Munchister Untidy to be rescued by… oh dear…

Untold Arsenal: Arsenal News

And as today marks the 100th anniversary of the last day of Arsenal’s turbulent season when Norris first mentioned taking us over, today’s Sponsor is: Making the Arsenal


At Arsenal there is an issue for some supporters (the black propaganda revisionists and catatrophists).  They want us to follow the Charlton Athletic route to success by kicking out the most manager in the club’s history, and bringing in, well who knows.  Charlton you will remember were taken over by Alan Curbishley who amazingly made the little club a solid EPL side.  The fans then started the story that he had “taken us as far as he could” and it was “time for someone else to take us to the next level.”

Eventually Curbishley left  and the club returned to the third division.

This movement annoys me and frustrates me, but when I go for a moment’s perspective I have to admit that when it comes to crises we are just beginners.

For real chaos the past masters, present masters and future masters are Manchester U.

There, as we know, the supporters love the manager, but hate the owners.  True, one group went off and formed a rival team, which has done ok and is just about to get its own stadium right by where the club started.  But that’s not it.

Another group have different coloured scarves, but rather spoil the effect by still wearing replica shirts with the club’s sponsor (who keep the current mob in place) emblazoned on the front.  And that’s not it either.

But there are two other groups who do need to be taken a little more seriously.  One mob want to force the owners out by making the finances of the club even worse than now, and the the other want to buy the owners out.

And both have got problems.

Making the finances of Manchester even worse than they already are might seem a bit tough – they are £750m or so in debt after all.   And there is the thought that much more debt could actually mean serious trouble for a company that has run out of people who will give them money.

But United Supporters for Change are going to do this, and they have published a list of 400 firms that pay for hospitality facilities at Very Old Trafford, and are asking them not to do it any more.

As a starter the Manchester office of the also bankrupt AIG company that sponsor Manchester U shirts has been attacked.  and apparently Nike stores in Mudchester are having a difficult time what with guerrillas who can’t be separated from the more common gorillas who inhabit the streets of Manchester.

As with most of the very big clubs executive boxes and hospitality suites  make up about half of the match-day revenue so it is a good group to have a bash at if you want to wreck your club even more than it is, in the financial sense.

Then there is the rather amusing Red Knights – not to be confused with the Baron Knights, a popular singing combo of the 1960s.

Red Knights reckon Manchester Untidy is worth £800m.  Forbes magazine valued it at £1.19bn which is a bit over the top – but what do I know?

And that’s where the story stands until we all realised that top dog in the Knights is Jim O’Neill, chief economist of investment bank Goldman Sachs.  And that might not be a Good Thing.

The idea is that 50 people will drop in £10m each to buy Untidy and the rest will be made up with “securities”.  Then they reckon they can keep the existing bond issue to reach the £1.25bn they feel they need all told.  Which means that they take over, the Glazers go, but nothing much changes because that wretched bond still has to be paid off in a few years time.

With Red Football Joint Venture Ltd having accounts showing debts of £716m and a profit of £6.4m in 2009 (from Ronaldo) it don’t look too clever.

It all looks (maybe just to me) like another of those exercises that big bankers do, out of which they make a fortune and (in the words of the Who) we meet the new boss who is the same as the old boss.

In fact I couldn’t make sense until I read that the Financial Services Authority has finished a preliminary investigation into Goldman Sachs (where the Red Knights have their base) after the Security and Exchange Commission charged GS and one of its dogs with a £650m fraud case.   Just the sort of money you need to buy Unitedy.

Now the investigation does not have anything to do with Mad U, but it shows that the world of bank corruption is still worthy of a poke in the eye (if you get my drift).

A French dude call Tourre was based in New York at the time a deal known as “the Abacus transaction” was brokered by Goldman to help hedge fund manager John Paulson place a big bet in 2007 that the subprime mortgage market would collapse.  (I know, but I am not making this up, honest).

Royal Bank of Scotland, 84% owned by us poor sods the UK taxpayers, lost $800m because it had insured the arrangement through a credit default swap.

Goldman Sachs is expected to pay $5bn in bonuses this year.

So, would you have your football club rescued by those involved with this firm?

Frying pans and fires come to mind.  And somehow I fear it could all end in tears (but not enough to put out the fire).

There’s not much that might make me turn away from my beloved Arsenal but a Goldman Sachs takeover probably would.

Tony Attwood

Some of the other bits…

How missing your centre back pairing really hinders the attack

Is Wenger the nutty professor, or are lots of the fans utterly bonkers?

This team will have its day. There is something very special about to happen

What else is happening in this mad world of foot and ball?

