What happens to Arsenal if the media get their way?

By Sir Hardly Anyone

I rather think Untold should publish “Turnip of the Day” and pick a journalist for the award each day, with total number of awards by newspaper and individual reporter each week.  Maybe we can start tomorrow; I shall put this to the Untold board tonight, and hopefully tomorrow we can.

And we need to do this to counter the fact that the aim of the media is simple: to put about the news that the current team is rubbish and we should buy lots of new players.  Maybe we should invent stories about the blogs and newspapers we cover.  Now that’s an idea.

The media act as they do for one simple reason: articles about players in and out can be written from the desk in a matter of minutes, without any of that pesky reporting nonsense involving going out, finding things and above all thinking about them.

Indeed these days it doesn’t even involve making things up as it used to because now 99% of all transfer stories quote another site as the the source.   So, if you want to be a football reporter, just sit at your desk, watch the Arsenal transfer fantasies come in and there is your story.

Who makes the stories up in the first place – well, yes it’s journalists, and mostly they quote obscure overseas newspapers published in languages other than English, who, if you look at them, often don’t have the story in at all, or if they do, cite a website or newspaper based in … England.

So making it up is the name of the game.   But there still needs to be a justification – and that comes from the simplistic and utterly fake and untruthful sort of reporting that was mentioned in the last article.    For the last five seasons, only 3% of all transfer rumours have turned out to be true.

Thus I am proposing a set of stories about journalists in the way that journalists write about footballers.

Here’s today’s jibberish.


No Player Current club (Loan) Position Reported by.
1 Sander Berge Sheffield Utd Midfield HITC
2  Max Aarons Norwich Full back Daily Express
3 Jules Kounde Sevilla Centre back Daily Express
4 Yves Bissouma Brighton Midfield Africa Football
5 Layvin Kurzawa PSG Left Back Sport Witness
6 Paul Onuachu Genk Striker Sport Witness
7 Moussa Dembele Lyon (At. Madrid) Striker Daily Express, HITC
8 Edmond Tapsoba Bayer Leverkusen centre back HITC
9 Houssem Aouar Lyon midfield Football.London
10 Edmond Tapsoba Bayer Leverkusen centre-back Just Arsenal News
11 Kays Ruiz-Atil  PSG midfield Just Arsenal News


No Player Going to Reported by.
1 Bellerin Real Betis Sport Witness
2 David Luiz Daily Express
3 Mat Ryan Brighton Daily Express
4 Dani Ceballos Rea; Madrid Daily Express
5 Martin Odegaard Real Madrid Daily Express
6 Runar Alex Runarsson Daily Express
7 Sead Kolasinac Daily Express
8 Konstantinos Mavropanos. Daily Express
9 Granit Xhaka Wants to leave The Athletic
10 Lucas Torreira Atletico Madrid Daily Express
11 Matteo Guendouzi. Daily Express
12 Ainsley Maitland-Niles Daily Express
13 Joe Willock Newcastle Daily Express
14 Willian MLS Daily Express
14 Willian Chelsea Givemesport
15 Reiss Nelson Daily Express
16 Eddie Nketiah Daily Express
17 Alexandre Lacazette Daily Express

And it is interesting that these newspapers are inventing fake transfers because we all know that the current team is not rubbish as was shown in the article How 8 Arsenal players swept to the top 20 table in Europe this month.  Likewise we have seen the club has been performing incredibly well in the last two thirds of this season.

But sadly huge numbers of supporters believe the lies they are fed daily by the media.  So it is just possible that despite the incredible advances of the last five months, the club’s top brass might lose their nerve and do what the media and the media-supporting fans demand: sweep out a lot of the existing players and buy new ones.

However this brings problems.

The huge discontent fermented by Arsenal Supporters Trust and Black Scarf Movement will undoubtedly make many players think twice about coming to Arsenal.   Given that top players have a choice of which club they move to, the way the media talks of the club, and the way some fans react is always an issue.  In short AST and Black Scarf are actually responsible for stopping some of these players coming to Arsenal.

Worse, those members of the squad who are left behind will realise that it doesn’t matter how well they play or what they do, the club is now taking note not of the overarching, and thus far highly successful plan, but the media and some fans.  So more will then be edging to leave.

Worse again, there is no guarantee that the players coming in will settle in quickly.  It can often take a year or so for a player to find his feet, and from here on that period is liable to be extended.

Arsenal against the Media

One Reply to “What happens to Arsenal if the media get their way?”

  1. Mikel Arteta the AFC manager is reported in the media that’d included Arsenal.com to have said, the club’s hierarchy bosses that’s included he Arteta and Edu have a clear plan on how they can move AFC forward to perform very well to win the PL title and the 2 major domestic Cups next season. (a treble win in the offing?).

    Therefore, it will not be surprising if us Gooners see the media outlet journalists go into an Arsenal summer transfer frenzy meltdown stumbling over themselves to write Arsenal summer transfer rumours for next season’s summer campaign.

    More so, as Arteta has set the template for the media to extravagantly write Arsenal summer transfer rumours linking the club with countless new players signing unlimited this summer window.

    But nevertheless, whenever Arsenal do submit bidding for players who they want to sign this summer, then shall us Gooners know for sure the players the club will want to sign. For, the club don’t come out publicly to say, these are the players who they want to sign at any given time in a window.

    So, let us therefore wait for Arsenal to see who will be the new players they want to sign this summer when they submit biddings to sign them.

    But the pro and the con situation in the Arsenal first team squad for last season’s campaign suggest, Arsenal will definitely revamped the squad this summer with at least 4 top quality reinforcement signings. While in equal vain offload equal numbers of Gunners or a little more into the summer transfer market for selling to recoup some funds to help the club finance some of the incomings they will undertake to do this summer.

    In furtherance, I think a new top quality goalkepeer signing this summer for option and cover should be on the table at Arsenal to conclude. But save, if a rightback personnel in the team departs this summer, will Arsenal recruit a new top quality player to replace the departed RB player as fingers are pointing to suggest one of the RB personnel will depart this summer. But who that should be, I wouldn’t want to speculate.

    And if Arteta will give Saliba his chance to prove he’s capable of holding his own skill for Arsenal at the top level as a top quality CB to replace David Luiz. There will be no need for the club to invest on a new CB signing this summer in my own view.

    Furthermore, the Arsenal midfield department will need re strengthen this summer after two midfielders have left the department last season. But Willock has return to the club to replace Cebbalos? And rumour is saying that Arteta wants Odegaard back in the team this summer on a permanent deal. But if this rumour turnout to be true, does it mean Arsenal will not sign Emi Guendai this summer if they re sign Odegaard?
    Notwithstanding, i will love it if Arsenal will sign the duo midfielders this summer.

    In the 2 wing positions in the team of last season which majorly comprised Pepe and Saka. But the duo specialist wingers should be okay for the wing department this summer to not bring in any new winger.

    But in the striker’s department of last season, a new striker signing of a top League, reputed for scoring 30 League goals plus per season is desirous to have stationed in the department this summer. Despite that Balogun could be played to replace one of the striker departees who should leave the club this summer. But I wouldn’t want to mention the names of the strikers who I think should leave the club this summer.

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