Ten transfer stories that are making the news as the new window approaches

By Captain Sir Hardly Anyone

It has been a little while since I last addressed an expectant nation (as it were) but with the glass opening ready to creak on its hinges in just a month and a half, surely there must be some more transfer news.

And well blow me sideways and raise the mainsail there is.   Here is a collection of some of the wilder and windier notions currently doing the rounds.

Tale number 1: Sanchez linked with City move following slow contract talks

There is no evidence for this but the Independent seems it will get them some visitations to their website.   Mind you they are also saying that Barcelona want to buy “Stoke defender Johnson”.  That could be quite a culture shock all round.
Tale number 2:  Arsenal midfielder Özil emerges as shock United target for Mourinho
Again, evidence is just about the last thing on anyone’s mind in writing this story.  But “those Arsenal fans haven’t had a good set to with each other for a while so let’s get them going” is very much the issue of the moment.
Although to be fair even the Indy has finally realised that Bellerin ain’t going.  But they still can’t quite bring  themselves to say so.   So we have “Bellerin set to sign new deal with Arsenal”.  Note: “set to” meaning he could always change his mind because Wenger suddenly cuts his salary in half, or says the last zero at the end was a mistake.
Tale number 3: Sweden wonderkind Peter Gwargis

If it is Arsenal and it’s the Metro, (and it is in both cases) then there is the transfer of a six year old you have never heard of.

Actually to be fair he is 16, and he has an agent, who spilled the beans to the Met.   Apparently he plays for Husqvarna FF in the aforementioned Sweden and is being compared to Mesut Ozil.

Tale number 4It’s back to last summer cos we can’t make up anything new.

If you read a story that starts, “Arsenal are on alert” you know that it is balderdash of the prime order.   And this one doubly so.   “AC Milan are reportedly considering a move for Leicester City winger Riyad Mahrez, who was the Gunners No.1 transfer target during the summer.”

Calciomercato says “AC Milan are keen on the tricky winger as they seek to strengthen their attacking options, particularly in wings, after an inconsistent start to the campaign.

“Mahrez has recently signed a new contract deal with Leicester City, and it seems unlikely that he’d leave the King Power Stadium in the middle of the season with the Foxes are enjoying a successful run in Champions League.

All of which means when Liga Financial says, in its headline “Fans must be furious as Euro giants considering move for long-term Arsenal target” that has nothing to do with the story

I have no idea why, or who these fans are, but then most of this seems to pass me by these days.  But then I suspect they are watering the lunch time Chilean Merlot at the Toppled Bollard (watering hole of the elite).

Tale number 5:  Mesut Stays!

Yep, it must be true because JustArsenal.com tells us so.  And how do they know?

Here’s the answer

“The Gunners star is rumoured to have recently bought a new house in North London for the price of around £10 million. Ozil joins the likes of Koscielny, Mertesacker and Giroud, as well as legends Robert Pires and Thierry Henry by living in the rich suburbs of North London.”

So that’s ok then.

Tale number 6: Messi Goes!

Apparently now that his salary has been chopped, what with the alleged loss of the alleged money alleged by the state allegedly to have been coming his way from alleged illegal deals (allegedly) the old boy is thinking he has had enough of this Spanish court lark and is ready to move anywhere with a healthier tax regime.

Since the Trump victory in the US it could be North America, given that the Trumpets (as Trump supporters with loud voices are called) are demanding the immediate introduction of the billionaires promised tax reforms which mean that the more you earn the less tax you pay.

The Sports Campus provided the “Messi leaving” bit of the story.  I added the rest.

Tale number 7: Jack ain’t coming back.

According to the old humorous Italian daily Corriere dello Sport, the Chinese owned AC Milan are interested in signing the very English Jack Wilshere.   Apparently Jack has said that he quite likes a Chinese takeaway, and so that’s done the deal.

Roma are also said to be interested, or have been interested.  Or could be interested. Jack meanwhile says he likes Bournemouth, and who can blame him.