Confused? Try “Making the Arsenal”

41 Replies to “Munchister Untidy to be rescued by… oh dear…”

  1. If I would be a United fan I would sleep bad every night.
    Now I only sleep bad after a defeat so I get only a few bad nights in a year and for the rest I sleep the sleep of the untroubled in the knowledge that my team is in safe and good hands and it will survive me for a long time.

    As a united fan you know can lay awake in the night and fear that it all will fall apart. I almost would begin to feel sorry for them… but to tell the truth I don’t.

    We can only hope and pray that keeping our club in a good and solid financial condition will be one of the most important tasks of the board and of our present and future managers.
    Let us never walk the way of UTD and Liverpool who risk their future for temporary glory and succes. Let us work the long way as it has been since Chapman started it when he came to The Arsenal and even he needed 5 seasons before being succesful.

  2. As a united fan you know can lay awake > please read As a united fan you NOW can …

    I’m not fully awake I think. Just slept too good. 😉

  3. And old red nose is off soon.
    Can’t wait for very old Trafford to crumble.

  4. Roy, I think he knows it is over at Utd.
    Like Tony pointed out they only made a very small profit and then to think they got som 80.000.000 for Ronaldo. Without that transfer they would have made a massive lost.
    So no coincedence.

  5. Well he is over 200 years old, so I think he is allowed to retire. But they will have a problem finding someone else who can run the club without interference from the owners.

  6. V. Informative article, thanks.
    There’s a colleague here who supports Norwich and is always being approached by sympathetic ManUre fans. He gets very annoyed by them.

    In the red box at the top of the page the word “catastophists” appears. Is that a misspelling?

  7. but the point is why are we talking about united…we should be talking about arsenal over here…we have so many problems to address…at least united have been more consistent over the past so many decades as compared to arsenal…rebuilding an entire generation of players after that fatal air crash…

    even if united have amassed a debt of 750 mills we should remember it is the biggest football brand…one day or other a rich business tycoon will come in and buy off the club and pay all the debt…

    my point is why throw bricks onto someones house, knowing our own house is made up of glass…

  8. “There’s not much that might make me turn away from my beloved Arsenal but a Goldman Sachs takeover probably would.”

    That means u will turn away from arsenal if it’s in turmoil????

  9. “fabianski is world class” – wenger

    mwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha…………..

    May be he wants teams to believe so that he can sell him for atleast for… hmmm…undisclosed transfer fees…..

    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha….

  10. @ Amit:
    even if united have amassed a debt of 750 mills we should remember it is the biggest football brand…one day or other a rich business tycoon will come in and buy off the club and pay all the debt…
    Where is that buyer.. Talking about these club issues Tony is just showing us guys that how safe our own club is.. We are already the 3rd richest club who have used teir debt most wisely..

    my point is why throw bricks onto someones house, knowing our own house is made up of glass..
    Our hosue is not made of glass, its made of reinforced steel.. Externally we are protected because of solid financial systems and internally we are solid because of great players and the GREATEST COACH

  11. “There’s not much that might make me turn away from my beloved Arsenal but a Goldman Sachs takeover probably would.”

    I think Tony means that he could become a D&G if that happens. He would be using his site to show how dangerous Arsenal is living if that would ever happen.

  12. Good article, Tony. I suppose thee only way the Red Knights will be saving money is if they don’t go the route of “management fees”. But surely the investors will want some form of return?

  13. Latest gossip: I think Mr Murdoch may find a way out of your nightmare about GS taking on Arsenal, Tony:

    He’s been wondering about what you get if you’re a schizophrenic Spurs supporter, finding out that Roman’s completely off with the fairies and Bernie Ecclestone’s mum was so ashamed of creating two dictators that she packed one off to Singapore in about 1930.

    At first it was all truly shocking. But on thinking about it…..

  14. In the US, Goldman Sachs is known as “a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity”(true quote from a Rolling Stone article).

    Simply put, you don’t want them anywhere near our beloved club.

  15. @Abhishek:
    1.) do you really think that united will go bust and file chapter 11 for bankruptcy…are you really thinking that??? i have based my assumptions on facts…if you look at EPL there are clubs now which were bought by billionaires with loads of wealth…shitty and chel$ki both of them…so cant a rich baron buy united…it is so trivial..any ways as i have said we need not act like a voyeur, i don’t care and i m least concerned with united’s affairs…

    2.) 6 years is no short time my friend..and we have left with fact a total disrespect to carling and the fa cup as well…arsene wenger says they dont matter…but he has forgotten a saying “beggars cant be choosers”…when i say “our house is made of glass” means we don’t have a single trophy in our house since the last 6 years…

    i agree with your point that arsenal is sound financially…and i am very happy that my club will survive and be stable financially for years to come…what i do not like is the adamant nature of the manager, the best example is when he came out with a statement…”ze keeper is world class, and zhat he will continue”…so do you believe that FLOP-ianksi will help arsenal any trophy…even the thought of that is outrageous…

  16. Amit it is interesting that while one reader on this site points out quite rightly that at the top of the page I can’t spell catastophist correctly, and you have not read that blurb at all, despite the fact that you comment on here regularly.

