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Latest transfer news as bloggers reveal extraordinary ability to predict events

By the Honourable Sir Hardly Anyone MP.

Yes this really is the moment for the bloggettas to come out and show that they can foretell what will come to pass, so that we will believe all they tell us in terms of transfers that they absolutely know will happen, absolutely certainly, definitely, and for sure.

But credibility is all in this business, in between voting down the government last night I looked with much interest at the sites that dared to tell us the line up at WHAM before the game, and found myself reading which told us

Sanchez and Ozil dropped: 4-3-3 Arsenal predicted line-up vs West Ham

Still, one should never let one mistake cloud the passage to making 150 others, so here we go with the raging (or is that raving) transfer news of the day.

1: Karim Benzema
Well, we ain’t seen him around for a while on the transfer charts but here he is again.   “Arsenal table audacious £35m bid for world class striker – report” announces Arsenal Station.  Of course they try to blame someone else (who doesn’t?) by saying, “According to reports in Spain via the Express, Arsenal have tabled an audacious £35m bid to sign Karim Benzema but the offer hasn’t been well received by Real Madrid.

“Benzema has long been linked with a move to Arsenal with Arsene Wenger’s interest dating way back to the strikers time with Lyon before he joined Madrid in 2009.”  Hmmm.

2: Steven N’Zonzi

“Arsenal agree deal to sign Steven N’Zonzi” or at least so says Read Arsenal.  

They continue, “Arsenal have agreed a deal to sign Sevilla midfielder Steven N’Zonzi, according to reports in Spain.” ( to be precise).

“The Frenchman has a buy-out clause of £35.2million and it is reported that the Gunners have agreed to meet that fee ahead of the January transfer window.”

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This is the big story of the moment, as tells us that “Arsene Wenger agrees Arsenal’s first January signing worth £35.3m”  while Read Arsenal pronounces “Arsenal agree deal to sign Steven N’Zonzi. announces “Deal Close: Arsenal Set To Finally Get Star Player With€40M,” but adds “The Frenchman is yet to play for Sevilla since their last Champions League game against Liverpool, and there were speculations he isn’t in the good books of his manager.   But according to reports, the gunners are getting close to getting the 28-year-old’s signature.

“It was made known the French player, who has a release clause of €40M in his contract, [that was in the last paragraph too] could leave Spain in January and that Arsenal seems to have agreed to pay Sevilla for his signature. Arsenal have reportedly reached an agreement with Sevilla to sign midfielder Steven N’Zonzi during the January transfer window.”

3.   Lucas Vazquez 

“Club Ready to Offer €150million Star to Wenger’s Arsenal” says Soccerisma who cite Don Balon:

“The interesting point mentioned by the Spanish source is that Real Madrid are ready to incorporate one of their attackers in the deal to do Arsenal a favor. It is claimed that the reigning European Champions are willing to offer Lucas Vazquez to Arsenal.”

234sport have Real Madrid set to involve Vazquez in 28-year-old’s switch; Arsenal manager likely to agree to let them have Alexis in return.  Which brings us to…

4: Alexis
 234Sport (again) say “Arsenal To Finally Agree£300,000-a-week Deal With Star Player” adding, “According to new reports, Arsene Wenger’s side will make another attempt to convince the player to put pen on paper for a new deal with them.”

5: Jordi Osei-Tutu

“Official done deal: Arsenal confirm and announce new deal ahead of January” claims ArsenalNewsHQ  (where do these little bloggettas get these names from?)

“Arsenal have made a double contract announcement on their official club website.  But Gunners fans who are hoping it concerns star men Alexis Sanchez and Mesut Ozil will be left disappointed.  Instead, Arsenal have agreed deals to keep two of their youngsters at the club.

“Jordi Osei-Tutu, who can play at right-back or in centre-midfield, has signed a contract extension with the Gunners.   Osei-Tutu, 19, arrived from Reading in 2015 and has featured regularly for the under-23s.”

I’m not sure who the second player in the double is.

6: Giroud

“Arsenal to complete transfer of FIFA award winner, Wenger likes player” claims Giants Football News (another new one on me, but maybe I fell asleep while they were created) adding “Olivier Giroud might be on his way out of The Emirates Stadium despite Arsene Wenger’s hopes of keeping the Frenchman.

“According to L’Equipe TV in a video documentary, the Frenchman is willing to leave the Gunners in search of regular playing time.”

Is it just me or are the bloggettas getting a little more tentative in their old age?

7: Sergio Romero.

“Deal Almost Agreed! Arsenal tipped to complete shock switch of Manchester United star”.

This is again who said, “According to reports,” [ah the old fall-back, according to reports…] “Arsenal are the bookies’ favourites to complete a surprise transfer stitch for Manchester United second choice goalkeeper Sergio Romero.

“The experienced Argentina international safe hand has shone as a team player for the Old Trafford giant, showing that he could possibly be worth a starting place at most big sides.”