Tale number 8: Barcelona want Iwobi

There are several rules to this transfer malarkey.  One is that every Arsenal talent is going to be stolen from us by Barcelona.   Another is that all the players we could get we don’t get because Arsenal are too slow and won’t pay enough.  And a third is that stories have to be made up otherwise the bloggettas and the newspapers won’t have anything to publish.  Finally, the story can be quashed – thus making another story.

So the Iwobi story has been around for a while, and we are already at the endgame according to Liga Financial which now says, “Confirmed: Arsenal winger Iwobi to stay at the Emirates amid Barcelona interest”.   So there we are, from start to end of the tale in seconds.

Tale number 9: The new “This is why” tale

The old “10 things we learned” headline has been done to death and subeditors are desperately looking around for new make believe to keep the stories alive.  The Express, daily pumping out its diet of hatred against the less fortunate in the world, is now running

This is the reason why Arsenal may have to sell both Mesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez

The reason – you will never have guessed – is… well, let them put it in their own words…

ARSENAL may be forced to sell Mesut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez – if they cannot afford to give them huge new contracts.
And yes, the Excess of Hate is on the job…
Express Sport understands Arsenal are poised to hold contract talks with Ozil when he returns to the club after the international break.
The story continues
“Arsenal are prepared to give both players bumper pay rises to ensure they sign extensions, with their current deals running out in 2018.   But the problem for the north London club is that in doing so they will shatter their wage structure.
“Arsenal’s rivals have been paying far more in wages to their players for far longer – Manchester United are shelling out £200,000 a week to Bastian Schweinsteiger and he hasn’t even played a game this season.
But then the normal rules of reality have never applied north of Birmingham, and even the West Midlands is uncertain.

 Tale number 10: Yes we are going to make a signing

One Nil Down Two One Up used to be a fanzine in the old Highbury days, notorious for having run a series of stories about how close Arsenal came to failure in 1989.  I am not sure if the website with this name is related to the old zine but anyway, they have a tale to tell…. once you get past the Sky Bet click bait which tries to trick you into going to the betting site rather than to read the story.   Hey ho, I thought that ploy had been scuppered, but it seems not.  Here’s the story…

Arsène Wenger is set to strengthen his defence with a £26m bid for Atletico Madrid’s centre back, Jose Gimenez.

Ah, so it is a “set to” tale and the bid is not quite the story we might imagine from a headline that says, “Wenger Ready To Buy World Class Player With €65m Release Clause”

They proceed thus…

The Uruguayan international was expected to consolidate his place in the Atleti line-up this year but a combination of injuries and the form of Lucas Hernandez and Stefan Savic have stifled his progress in the Spanish capital.

Arsenal face competition from Real Madrid for the 21 year-old but it’s understood that both he and Diego Simeone would prefer him to leave Spain if he is sold.

So thus and therefore we have it all.  Ten tiny tales from the tiny bloggettas and their little make-believe chums in the media.

Is any of it true?   Well, judging by the summer, around 3% of it will be.   Which means one third of one of those stories will come to pass.   That is to say we will sign one third of a player.


Tales from Untold 

Wenger ponders whether Yaya Sanogo will ever really be good enough for Arsenal. 

It’s not just the transfers that transform a team, it’s the tactics too.

Referee Appointments and Results Matchweek #10 complete with video evidence

Why Linekar and Collymore should be applauded for their stands against the media

Arsenal Ladies – Reflections on the season

Stadium reforms: away fan positioning to change and safe standing proposed

Referees – First quarter Report. This isn’t healthy.

10 reasons why England fail and will always fail in international football

9 Replies to “Ten transfer stories that are making the news as the new window approaches”

  1. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to see Sanchez leaving. If it’s true that he’s holding out for £250 thousand per week and playing for Chile while injured (we’ll see about that tomorrow), then his position at Arsenal would completely unviable.
    On the other hand good sense may prevail and he will fly home sooner than expected.