    The fact is that this site has, from day one, set out to comment on certain aspects of football from an Arsenal perspective. One of those is the issue of economics in football. Of course I know that many people are bored or disinterested in it, and many people who wish Arsenal were like other clubs choose to ignore the financial aspects, but that is what this site does. It talks about Arsenal, football economics, football corruption, and the way in which football clubs are organised.

    Sorry if you don’t like it, but that’s how it is.

  17. Critic – can you supply the source for your quote. I have just searched Google and although there are a number of people saying this, none of them cite Wenger as the source, and there is no article in any newspaper that has Wenger saying this.

    I think that when you quote you should give the source or else say, “I think I remember him saying it but I can’t prove it.”

  18. ”ze keeper is world class, and zhat he will continue”

    It’s spelled “the” and “that.” Otherwise, you’re just being an ass.

    I hate it when people mock foreign accents.

  19. Just read Ashravins latest comments about being unhappy Arshavin may be little be he has a big mouth considering that he had a poor season and has only been at the club for 15 months, I don’t know whether or not its the press winding things up but every time Arshavin is quoted its always a moan about Arsenal, although he is correct when he says that Arsenal have problems that need to be addressed, he is wrong when he says that they only require a couple of players, if they are to be SERIOUS challengers for all trophies then they need a lot more than three players with only Cliche, Vermaelen, Fabregas, Song, van Persie, Nasri, Arshavin and Walcott who I consider to be either World class or capable of reaching those heights in our current squad, the rest of our squad is either past it, average or below average, look at the players who have worn the shirt this season and many before who have had their chance but sadly should not be given the chance to any more like Denilson, Rosicky, Eduardo, Vela, Silvestre, Fabianski and Almunia, the ones that I haven’t mentioned are just squad players for me, we desperately need at least one big central defender in the mould of Vidic, another defensive midfielder to cover for Song who when not fit, Arsenal usually lose or draw, if we persist with the 4-3-3 formation then another couple of attacking midfielders/forwards who can score or play the ‘Arsenal’ way like Marc Overmars did and a World class goalkeeper, the ones we have a not even good enough for the reserves with the possible exception of the 19 year old Polish lad who’s currently away on loan, I don’t know what Wenger has to spend but he would probably need a figure close to what United got for Ronaldo to fix Arsenal properly, and probably just as important a new fitness team behind the squad because something clearly isn’t right there either.

  20. Scythe – if you would read back through this blog you would find we have dealt with this story many times over. There is no reason at all to believe that any of the comments made by Arshavin in papers are actually quotes from him. Rather as Untold has revealed, there is a battle going on between papers in which they are planting stories to make other papers pick them up, and then laugh at them. You admit that you don’t know if Arshavin’s is being quoted correctly, but then you base your piece on the belief that he is.

    Please do us the courtesy of reading back through what has been written here before.

  21. Tony, I liked the name Man IOU much more than Manchester U, or Munchister Untidy, or Mudchester Untidy 🙂 That is pretty symbolic of what is happening there… and its also short! Or am I missing some pun here in these new names?

  22. Hi Tony

    I just want to say that I fully appreciate your endless optimism for all things Arsenal and Arsene. So what I say next is not to be argumentive but to give an analogy to how I see Arsenal football club over the last 5 years.

    Imagine a swimmer in a swimming pool treading water but the water level is so low that when the swimmer tries to reach up to the ledge to grab hold and pull himself out it is tantalisingly just out of reach. Occassionally he gets a burst of energy and really starts kicking, so much so that he really gets his body far out of the water and his finger tips get a brief hold on the very edge of the ledge and for a very brief moment the swimmer thinks, yes this time, but he has expended so much effort just to reach the ledge that he tires and the fingers slip and he is back in the water treading away, waiting for the next burst of energy to try again.

    That, unfortunately is how I have seen Arsenal over these last 5 years. Always treading water but never quite having the power to make it to the top.

    If you can think of a better analogy to our current situation, I’m all ears.



  23. Hey Amit

    I used to work at Lehman brothers which was tooooo big to fall. I guess you understand that no chapter 11 news surprises me any more.

