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Arshavin signs and I am a total genius

In my story on January 26 I said that we were definitely signing Arshavin.  I said this not because I thought the Lord Wenger was desperate, and not because I had deep insight into the workings of the KGB, but rather because of the array of people who had far too much invested in the deal to let it fail.  (You can flip back and read my piece if you are really excited by such things, but probably better to accept it, read this, and then feel grateful that Untold Arsenal is here to sort out all the rubbish left over by other blogs).

As matters stand at around 11pm on Monday in the snow, we now have to wait for the EPL to allow the deal to go through after the deadline.  Since they did this last time we asked nicely (that funny Mr Cole wanting to play for KGB Fulham) I expect them to say something soppy, but let it happen.

So, why was it so difficult, and why did our Great and Glorious Leader persist?

Arshavin got a loyalty bonus when he joined Leningrad Rovers in 2006 and being Russian the club wanted it back, and asked politely as they do.   He said something that doesn’t translate very well into Ango Saxon.

So then the papers etc were abuzz with the deal being off, and had to do some quick rethinking to show that it was all on again and that they knew it all the time.  In truth, he came here, saw the snow, and thought, ah just like home.

As to why we want him.  It is rather as I said in my little snippet in the Observer on Sunday – (which I trust you read, and have saved for posterity).  If we had had just one of our creative whatnots playing with the wonderful Denilson, who has now become (according to stats) the best defensive midfielder in the league, we would have won

As it is we were depending on Nasri on his own – and that can’t be done.   True we brought on Vela, but Vela isn’t old enough to work in such positions – he has not had enough experience against the 10 man walls.

Our first player back (Theo) is four weeks away from being told he is ok by the doctors, and then he will still need some time to get back into football.   We need a midfielder now, because of the unprescendted situation of having all three creative experienced midfielders out for a long time, all at once.  Either Nasri or Arshavin will play in the middle next to Denilson.  The other will play on the wing.  I shall be deployed in my usual position in the upper tier, just to the left of the halfway line

So now we have midfielders in abundance.

I shall be signing autographed copies of my blog in which I predicted all this, along with memorial copies of the blog in which I got the Nasri purchase right at a time when everyone else had given up talking about it.

And if you keep this page open, I’ll tell you the winner of tomorrow’s 3.30 at Doncaster

Oh bugger – racing abandoned due to snow.  Sorry.

(c) Tony Attwood 2009.  (Actually the more eccentric these ramblings get, the fewer people copy them as their own and put them on other blogs, so maybe I don’t need to keep putting this copyright notice in.  But I do like seeing my name in print.)

Thank you for reading.

PS I shall look a total prat if by the time I get up tomorrow morning the silly bugger has changed his mind again and signed for Manchester Money instead.  But still, if you don’t stick your head over the parapet,  no one can use your ears for target practice.

PPS   David Beckham is buying Leyton Orient.

5 comments to Arshavin signs and I am a total genius

  • Mitch

    Well, well done for your bravery and I hope you are right! And if so, congratulations =]
    BUT…
    David Beckham is NOT buying Leyton Orient!
    http://orange.football365.com/Story/0,17169,8652_4874913,00.html