  2. Can’t wait until the 1st February, when all the rumours, counter-rumours and downright fairy stories about next Summer’s buying and selling, can begin all over again. 😉

  3. SportReview has a story about 15 transfers. 🙂

    Do I hear 20?

    transfer auction starts up …

    Feb 1 comes along, and the total is – 150 different personnel changes.

  4. What get’s me about all this rubbish in the media, is they don’t seem to care what they write. They even quote salary offers to Mesut that are BELOW what he is getting now, and that is obviously a load of cack and crap.

    John Cross is doing his usual shit stirring before we play United claiming that Sanchez is likely to leave but Ozil would be the more likely to stay. WHAT? He said this on Sky so it must be right.

  5. Le Prof was sometimes ago reported by the media to have by himself admitted that because of the short active number of years, say 10 years which footballers are limited with to ply their footballing actively before aging could force them into retirement from game.

    But being a big top football club like Arsenal are, we are in a deliema because of our club’s wage structure which restricted the earnable wages of their manager, staff and players to a certain limit so as to control any excesses of wages payable to their manager and staffing. This is what I call financial prudence worthy of emulation by other big EPL clubs.

    However, players financial thoughts are being controlled by fears for their future financial security which they want to secure to keep them going comfortably after their retirements. But clubs like the big ones of: Man Utd, Man City, Chelsea, Real Madrid, Barcelona, Bayern Munich and Juventus have in transfer wars to undo themselves in signing a player, do the signing at unpardonable outrageous transfer fee since there isn’t any transfer fee limit set by Fifa & Uefa to curtail the excesses of these 7 clubs when it comes to transfers.

    Consequently, top players at other clubs like Arsenal have seized this arising financial opportunity to seek to make more money in their career which has resulted from the fallout in the transfer wars between the above 7 mentioned clubs.

    I don’t thinking the attempts to snatch away top class players in this coming January window will be limited to only Arsenal as Liverpool too may fall a victim to this unwanted transfer attack from any of the 7.

    What is the way forward for us in this aspect? I’ll suggest if we beat Man Utd, PSG and Southampton in the PL, UCL & ELC after the interllul, and beat them with Ozil & Sanchez contributing significantly to the beatings of these 3 clubs to give us confidence in our season campaign in these 3 ongoing competitions, Arsenal may consider reviewing their wage structure to accommodate the high wages purported to have been demanded by ozil and Sanchez since we seemingly want to keep them. But will that agreeing to their high wage demands (£250k/w? NO!!!) not trigger a wage increase demands by other Gunners?

    Since Ozil & Sanchez are the only 2 world class we have, I think Man U & Man C could make every attempt possible to take these 2 big timers from us to deny us of our chances to win anything this season. And enhanced their own chances at winning titles. I think Le Prof has to be proactive to try to keep these duo by all possible means and also start now to identify which top player or players he’ll sign in January if it comes to that. So that our title challenge won’t be derailed but remain very much on track,

  6. Since Ozil & Sanchez are the only 2 world class we have,

    They may be the only 2 Arsenal players you recognize as world class. Don’t put words in everyone else’s mouth.

  7. I disagree wit Samuel dat Ozil nd Alexis are d only 2 world class players we hve; frm Cech tru Iwobi all our 25 listed senior players are world class bcos if available every top club wuld want any nd all of dem; rememba Iwobi’s rainbow flick against Algeria last saturday? , dats a world class skill nt many top players can perform wit such ease nd accuracy, d4 if Ozil leaves nd or Alexis , Le Prof as u call him will surely discover beta Ozil nd Alexis; how many of our previous top players who left in such circumstances are still top players 2day? Fabregas is struggling pitiably in Chelsky, Van perSe. Was a season wonda @ Man U,so. Much as we all want them to stay,if both players won’t reason wit us let dem go arsenal will remain nd get beta! Shallom!!!

  8. The media are all over the “rumours” that Mesut may, but Alexis may not, sign for £200k per week.

    What the media are avoiding desperately is reporting that England’s supposed new Messiah, Kane, isn’t going to get £120k a week at Spuds.

    This suggests to me that the media are just incompetent, and, that we value our players far more highly than they do down the road.

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