According to the chitter chatter of a million journalists trying to catch up with last year’s stories, up to one in four season ticket holders at EPL clubs are considering not renewing for next season in a bid to cut costs, according to a survey published today. And Manchester IOU are going to put their season ticket prices up yet again.
Unfortunately for anyone thinking of trotting in to see the greatest example of Positive Football the world has ever seen, this is cobblers. A few hundred people might see their dream of a season ticket come true this summer, but they will have been waiting ten years. A few more will pick up silver memberships, but they too will have been waiting nearly as long.
But hey, why bother with facts when there is this thing called Virgin Money’s Football Fans’ Inflation Index and that tells us that everyone is doomed. 4% of season ticket holders are not planning to go any more games and 21% intend to buy tickets when it suits them.
That of course is fine if you support Blackburn or Bolton where support is so thin on the ground that half the ground now seems to be shut. But it doesn’t make much sense if there is a season ticket waiting list of 10 years.
However with the ball rolling this is the moment when all the old stories about Arsenal come out. Apparently (so the stories say) you can now go up and choose where you want to sit in the ground if you buy a season. Like hell! I am trying to move as far away as possible from the cretin who spends the entire matches screaming abuse at Bendtner even when he is not playing, and Wenger, and I’m finding it tough just to transfer my seat.
But never mind, let’s contemplate stories about Manchester IOU and their price rises. Even before the price rise was announced it was said that 15% were giving up going to games entirely and 44% will only buy tickets when it suits them.
Virgin’s index (what a funny name – I wonder if there really is an Index of Virgins? You go on holiday to West Ham or somewhere and as you get off the tube they offer you an Index of Virgins…. Sorry – time for a cold shower… ) the Virgin Index shows that the cost of attending games has fallen by 6.8% in the past year.
Lower ticket prices and reduced costs for replica kit means the match-day cost has fallen to £89.09 compared with £95.60 in January 2009. Which is 14.29% higher than the cost when the index was launched in January 2006 but is substantially lower than the all-time high of £106.21 in October 2008. Average match tickets across all leagues peaked at £27.38 in July 2009 but have now fallen to an average of £22.59.
Here’s one amusing thing. The supporters least likely to give up season tickets are those of Liverpool and Stoke City. I guess that can only mean that they see things differently in the frozen wastelands.
And here’s another… The Glazer Regime has put up ticket prices by half in five years.
But of course this is all hypothetical. It is people who are “considering” – not people who have. According to the list 14% of Arsenal fans are “considering” – but this doesn’t tell the story. They are all doom and gloomers who can’t stand the success of the wonderful team that we have this year and going on for the next ten years.
Indeed, contemplate for a moment the sad lot of the doom and gloomer. They sit there, supposedly Arsenal fans, desperate for us to lose against WHU in order to prove themselves right.
But just in case we win the league or the Champs League or both they are sitting there with their excuses…
1. It was a fluke and we certainly won’t repeat it next year.
2. Chelsea and Man U will never be this rubbish again and will be reinvesting heavily.
3. Have you see the long list of kids that we are bringing in? Not only with AFC not win anything for the next 20 years, we will probably be in the third division south quite soon.
4. We are ripe for a takeover so we will collapse then.
5. All the kids are off anyway, going to Real Mad, Barca Barca BlackSheep and the KGB
6. If Bendtner hadn’t got that winner against Stoke we would have not won the league, and since Bendtner is an idiot we can take it that really he didn’t so we didn’t, and that’s what we told you all along.
7. We will fail the new financial rules
8. Everyone will now ask for double pay, and Wenger won’t pay up, so we will lose the whole team.
9. No one is renewing their season tickets in protest against Wenger.
10. The programme is naff.In case you missed it, have a look at the list of kiddies that we have got coming through. All the kids that will break through next season.There’s billions of the buggers, and half of them are English.
Anyway, here’s the list of the number of people are not going to renew their season tickets, for what it is worth.
- Manchester IOU 59%
- Wolverhampton Wobbleyou 54%
- Burnley Wurnley31%
- Fulham up and I’ll have a pint thank you Billy 29%
- Ever felt like giving up and just cashing in on the ground for flats? 28%
- Blackburn Rotational 28%
- Portsmouth Bankruptcy 28%
- West Porno 27%
- Aston Hold Your Head 24%
- All and sunderland 23%
- And Wigan 21%
- The Tiny Totts 19%
- Manchester Arab 18%
- Birmingham lets sue West Porno 17%
- The KGB in Fulham 17%
- Hull Spitty who will be bust so it won’t matter 17%
- Perfect Football 14%
- Notlob 13%
- Liverpool Owned by You and Me (via RBS) 9%
- Dont bet with 365 they pay Shawcross’ wages 9%
For an index of recent pieces about Arsenal and football (as opposed to an index of virgins) click somewhere around here please.
To look at the details of “Making the Arsenal” – a book so magical you won’t be able to believe you existed without it, do the same, but here.
To make a cup of team, turn on the kettle.
- Everton v Arsenal: a happy video, line-up and what the league table will look like after
- Everton v Arsenal: Injuries, points needed for 4th, and Arsenal the first to 100?
- Everton v Arsenal: extraordinary figures seen in the last 6 games table
- Everton v Arsenal: how this referee treats the home and away team
- Everton v Arsenal and the oddity of referee behaviour