Grab your chance and prove your genius

By Walter Broeckx

Almost every day we get someone in the comment section who can point at all Wengers faults, errors and mistakes and then offer simple solutions.

That solution is mostly down to two words: buy X.

Buy X and the world will be fine.  Some will go further and say buy X and Y and we will win the league. We are just two players away from being world beaters. As they sometimes say.

But on the other hand the same people do nothing but throw insults at the rest of the players we already have. I can tell you already that the new scapegoat has been appointed and will listen to the name Per. Even when Giroud misses a chance it will probably be because Per breathed to heavily.

But anyway we do have a lot of FIFA Manager players on the site from time to time. Or Football Manger or… well I don’t know all the names of those football games but I do know that mostly all of them win all and everything when playing it. Why? Well because they are the experts of course.

But now there really is a chance to show the world what you can do. Get behind your computer, X-box or whatever it is called these days and prove the real world out there that you can do much, much, much better than that (insert the insults you want to use) Wenger.

Do you want to manage a top team? Do you want to manage the second best team in the world! Mind you not the PL, Bundesliga or La Liga or whatever…. No the 2nd best team in the entire world!

Well here is your chance. Shut us all up with your knowledge. Let us see that we at Untold know nothing compared to your superior knowledge of the game, tactics, injury prevention, defending, attacking, midfield tactics, …. What are you waiting for?

No the job of Arsenal manager is not open. No Wenger will do out this season as planned. But if you want to succeed Wenger and want to build up some credentials you better hurry up and apply for the open vacancy that is there in football.

After Belgium so miserably failed to live up their expectations the KBVB (Belgian FA) has decided the other day to sack Wilmots.

And now they have a job apply for becoming the new Belgian Red Devils head coach. How to get this job? Well simply go to the website and follow the instructions.

And the instructions are rather simple: send in a mail.

So what do they expect of this new coach? Well, all very simple as you can see yourself.

  • Experience and results in the currently fast changing world of football (looking at the way some pretend to know everything should be no problem)
  • Proven record in transmitting tactical and strategical knowledge to top level players (again by the claims they make on Untold no problem at all)
  • Proven record to be able to work with experts in modern high level football (as they are the experts themselves this should be again no problem)
  • Treating his own social and high performance context (okay so you might have to cut down a bit on the moaning and swearing and calling names and dead wishes at some people – Who knows you even have to communicate with Wenger himself at moments in time)
  • Strong and open communicator (by the way you speak should be no problem)
  • Ruling generation management (again no problem as they are the experts)
  • Proved to be able to operate in an existing structure and organisation + in full confidence being able to work with the team management, training facilities and financial, commercial and communication framework. (I know for most this will be too long to read and understand but as they are experts in all and everything and know everything much better than Wenger this once again should be no problem)


Now you might say that even the lunatic federation like the KBVB would not hire the first muppet that has come on Untold and spread his wisdom amongst to us deluded fool. But credit where it is due, they even hired Wilmots! So you should make a chance.

Now the real amazing thing is of course that when you negotiate with the KBVB after they cannot refuse or throw away your application and you could get a contract you make sure that you can step out any time and if they want to throw you out you ask for a € 1M compensation. That is what they did with Wilmots so keep that figure in mind.

And then you wait till Wenger steps down and when that happens you will be the first candidate to replace Wenger at Arsenal. After all how could they turn you down as you really would be a genius. Well you have pretended to be a genius most of the time.

And as Belgium is the current number 2 in the Fifa ranking you will only work with top players and so you will be able to bring them all to Arsenal once you have taken over from Wenger.

So what are you waiting for? Why hang around at Untold? Okay, thanks for the click’s but there are bigger things to do.  Prove us and the rest that you really are the best around and show that it has been a criminal negligence from Wenger and Arsenal to not have given you the chance to take over from Wenger.

Do let us know if you got the job, will you?