    Its not 6 years its 5. If Wenger is disrepcting FA cup by not rushing his injured players, you are even more disrepectful by even not counting it as a trophy. Atleast as a fan remember and repsect the wins.

  24. Sharky

    I see Arsenal differently – but using the swimming pool vision I saw as swimming ahead and ahead.

    Then the dirty rotten bounders from other clubs came along. Knowing they could not overtake our swimmers by swimming, they dropped a gigantic wave machine in our lane. At the same time they put a crane in their own lane, and used it to pick up their swimmer and drop him at the end of the pool, so he didn’t have to swim.

    Our response was to stay honourable and to put our lads on a better diet, and give them better training.

    It allowed us to stay up with the evil beings with their machines and cranes, and we waited. Eventually the swimming association said, right, after next year, no more cranes and no more machinery in the pool.

    “Huh” said many supporters, “they will find a way to get around such rules.”

    We meanwhile carried on following the spirit of the sport.

  25. Mahesh

    Yes I think Man IOU was the best of the lot. I must stop writing articles in the middle of the night. What seems hilarious then, isn’t in the cold light…

    Man IOU
    KGB in Fulham
    Liverpool Weetabix
    Sheik Yermoney
    The Tiny Totts

    they almost seem classic now.

  26. Tony, is Goldman Sachs worse than AIG? They were (are) the biggest insurance company in world, but they took on insurance when they didn’t have the money to pay out the policy holders. Yet Man IOU still stride around with “I am a fucking HUGE thief” written all over their chests. They deserve GS!!

  27. cape gooner — My sense is that GS is just as bad, if not worse. It appears, from what I can gather, that AIG stupidly took on super-risky insurance because GS duped them.

    (You can’t make this shit up. It’s better than any crime or conspiracy novel).

    But yeah, one is a crook because it was stupid; the other is a crook because it’s just plain evil (kind of like the administration at Portsmouth vs. that at Chelsea, only at a much larger scale.).

    So yes, f&ck Man IOU. They deserve the Red Knights. Haha.

  28. @Tony: Apologies from my side if i have been too critical…nothing personal…and tony, i read each and every word you write…every blog and every god damn aricle :)…even if i m belong to the D&G club..hehe
    also, when rinseout had pointed out “catastophist”, i was actually going to comment that tony meant “catastrophist”…

    @Abhishek: typo…IT IS 5 YEARS!! 6 without EPL…you havent said anything about flopianski have you???

  29. So, is it that Tony did not correct it (still says catatrophists)? Or were the misspellings misspelt? 😉

  30. @critic: my bad monsieur, “ze keeper is top class…” i pray everyday that we sign akinfeev somehow…cant imagine the numnber of blunders he will prevent…now this is a random calculation but if we had a keeper like casillas or akinfeev or van der sar or david seaman (read a good keeper); arsenal could have graced a few more points and would have been in the title hunt at this very moment…or even on the top…

  31. I would like to ask those that mock Mr. Wenger over his comments about Fabianski – what would be the point in him calling the keeper rubbish? We have three games left this season. We only have (practically) available two keepers (assuming Aluminia is injured for the season). We can’t transfer in a replacement. So at a minimum Fabianski has to be on the bench. The player needs support from everybody – fans coaches and managers alike. I recall Jens Lehman making similar mistakes when he first joined us. All players make mistakes, however unfortunate the consequences. I am sure Mr. Wenger will take a rational look at his performances at the end of the season and decide the way forward.

  32. Yes Stephen, I agree. What can you expect Wenger to say? Even if in Wengers mind he thinks he will let him go he can not say this in public as long the possibility is there that he can need him.
    Just suppose he choses Manone tomorrow and if Vito gets injured after 10 minutes. Then he have to put Fabianski on. And can you imagine putting a player on the field whom you have just said : you are shit, crap, whatever you want, but please would you now go on the field.

    Everyone who can not understand the words of Wenger in this has no knowledge of his job and of the mental welbeing of the players.

  33. some expect that wenger go out and told the hack:yes this player is rubbish ,actually too many are but hey its the only have got right now so i ve to play them .
    I ll never hear a manager say something like that about his own player

    Actually i think Fabianski is a good goalkeeper but he need to go on loan where all this idiot of arsenal fan will leave himbalone.The same people who judge Song last year to be championship player at best and now they are praying he can comeback on time for city game.Simple Fabianski has never really got his chance.How can you judge a GK on one match every month.A GK need a run before getting settle and with a settle back foor.

    Even with a world class GK we would still come short of winning anything.Too may injuries of first team player and to many out of form player

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