhaps you can try Asif. He seems to have a lot of “pent up frustration”, I think he might be ready to come out.
    I think I just realized what bj in bjtgooner stands for.:)

  25. Shakabula Gooner

    Nervous? Quite the opposite actually .
    I feel so confident in this Arsenal team and Wenger that I don’t need every pundit on TV or other media to mirror my belief they are for real and get my panties in a wad every time they don’t agree with me ,especially ones who predicted Tottenham would finish ahead of Arsenal five years running . Ha ha ha!

    And if Arsenal do come up short in the end , I will not care because as you said “it’s the journey” that counts.
    And I am no trophy junkie.

    The goal Wilshere scored against Norwich , with the help of Cazorla and Giroud is worth to me at least a league cup trophy or even more.

  26. Jambug
    What kind of die hard Arsenal fan doesn’t believe his team will win the title when leading by four points a third of the way into a season . ?

    Oops! I think I hear the footsteps of UA police coming to revoke your membership card 🙂

  27. This is why dentists are not well liked – their humour is as painful as their handwork !

    This guy goes into his dentist’s office, because something is wrong with his mouth. After a brief examination, the dentist exclaims, “Holy Smoke! That plate I installed in your mouth about six months ago has nearly completely corroded! What on earth have you been eating?”
    “Well… the only thing I can think of is this… my wife made me some asparagus about four months ago with this stuff on it… Hollandaise sauce she called it… and doctor, I’m talkin’ DELICIOUS! I’ve never tasted anything like it, and ever since then I’ve been putting it on everything… meat, fish, toast, vegetables… you name it!”
    “That’s probabably it,” replied the dentist “Hollandaise sauce is made with lemon juice, which is acidic and highly corrosive. It seems as thought I’ll have to install a new plate, but made out of chrome this time.”
    “Why chrome?” the man asked.
    “Well, everyone knows that there’s no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!”

  28. Sounds a lot like the PGMOL ans Arsenal FC ….

    Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal Aviation Administration, and it was shortly before Christmas when the FAA examiner arrived.

    In preparation, Santa had the elves wash the sled and bathe all the reindeer. Santa got his logbook out and made sure all his paperwork was in order.

    The examiner walked slowly around the sled. He checked the reindeer harnesses, the landing gear, and Rudolf’s nose. He painstakingly reviewed Santa’s weight and balance calculations for the sled’s enormous payload.

    Finally, they were ready for the checkride. Santa got in,fastened his seatbelt and shoulder harness, and checked the compass. Then the examiner hopped in carrying, to Santa’s surprise, a shotgun.

    “What’s that for?” asked Santa incredulously.

    The examiner winked and said, “I’m not supposed to tell you this, but you’re gonna lose an engine on takeoff.”

  29. Uk pundits only??? NOPE…..Its a trend. ARSENAL are shit. ARSENE, oh he is tactically inept.

    We in India get to see Football Today. ESPN. And As per them, ManUtd are still contenders. And ManCity or Chelsea will take it in the end. And ARSENAL. Well, they think ARSENAL will drop down. “They’ve not won for 8 years.”

    Let they deride us. Lets keep doing what we’ve done all year long…..

  30. While we played 20-30 minutes like hell, letting Tigers sweat and pray to God Almighty just to come near half time to rest, without Podloski, Walcott, Giroud, Ox, Gibs, Sagna, Vermaelen, Diaby, Jack, Sanogo, Arteta, comentator was saying “Arsenal maybe look strong, but depth will win league, and maybe December will be crucial to define Arsenal season where team shortage may damage Arsenal position in league”.
    I was really wandering… what to hell is depth for them than? How many “crucial tests” we have to have?

  31. Armin

    I agree with you. What is depth for them? Who knows the thinking of those who are always right?

    You have given me an idea for an article. Thanks.

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