28 Replies to “Grab your chance and prove your genius”

  1. Lol! This cracked me up, Walter.

    Indeed, there’s a job opening there, why don’t these armchair managers have a go and prove us all wrong. Even if they miss out on this one, sure there’ll be a few more openings when the PL resumes…

    I can think of a few names that’d be good candidates for that Belgian FA vacancy 🙂

  2. Walter,
    Have you at long last lost that famous Flemish cool?
    Shame on you. Madame will be disappointed.

  3. To my mind the reason Wenger is so heavily criticised is because arsenal fc, surely one of the world’s best football clubs has failed to win the EPL since 2004. now, club fans know that those rival premiership clubs which have shared the honour among themselves during this period have always invested heavily in players. I’m referring to Chelsea, Manchester city and Manchester united. one is of the opinion that, if you as a coach believe that you are world class and can win things with what you have without having to invest in a few world class players, then you must prove it, just as Ranieri has just shown with Leicester. clubs such as real Madrid, Barcelona, Bayern Munich, Chelsea, man city, PSG or even juventus are not stupid. during the period of new stadium construction people showed understanding that the club was financially constrained but that is no longer the case with arsenal. so, why this half hearted approach in the transfer market as if one was pricing pepper and peanuts? I’m really afraid the 2016/2017 season will be another disappointing one.

  4. Even when something is at the excellent level, people will still find a BUT in it to comment on. There isn’t a thing on earth that is physical which doesn’t have a BUT. But some BUTS are more but than others.

    No strong football team that is is or once was who never has or had a BUT however big or small the BUT maybe. Arsenal had at one time in the past had an unbeaten league season campaign success and lifted the League title trophy. But some people still find a BUT in that their success to talk about it despite Arsenal going through a whole League season games without loosing a match.

    As a matter of fact, the people, more especially the media are always on the lookout for a BUT to talk about in the affluence, the wealthy, the icon, the celebrity and the champion to talk about. It’s a tradition. Therefore, the Arsenal boss – Mr Arsene Wenger I am sure is very experienced not to worry himself about any BUT the people or the media may talk about on his managerial career job at Arsenal. And should continue as usual as he’s been doing to dispel or debunk any falsehood that is levelled against him by anybody or by the media as regards to Arsenal titles challenge success in this approaching new season campaign.

  5. 1 ) An absolutely paltry line of reasoning – you cannot seriously compare laymen with a senior professional coach.

    Obviously Wenger’s benchmark has to be his peers at top level clubs: Sir Alex, Mourinho, Pep, Ancelotti, Klopp, Louis Enrique, Jupp Heynckes, etc.

    In relation to these, the Wenger of the past 12 years has been second-rate, at best.

    I don’t think critics in general of Wenger post-the invincibles would arrogantly presume THEY would do a better job than him. They’re saying that those he can reasonably be compared with are performing much better.

    2) And no, you falsely attribute to ”us” a one-dimensional belief in buying players.

    “We” also frequently underscore:

    a) Wenger’s (general) reluctance to adapt his tactics to the opponent
    b) his inability (these days) to inject into the players a winning mentality, a hunger to win games
    c) his static (and therefore inadequate) in-game management approach
    d) that despite having at his disposal two of the most critical factors of success (very wealthy club + longevity of being in charge of it and thus being able to build and hone a squad, to make it gel), he has not won the league in 12 years.

    This is why we now – sadly – adjudge Wenger a failure.

    Yet for all this buying world class players IS critical to winning the league, as a number of analyses corroborate.

    What does City, Chelsea, United, Barca, Real, PSG, Bayern have in common, Walter?

    (Yes, Leicester is the once-in-a-century exception that confirms the rule.)

  6. Walter this has made my day maybe those writers from fan sided will apply. Your work always makes me smile.

  7. May I suggest they take gary neville as an assistant. He does have 20 20 hindsight which he was so happy to share with us when he could project his vitriolic drivvel onto the televisions of the world. I feel he may already be a major role model to these people.

  8. Laos
    True indeed. Gary Neville and a few others seem to think they’ll build their careers on slating Wenger.

    If one wants to take a look at how much these guys know about football just listen to their punditry in the build up to a match, at halftime and then at the end. It’s so disconnected it’s unbelievable.

    I’ve watched other sports like basketball or NFL and their pre-game analysis and post-match analysis is very consistent. Now our ‘experts’ change their tone constantly as the match progresses like the wind, depending on who has scored, who has had how many corners, throw-ins, who is having more possession, etc. I’ve taken to tune in right in time for kick off, and change channels for the fifteen minutes at halftime.

  9. Needless to say I don’t bother with the post-match analysis, where they sound even more stupid trying to sound wiser with the benefit of hindsight.

  10. @Laos,
    Don’t even joke about the thug Neville.
    He and his evil brother were, amongst others, responsible for the Night of Infamy, for which they will never be forgiven.