  • meditation

    Good fun tony. I haven’t commented for a while but i always read this blog and find it the best arsenal fans site for positivity. Even though you highlight the negativity in the game I feel that also brings positivity to the table. My reasons are I feel by highlighting the negative you can then look at where you can create positives in the situation or you can take positives out of the situation. whereas the people who live a bubble think everything is alright and they can only see problems that are not really a problem. i.e the tv remote breaking, you cant buy the latest car, denilson not being bought for 40 million or him not having the same dna and genetics as flamini. People like this can never see the bigger picture. I know this sounds drastic but this is what creates hatred , pessimists , envy, doubt etc etc. Correct me if im wrong but in psychiatrist terms (lol) its called displacement when one thing has annoyed ,upset or hurt you and then you redirect that pain onto something or someone else. which brings me to the point of Arsene wenger. People can not understand ARSENES vision so they get confused and upset so they redirect that fustration onto players. The media has increased that pain for the fans for years but this year has been a joke.They have created so much confusion just look at the arshavin transfer and thats just one example. Adebayor leaving, fabregas leaving ,gallas being shit ,wenger leaving, arsenal have money and then they dont, nasri, the need for a defensive midfielder( this was before the season started. there is many more but what does this create .Confusion. There is a spiritual saying in scriptures that says “confusion of the mind creates anger of the heart”. its so true.Also Plenty of times arsenal have lost and the slightest of things which have nothing to do with football have pissed me off which wouldn’t have if we had won .In my opinion there is two things that possibly is going on with arsenal. A takeover of arsenal and an agenda for arsenal not to succeed. There is a tactic that has been used plenty of times to over throw governments and companys. its documented that russian agents used this in past times. Its a four step process for the ultimate goal of control.
    1.destabllize
    2.demoralize
    3. cause rebellion
    4. Then takeover .
    we have all heard the word divide and conquer . i wrote this a while back on this site in the comments section.
    This has happened all season . Russian takeover possibly?
    Maybe all these tactics have been used to make arsenal implode instead of explode into greatness. We can say its joke when the media say what they say about arsenal but when it effects the team its beyond a joke. Its at an all time low. Eboue being booed by his own fans if thats not rebellion then… . Also i believe arsenal are not being left alone to play on a level playing field in the premiership. THERE HAS BEEN TO MANY bad decisions against arsenal for it to be classed as bad LUCK people need to wake up. because people don’t see the truth they find others reasons for arsenals failings hence displacement. Its weak to be like that in my opinion. Arsenal the club , management,players and fans need to start showing strength otherwise its over. Im telling you all it that is wrong with the arsenal players is confidence and alot of the fans dont have confidence in them. Thats a great way to move forward isnt it?yeah right. They need to feel at one with themselves but when the distraction of your own fans hating you it would take you away from self. You can take it from the opposition Fans because there the enemy you expect that .The only way it would work is if the player rebelled against their own fans and to get a different focus. Rebellion ,rebellion, rebellion. Well. I am glad to get that of my chest. CHIN UP CHEST OUT TOO ALL GOONERS

  • will

    Andrei Arshavin (I hope, please let it be so) is signing for us because he feels he has achieved all he can at Zenit. The seaon is over for them and while they hold the UEFA Cup, they didn’t even finish in the top three so (as far as i understand it, won’t be in Europe next season).

    While the odds are against Arsenal succeeding where Zenit failed and qualifying for the Champions’ League we still presented a good proposition for him in terms of the football we play, the players we possess, the quality of the league, and, though I get less sure about this every year, what we might hope to compete for in the coming years. In other words, the time was right for him to come to Arsenal.

    One final point. He might not be the solid, scrapping midfielder that we have missed since Flamini left, but in the absence of a suitable replacement this month, Wenger has done the right thing.

    Arsenal’s pedestrian attempts at breaking down defensively minded teams that clog up the middle of the Emirate highlight how one dimensional they have become. Without Walcott we pose little threat outside, and with Cesc jaded then banjaxed we rely on van Persie for creative spark. Arshavin addresses both of these problems. He might not be completely match fit but as he integrates into the squad we will be a much more potent side that can start turing these humdrum draws into convincing wins.

  • kameron

    YEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS, Thank God for that. I was waiting waiting and then went to arsneal.com and then i see the pretty boy. ha ha
    Now this is more like it, nasri, ash, cesc, theo, and when rosiky comes back, whooo hoo gunners can you feel it????? i caaann

  • jbh

    Arshavin signing confirmed. Sky sports news interview just seen. Quite impressed with Arshavin’s interview in English. He said: “I became a Gooner some time ago”, in response to the delays to the deal being done he said: “It doesn’t matter, I’m a Gooner now”.
    Not match fit yet, but very keen to get going with his new team.
    Put this down to the pulling power of the Arsenal style of play and AW. Obvious that he held out to play for Arsenal when other offers were available.