8: Nadiem Amiri 

“£20m Arsenal deal would be bitter Spurs blow… Pochettino has wanted him since 2016.” announce that the Tottenham manager “Mauricio Pochettino has been tracking Bundesliga starlet  Nadiem Amiri for over a year – but now Arsenal are attempting to muscle in.

In case you are interested he is with 1899 Hoffenheim, is 21, and is an attacking midfielder.

9:   Goncalo Guedes

“Arsenal finally set to sign PSG star man with UEFA forcing them to sell”.  This is from Arsenal News HQ who add, “Arsenal want to sign Paris Saint-Germain’s Goncalo Guedes next summer as they look for replacements for Alexis Sanchez and Mesut Ozil.”

Jolly good.

10: Steven N’Zonzi

Just in case his agent is getting worried I thought we ought to mention him again as Arsenal Football Talk now tells us that “Arsenal Trump Liverpool After Agreeing£35.3m Deal To Sign French Midfielder”

Mind you they also tell us that, “The January transfer window is just around the corner meaning clubs are working hard on potential deals so we’ll bring you all the latest gossip from around the globe” and I am so glad they told us, as we might never have noticed.

Anyway the tales is that “Arsenal appear to have won the race to land Steven N’Zonzi after agreeing a deal worth £35.3m with Sevilla to sign the midfielder in January, according to reports in Spain via the Daily Mail.”

Tony travelled back from Cyprus with a lady who writes for the Daily Mail.  I must share that story with you sometime.

But for now, I think it is time to go back to the House of Commons bar.  There’s usually a punch up or some sort of argy bargy going on at this time of day, and one does have a duty to keep the ladies safe.

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6 comments to Latest transfer news as bloggers reveal extraordinary ability to predict events

  • Goonermikey

    “According to reports,Arsenal are the bookies’ favourites.”

    This is even more ridiculous than normal. If the story is about who are the “bookies favourites”, why not just go on line and check the bookies? Why rely on “reports”? Do some bloody work and check it out. You don’t need inside information to do that. Idiots.

    Having said all that, it doesn’t matter what the bookies say, they are merely reflecting bets received and trying to balance their liabilities. It’s absolutely no guarantee of anything. Do people really think AW gives Ladbrokes a call to tip them off so they don’t lose too much money?

  • Andrew Crawshaw


    On December 6 Nketiah, Marcy and Sheaf signed new contracts. OTwo days later on the 8th Jordi Osei-Tutu and Joseph Oliwu also signed new deals

    Jordi joined us from Reading in 2015 and is a regular in the U23s this season and has been on the Beach in Europa League and Carabao Cup matches

    Joseph Olowu is a year younger and has played at both U18 and U23 level this year.

    Both are highly rated within the club and have the ability to make the first team if they continue their present rate of progress.

  • Samuel Akinsola Adebosin

    Despite that I think Arsenal will not sign more than 1 top quality midfielder in Jan, save if they are forced to increase the signing. I think Karim Benzema and Steven N’Zonze are looking to be potentially prospects for Arsenal singnings during the January transfer window. But how old is Benzema now? at 29 this month, if he’s signed and deployed to the Gunners front line, can the big striker who operates mostly from the left wing for Real Madrid be very effective in terms of goals scoring and giving assist for Arsenal that will impact seriously on both Arsenal Europa League and PL Title charges this season? And will his signing force Giroud transfer from Arsenal to happen in January? Giroud has more or less become a super substitute for Arsenal in the PL as proved in the Arsenal PL away match to West Ham yesterday night when he was lacklustered despite all the hype to start him. Giroud can only score in the PL when he comes on as sub for Arsenal. I think that’s his specialty.

    If Arsenal want to take the gamble to sign Benzema in Jan to see if starting from our home and away game in the PL against Newcaltle and to WBA which Karim win’t part of, Arsenal, win 21 PL games on the run to still challenge Man City to the Title who will certainly have problem with their results as the PL campaign pans on . Let Arsenal effect the signing with the minimum delays. So that Benzema will start starting Arsenal PL games as from their first game in Jan. Right? I hope Karim will not shun off Arsenal again but come to them if they can afford Madrid asking fee and his wage bill.

  • The_Ledge

    I’m more interested in “new deals” than transfers at the moment.

    I’m at a loss to understand why, given the appointment of “specialists” within the Recruitment/Retention department, Jack Wilshere says he is “waiting for a call from the boss” to talk about his future.

    So all the talk about “change” appears to be bullshit, and the Manager is still calling all the shots.

  • Mandy Dodd

    Don’t forget to add Lemar and De Ligt to the list!


    Was looking forward to a festive holiday season but have just read the following and as a result, I am now very, very torn.

    “Arsenal fans are torn over whether Mikel Arteta should one day replace Arsene Wenger. … Daily Cannon”

    I am now worried about what other AW replacements I will be torn about in future.