  11. Off topic
    Sorry, haven’t been keeping up with the transfer bs, but pogba going to Utd for possibly £113m?! Wow. And I also read in the same piece that Utd have already spent £60m on two other players, plus the addition of £250k per week ibrahimovic… If mourinho held the keys to a nation’s bank that nation would be reduced to a basket case overnight.

  12. looking over all these (so-called) headlines on the web, I just wonder how these guys do it. I mean from the organisational point of view.
    now that I’ve followed this a few seasons, I just can’t help noticing the same stories coming up : pre-season is the recipe for losing players (alas it is not for all other teams who play pretty much as many games as us), same names on the ‘happening-rigut-now-just-off-the-plane’ transfer stories, going after AW, screaming mob of Arasenal fans ready to do the Arsenal Spring Revolution, etc etc

    What do you think guys ? They just recycle the stories like some presidential candidate’s wife just did in public yesterday ? Or just flip a coin to decide whom they match with whom ? They meet some day around season end and just put all the back stories in a bucket, each takes 50 or 100 and works with them throughout summer ?

    Or maybe it is just robots programmed to make headlines combining AW, losing, transfer not happening, unhappy, etc some word combination resulting in only negative headlines ?

    Then again, as there are enough gullible people to click and earn them their holidays or PL tickets.

    Just wondering….

    On the upside it gets UA clicks as well…so that’s for the good guys

  13. Walter -What a wonderful humorous post. Looking forward to the rest of the comments & CVs, resumes etc.

  14. @emmanuel. I can’t remember anytime Wenger was ever spared the slacks. When he was winning the Premiership title, the media came up with the idea that his side was the dirtiest ever as they were said to rack up the most cards and Wenger needed glasses as he was never seeing whatever wrong his players purportedly did on the pitch. Once they moved to the Emrates, the counting begun of how long ago they last won anything. Then they won two FA Cups and two Charity Shields precisely the years the trophy and shield lost their values which got restored last season when Manchester United won the FA Cup.
    Have you ever read it anywhere that Manchester United stand to make it FOUR consecutive seasons of not winning the Premiership since inception??? Not to talk of Liverpool (26) and Tottenham (lost count).
    Not investing in World Class players? How do you rate Ozil, Sanchez, Cech and Granit? Not to mention Ramsey and Carzola!

  15. If the FA of the second highest ranked country by FIFA , has its own cupboard bare and has to resort to trawling the bottom , what about the countries below the elite dozen ?
    Maybe after the Belgian have had their pick of the choicest cuts , the leftovers can be sent down to those at present not at the main table ?

    The latest rankings –

  16. And while we await the millions of ‘them’ know-it-alls to make an appearance , here is another though and difficult game .


    Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies
    obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer.

    Golf ! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins, on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.

    Golf is harder than baseball. In Golf, you have to play your foul balls.

    If you find you do not mind playing Golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here’s a valuable tip …your life is in trouble.

    Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot
    rarely make a perfect shot.

    A ‘gimme’ can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers …neither of whom can putt very well.

    An interesting thing about Golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.

    Golf’s a hard game to figure. One day you’ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green. The next day you go out and for no reason at all you really stink.

    If your best shots are the practice swing and the ‘gimme putt’, you might wish to reconsider this game.

    Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.

    Golf is like marriage, If you take yourself too seriously it won’t work, and both are expensive.

    The best wood in most amateurs’ bags is the pencil with an eraser.

    SENIOR’S DAY AT THE COURSE: David Letterman’s Top Ten Reasons Why Golf Is Better Than Sex…

    #10… A below par performance is considered damn good.
    #09…You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers.
    #08…It’s much easier to find the sweet spot.
    #07…Foursomes are encouraged.
    #06…You can still make money doing it as a senior.
    #05…Three times a day is possible.
    #04…Your partner doesn’t hire a lawyer if you play with someone else.
    #03…If you live in Florida , you can do it almost every day.
    #02…You don’t have to cuddle with your partner when you’re finished.
    And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex…..
    When your equipment gets old you can replace it.

  17. Robert I have published your piece here, but I think this is time to stop. Time and time again I have asked that comments on this site should provide evidence, and yet you won’t. You make four points a) to d) without any evidence, and ask the question about Man City etc, without considering that the three clubs at the start of that list are in the same league as Arsenal actually spent a lot of money, came lower in the league than Arsenal and two of them couldn’t even get into the Champions League.

