Who Arsenal need to sell: the story according to the media.

By Tony Attwood

Oh how the pundits love knocking Arsenal.  Define the club as failing and that means the journos can justify their notion that Arsenal are now going to bring in a whole new group of players.  Which gives them more and more stories to write without the expense of that annoying little activity known as research.   

Thus after the loss to Everton the Mirror announced “Arsenal have been dealt yet another reality check after an impressive unbeaten run.”  After the win against Southampton nothing changed.  We are still needing to buy.

Now you’ll remember that the last round of buying in August meant that we lost three games in a row, and has given us a defensive record worse than we had last season.  Which the media really loves.   

And now we have problems with Auba we are told by Talk Sport that Renato Sanches is ready to take on a new challenge which has boosted Arsenal’s chances of signing the Lille midfielder.

Anyway, on Sanches we are told he “first rose to prominence back at Euro 2016 but his career has not gone on like many expected” but “he helped Lille win Ligue 1 last term and is now being linked with a move to another of Europe’s heavyweight.”

However it is not all exciting news with new men on the way for also in the Mirror, Arsenal told they risk repeat of Mesut Ozil contract saga in “no win” dilemma

This concept comes from that chief prognosticator Darren Bent and once more concerns Aubameyang who the Mirror say “could be difficult to offload given his current contract.”  

Bent announced, “I said at the time Arsenal were stuck in no-win situation. At the time, Aubameyang was playing fantastic, one of the best strikers in the Premier League, single-handedly won the FA Cup for Mikel Arteta.   They started off the following season against Fulham, scored a good goal, got the contract and he has been a shadow of himself ever since.”  

But to be fair also let us consider the past of Darren Bent.   He was the man who when playing for Villa was photographed apparently out shopping while his team were losing to Liverpool and when he should have been at home recovering from injury.  He later apologised.   Then his manager said some odd stuff about a conspiracy theory (although it was never quite clear who was conspiring with whom) and then Bent had to deny having a fall out with his manager.

Bent, who also once appeared on BBC’s Celebrity Mastermind and scored a total of three points over two rounds, tells us, “It’s like the Mesut Ozil situation all over again. We’ve got an overage player, he’s not old, but he’s getting on in age that we can’t get rid of and on really high wages. So what do we do?

2 Replies to “Who Arsenal need to sell: the story according to the media.”

  1. Tony

    You might have a section of UA dedicated to Comedy where you just list the media comments. Readers could choose a best Laugh Of The Day. (Full transparency, that’s how I view 99% of media coverage of football.) Then Best of the Week, Month, year, etc. Perhaps an award for the most comical, ridiculous, false or meaningless story. Of course it won’t be difficult to project the winner. Mirror or football.london for my my money.
    Shall we give it a go? If laughter is the best medicine, the drivel from the media might cure a lot of the angst of supporters. It’s only Comedy, after all.

  2. goonersince72

    I think that sounds a great idea, and in the spirit in which is intended here’s a little taster of what I think you are looking for.

    It’s from football365, and Okay it’s from a year ago and may well be a little tongue in cheek but I’m sure it’s the sort of hilarious nonsense you’re talking about. Anyway this is it:


    “While we all know Liverpool are obviously going to win the title like the joy-snuffing miserable brilliant bastards they are, but… what if that doesn’t happen? Could table-topping Spurs win the title? Could that be a thing that actually happens in real life? Inexplicably, yes. Here are five reasons why.”

    Date published: Wednesday 25th November 2020 7:05 – Dave Tickner


    What makes it so funny is that you just know some spurs fans were actually believing this, possibly even Billyspurs, Nick and Dave M.

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