    You have your view we have ours, and because you present none of the sort of analyses with evidence that Untold presents, we are left endlessly saying, “where is the evidence?” The debate simply cannot continue on that basis.

  18. I wonder when FA cup is no more a trophy.
    If Arsenal win the premier league twice in a roll does it stop being a trophy until we won the champions league ?
    We are insatiable, that is why Wenger have a degree in economy.

  19. @Brickfields G,
    Your 7.06 treatise on golf is absolutely priceless… and all true of course.
    Golf has been my No.1 sport all my life (2 handicap at one stage).
    My favourite saying to all who play the wonderful game is “Never forget that golf is a very humbling game”. 😉

  20. @ Emmanuel & Robert

    Perfect, you’re exactly the prime managerial candidates to which Walter refers. I look forward to seeing how easily Belgium win the world cup with one of you at the helm……………..

  21. The one strange and indeed remarkable omission from these football manager games are football “agents”. Considering their role and history in the game. GG, his pal he wasn’t envious of El Tel. That some agents have more influence in the sport then 99% of clubs out there…

    You make a succesful game about football agents alone! Think of the possibilities. Want to recreate the fun ransom haggle involving the signing of a world class superstar I mention no names -such as Gazprom, the specialist in signing special players signed up to special agents & only one Obi Mikel (there may have been others). Think of it as a cross between Grand Theft Auto and Sensible Soccer. Fun fun fun. Just don’t mention the footy.

    You could even have world class hacks harassing managers and agents with such gems as:

    “WHERE IS MY COMMISSION” didn’t you hear/read me praising your mule during the Euro’s?

    Avoid certain agents and the extremist far right wing funny papers (by the heir own words not mine!) might even accuse you of DITHERING for not overspending on the wrong player.

    I mean how could the national manager of Belgium spend £30M a piece on Bentake or Lukaku and still not be sure either of them are good enough to start for his team? No. Forget about coaching Belgium. You’re better off playing computer games and listening to marketing experts talk about football.

  22. After getting a very positive response from the regulars to my article on UBUNTU at , here is another tale of the same .

    UBUNTU – A very nice story from Africa …

    The motivation behind the Ubuntu culture in Africa …

    An Anthropologist proposed a game to the African tribal children …

    He placed a basket of sweets near a tree,

    And made the children stand 100 metres away.

    Then announced that whoever reaches first would get all the sweets in the basket.

    When he said ‘ready steady go!’ …

    Do you know what these children did?

    They all held each others’ hands, ran together towards the tree, divided the sweets equally among themselves, ate the sweets and enjoyed it.

    When the Anthropologist asked them why they did so,

    They answered ‘Ubuntu’.

    Which meant – ‘How can one be happy when the others are sad?’

    Ubuntu in their language means – ‘I am because we are!’

    A strong message for all generations.
    Let all of us always have this attitude and spread happiness wherever we go.

    Let’s have a Ubuntu Life …


  23. Kenneth Widmerpool -July 20, 2016 at 4:55 pm – Thanks . But sometimes in our haste to help others in danger or need , we may not think things through . Or just not think !

    UBUNTU GONE WRONG – The love story of kamlesh and kavita.

    Kamlesh and Kavita were both patients in a mental hospital..

    One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Kamlesh suddenly jumped into the deep end.

    He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.

    Kavita promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled him out.

    When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Kavita’s heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.

    When she went to tell Kavita the news she said, ‘Kavita, I have good news and bad news.
    The good news is you’re being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of the person you love.

    I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness. The bad news is, kamlesh hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he’s dead.’

    Kavita replied (you’ll love this) .

    ‘He didn’t hang himself, I put him there to dry..
    How soon can I go home?’

  24. An old man owned a pond on his farm, lined with fruit trees. One day he went there with a basket to get fruits. On reaching, he found some young ladies swimming naked in the pond.

    They went in deep water to shield themselves and said: ” We wont come out until you leave.”

    Old man: ” I’m not here to see you swim or to get you out of the pond. I’m here just to feed the Crocodile in the pond !”

    All the women rushed Out.

    Moral: No matter the age, Men will be men.

  25. Dear Brickfields Gunners

    To be absolutely ‘Honest’ I was the Crocodile in the pond waiting patiently for my daily Feed, so now and then I get “Lucky”

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